ernmark:

In writing, epithets (“the taller man”/“the blonde”/etc) are inherently dehumanizing, in that they remove a character’s name and identity, and instead focus on this other quality.

Which can be an extremely effective device within narration!

But these only work if the epithet used is how the narrator primarily identifies that character. Which is why it’s so jarring to see a lot of common epithets in intimate moments– because it conveys that the main character is primarily thinking of their lover/best friend/etc in terms of their height or age or hair color.