I don’t know if it’s because I’m autistic, I’m not American or because there’s a special gun telepathy… But I don’t understand how mirroring would infer you’re a liar here?
Okay, so this is a very particular Thing that happens largely in the American south. It’s the shotgun wielding dad “what are your intentions with my daughter touch her and I kill you I’m the head of the household” trope irl. My father has never actually done it, but he was given a gun by another man when my sister and I were very small to be prepared.
So to the dad, anon just challenged his authority and his manhood. Dad is already threatened by his daughter having a boyfriend (and potentially eventually moving out due to that boyfriend/marriage), now anon is saying “I don’t give a shit about you or your threat” as far as the dad is concerned. So anon saying he didn’t mean it that way is what’s triggering the “liar” comment.
It’s a very patriarchal woman as property thing that crops up especially among white Southern Christians. I would lay money based on this story and my own experiences that anon is the girl’s first boyfriend and that she’s in the kind of family environment where she will live with her parents until marriage, a very literal dad giving daughter away at the altar situation.
Anon probably does not have sisters and didn’t have all of this subtext made text constantly throughout his life, even though him carrying on a daily basis suggests some level of immersion in gun culture
Tl: Dr the American south is a very weird place, he’s violating some established power lines and then “acting clueless” when the dad reacts to the social transgression
Ooooooooh!!!…. It is in fact special gun telepathy, but you must be THIS misogynistic to ride. I think I got it.
This was actually very helpful, and disturbing.
I think there’s also a level of, like:
Dad shows gun = “If you hurt her, I will kill you.”
Boyfriend shows gun as well = “I also suspect you of being capable of hurting her and anticipate having to defend her.”
And “hurt” in a dating context (or at least this specific gun related one) usually just means heartbreak, but “hurt” in a father/daughter context would more often be abuse.
So there’s an implicit accusation he could read into it that turns the conversation into:
Dad: I think this relationship might not work out, and you will hurt my daughter’s feelings.
Boyfriend: Well, I think you are physically harming your daughter, and brought this gun to show you I mean to rescue her.
Dad: How dare you! At least accuse me outright, for such a strong claim as this.
Boyfriend: I shall never say it outright, and therefore you have no evidence against me to use to kick me out right now.
Dad: So you plan to play ignorant if I bring your accusations to my daughter, and make me look crazy?
