Listen I’m aware you all want a piece of this. I understand I’m a hot commodity here on tumblr dot com. But even setting aside wealth and immortality, my husband squeezes the absolute fattest ass you’ve ever seen through literally billions of chimney flues every December 25th. And every other night of the year, he’s with me. And somehow you hoes think you can teach me a trick I haven’t seen before? Dream on.
