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ckret2:

Two panel colored digital comic. Panel one: baby Bill Cipher holds a 2D cup with a pink liquid in it and a blue silly straw that wiggles back and forth. Panel two: a close up on the cup, captioned "2D silly straw. It just zigzags."ALT
Colored digital comic. Panel one: there's a bar with a couple of bar stools and a couple abandoned shots. Bill Cipher, covered in soot and letting off smoke, wearing a heavy, serious, distant look, floats toward the bar. Panel two: Bill sits at the bar, grips the edge, and stares at his hands as someone off screen asks, "Hey, pal. Rough day?" Panel three: Bill looks up and says, "Yep. Yeah. Uh-huh. First day in the third dimension. And I Just incinerated my home dimension. The whole thing." The off screen bartender says, "Oh. ... So! Something strong?" Bill says, "And fruity." Panel four: Bill's hard look has broken and, voice getting increasingly shaky and small, he says, "With one of those... little umbrella things? I love those." The bar tender says, "You got it, buddy." Bill says in a tiny voice, "Thank you."ALT
Panels 5 & 6: Hands laced on the bar, looking down at them, and looking increasingly sad, Bill thinks to himself, "Now what? Mom and dad are dead. Everyone's dead. Everything's gone. Way to go, Billy, you really showed 'em. I'm all alone. I'm gonna be alone FOREVER! They're never coming back and it's ALL MY FAULT! I'm the one who should be dead! What do I have left to live f—" Panel 7: The bartender says, "Here's your drink, buddy." and sets down some kind of wine glass with a bright pink drink, a strawberry on the rim pierced with a lime green paper umbrella, and a teal curly straw. Bill looks up at the drink worriedly. Panel 8: Bill slams his hands on the bar top and shouts, "WHAT!"ALT
Panel nine: a closeup on the drink, captioned, "Silly straw loops in 3D." Panel ten: a closeup on Bill's eye. It's wide, sparkly, and filled with starry-eyed wonder. Panel 11: Bill holds up the drink, looks upward, and thinks, "Maybe there's still something worth living for."ALT

someday i’ll stop making comics about bill’s passion for silly straws