one of my top ten french behaviors is that i find it deeply jarring to see croissants (as a whole) be considered as “pastries”. a Pastry is an éclair or perhaps a millefeuille or lemon tart or macaron. it is colorful and sugary and generally dainty (not always) or indulgent (not always). croissants (including chocolate/almond croissants) are Not! Pastries. but carmine, you cry! what are they then? VIENNOISERIES. like wien. you know. the city. we stole them from the austrians like a william years ago. no yeah no it Is a stupid name. still not a Pastry however,
the humble Croissant will sate you in a pleasant but ultimately useful way. it is an Efficient and Unexpensive helpmate for hungry children after school and lovers who want to treat their beloved to a breakfast deserving of the name after a beautiful night and tired grownups who want to find a Reliable and Unexpensive reason not to Kill Themselves and get them through the day.
the frivolous Pastry will be bought and consumed by Relatively Moneyed Workers on their Company-Subsidized Lunch Break, Families who visit their In-Laws on Sundays, and Lovers wishing to Court their Beloved in an Ambitious and Elegant Manner,