*me, owning a strange boutique housegoods/book store selling a variety of mystic, occult objects but no one realizes I live there, this is literally my living room*
How much for this stick I can shake at God?
10 bucks
can i get these three backscratchers with a bundle discount
15% discount for 3 or more
How bout this book? I think it’s look cool with a cosplay I’m planning
40 bucks but never attempt to read or open it
How much is the doll?
Oh that? Just take it. Take it far far away and do not allow it to return
How about this?
$29.99. Just be careful not to leave the candles burning at night, the gremlin comes alive and likes to wander around and go through your stuff
Hey this chair looks cool, how much?
the chair chooses its owner. sit down and see if it likes you
How bout this
Excuse me that’s my great-uncle, he is family
What about this?
that’s not a sale item, that’s my dang lunch
How much is this neat tea set?
OH GODS YOU’VE SET THEM LOOSE
What about this super creepy cool chair?
that’s Lionel. they’re sleeping and I suggest you do NOT wake them
How much for this dandy fellow?
YOU WOKE IT UPWHY DID YOU WAKE IT UP???
How much for the guy that claims to be my childhood friend but remembers things slightly differently than they happened?
