cerastes:

As a licensed therapist, let me tell you that the most success I’ve found with patients is not being uwu soft happy thoughts guy, and instead being someone that validates all the rage, anger, frustration and sorrow they have. Curbing it with fake positivity is unhealthy and self-destructive. Express it. If you need to cry, you cry, if we need to rage, we rage, if you aren’t good with words, we can do something more physical; I bought cheap plates one time, for this 16 year old girl who just couldn’t communicate and convey properly, then we smashed them together whenever our slow conversation touched on the things that truly hurt her, the idea being that giving a physical component to speech could help her organize ideas better, and it worked.

And after we get all that rage out of you, after we validate and shape it into something that’s nothing to be ashamed of and that needn’t be kept in a little cloister until it blows you to kingdom come, then we talk about how beautiful shit can be once rage and frustration are things you can grab by the throat. Yeah it’s not going to solve everything because a lot of psychological issues are symptoms of a greater root problem, and a lot of times, you don’t have mental illness, you simply don’t have money, but with that wholly on the table? Yeah it becomes easier to navigate potential solutions and increase resilience.

But seriously, “fake it until you make it” has a lot of merits but there’s a big red line that says “FAKE HAPPINESS” that you shouldn’t cross. Can’t blame you if you do, because we are taught “negative” emotions exist (they don’t) and that we have to repress and never ‘fail’. Fuck up a lot, and learn from it, learn how to get angry in a way that helps you and doesn’t hurt others. Way more productive than thinking happy thoughts.