valtsv:

forgissimus:

androidboy:

literally my favorite type of tweet

oh my god i have some of these saved 1 sec

Screenshot of a tumblr post reading: 

Gordon Ramsay: Fuck me, is that a fucking past version of myself? From before I tried the main course?
Waiter: Side effect of the house's special sauce, sorry sir.
Gordon Ramsay: Jesus christ now he's coming over here.
Gordon Ramsay: Who the fuck are you, why do you look like me?
Gordon Ramsay, ignoring Gordon Ramsay: God damnit, this obviously didn't happen in my original timeline.
Waiter: Sometimes the chef doesn't put enough tomatoes and the time loop isn't perfectly stable.
Gordon Ramsay: Not perfectly stable love? I know this isn't your fault but this is a fucking paradox! My past self is obviously not going to have the sauce in the first place now, and this version of myself will never come to be! It's unsanitary! Please bring the chef here I need to have a word with him.
Both Gordon Ramsays, in perfect unison, looking at the camera: Bloody hell, my notions of causality crushed and for what, some soggy fucking pasta?

The post is by ca314159bara.
ALT
Screenshot of a twitter post reading:

Gordon Ramsay on kitchen nightmares: Where are you getting this egg nog?
Staff: We milk it fresh from the creature every day.
Gordon: Fuck me... they milk it from the creature. This place is going under.

The post is by @snackoon and was posted Dec 18 2021ALT
Screenshot of a twitter post reading:

(Gordon Ramsay chewing out a restaurant owner over his old expired ingredients): And where the fuck does this door lead? If I see a- (inside is a vast chamber. The cavern ceiling is collapsed, a stream of water drips down as moonlight illuminates an ancient tree) oh for fucks sake

The post is by @lizardmancer and was posted Nov 24 2022ALT
A screenshot of a twitter post reading:

[Gordon Ramsay being lowered down a well] Fuck me

[The bucket he's in descends deeper, his voice is echoing now] I'm being lowered down a fucking well. Into the fucking darkness.

[He keeps descending, barely audible echoes now] Fucking hell this is deep. Jesus christ

The post is by @SexbeanPernicus and was posted Dec 20 2021ALT
beeelderly: "(Gordon ramsay chewing out a restaurant owner over his old expired ingredients) And where the fuck does this door lead? If I see a- (there is a hallway miles long, with ashen black walls and no end in sight)¹

1. oh for fucks sake"ALT