hyperoperationfractallisation:
I’ve I’m ever forced into the ground, I don’t want to be embalmed. No coffin either. Just toss me into the ground completely powerless. I wanna Rawdog my funeral. It will be open casket because there will be no casket. I will provide shovels for you all to dig the shallow grave. It must be 4ft deep. I was the chance to be found after rain. A garden is to be planted over me. Nothing but Hemlock. I don’t want to risk being disturbed before it’s time.
I trust one of the various rat detector detectors will be able to organize it. Whoever wins the blood games at the end of my funeral gets the inheritance. The biometric lock only opens if there’s enough blood in the soil of the fighting pit. Each of you may only bring 1 weapon and it must be made entirely out of some kind of stone. No metals no wood no plastics or whatever. Only stone. Glass is acceptable but you’re on thin ice. Ice is also acceptable.
Now then. Good luck everyone on trying to outlive me. If you don’t, I’ll make sure your funeral is just as unforgettable as mine, and that’s a threat. Don’t bother warning your loved ones, they’re already doomed.
Mad