noktsiae:

I have an awful habit of leaving things unfinished.

I don’t know if that’s a trait I picked up from my childhood but my projects always end off a cliff. I used to send my writing to friends, excited to show new updates or how much more had been written since the last, and they’d groan playfully, saying they wanted more and to keep going. But once I get that first impression and validation I no longer want to continue. Someone has seen my work and now it’s spoiled. I’m still proud of it, but not enough to finish, not enough to finish the story that I think about when I’m alone in bed. I’m the same with projects. If I don’t finish in one sitting I won’t allow myself to go back to it.

There’s a quote that’s like: I am a mess of unfinished words, of half strung sentences. I am an empty paragraph, a half cleaned kitchen. I am an unfinished love song, a letter that was never sent. I am half worked on and I am waiting for a sculptor to come and sculpt me. A painter to paint over me. I am waiting for someone to take care of me.

I am waiting for someone to move the pen in my hand and finish the rest of my letter. I am waiting for someone to walk with me to the post office and mail my letter. I am waiting for someone to sing my half finished song and to write the last word in my unfinished chapter. I am waiting for someone to complete all of me that is so incomplete.

I think that’s me