i feel like 95% of queer discourse on the internet could be solved by either going outside and talking to real people or recognizing that sometimes you just have a shitty experience and it doesn’t mean anything deeper than that
“the queer community focuses too much on alcohol and drugs we need places to gather that aren’t the club” look up local queer community gathering places or volunteer opportunities. check out pride, they usually have groups there who are looking for more queer people to knit and read books with. they may even have booths and sign up sheets. go outside. also maybe consider going to the club anyways. just get a coke and chill out or some shit. who cares
“polyamorous people are all annoying and cringey and keep trying to push their relationship style on other people” have you ever met a polyamorous person in real life? or are you going off of internet memes and people on dating apps you were already swiping left on anyways? maybe meet more polyamorous people. or just better ones that you like more.
“bisexual people love to date gay individuals to experiment and then discard them for a privileged hetero relationship when they’re done” you had a bad experience and are taking it as gospel about an entire community. disentangle yourself from the narrative that there is a demographic of people that exists just to use and discard you.
“the queer community systemically hates men. I feel less valuable and my friends treat me like a gender traitor after transitioning” go outside and get better friends that aren’t transphobic assholes while you’re there. meet other trans people. “but these friends were also trans!” trans people can still be transphobic assholes. you had a bad experience. get better trans friends.
“asexual people are taking over the community and making it hard for me to meet other queer people that want hookups/i don’t want to share a community with these people” then don’t. go outside. go to the club. actually talk to people for real. try spending time in a community where you have the space to talk about sex. you are not going to get invited to the fun trans orgies by talking about your fandom guys on the internet and not putting any real physical effort into meeting people.
“everybody in the trans community is obsessed with sex and kink, there are no places for people who just want to talk about their gender and transition” have you even met any of these so called sex obsessed freaks. consider trying to start a conversation with them about gender and transition instead of writing them off because you don’t like their sexual habits. stop being an asocial weirdo. talk about the things you want to talk about. go outside.
“why do queer people keep inviting me to their improv groups. everyone assumes that because i’m gay i must want to do improv” this one is true actually. put on the jesters cap gayboy
“Society idolizes cis gay men, they’re barely even discriminated against nowadays, they’re like the straight people of the-” GET. OFF. THE. INTERNET. GET OFF THE INTERNET. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT A VAST AND DIVERSE COMMUNITY YOU ARE NOT A PART OF. YOU FEEL UNSEEN AND UNDERVALUED. GO OUTSIDE. MAKE AN EFFORT TO MEET THE PEOPLE WHO WILL LOVE YOU. STOP TRYING TO CODIFY YOUR PERSONAL SUFFERING INTO A EULOGISTIC MANIFESTO FOR THE PEOPLE IN YOUR COMMUNITY WHEN YOU HAVE NEVER EVEN MADE THE EFFORT TO MEET THEM.