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roach-works:

unpretty:

unpretty:

unpretty:

HOW DID A BABY TURTLE THE SIZE OF A QUARTER GET INTO OUR LIVING ROOM

absolutely harrowing. it came out from underneath the couch covered in dust. my partner nearly stepped on it, and picked it up thinking it was trash. it was a baby turtle. it stuck its little head out and it was the size of a toothpick. we frantically ran it across the road close to the creek because we don’t know how long it went without food or water under our fucking couch. HOW DID IT GET IN HERE. DID A SHREW GRAB IT FOR A SNACK OUTSIDE AND THEN ABANDON IT UNDER THE COUCH. WHAT HAPPENED.

mirkwood spider express left tags reading "turtles can climb extremely well. the smaller they are the easier it is. also they wriggle through slits sideways like coins in a candy machine. when they hatch their first instinct is to find a safe place to hide. congrats your couch passed the safety check."ALT

YOU’RE TELLING ME THESE THINGS CAN CLIMB??

a photo of a different baby turtle previously photographed by my spouse when it was preventing them from moving the car. their fingers are in the shot for scale and it is barely larger than their fingernails. it is so small. it has no thumbs.ALT

THIS GUY?? THIS GUY CAN CLIMB AND HIDE IN MY WALLS??? BABY TURTLE INFESTATION?????

BABY TURTLE INFESTATION