i would literally be the worst creepypasta protagonist. i would find an evil haunted copy of mario 64 and i’d boot it up and see mario’s face distorted nightmarishly and the title would be “SUPER MARIO DEAD 96” and i’d be like “wow what a cool romhack with no information about it anywhere online i can’t believe i found such a rare and beautiful thing” and there’d be blood everywhere and the overworld music would be screeching static intercut with barely audible whispering so i record it and play it backwards and the whispering is just “DEATH DEATH DEATH DEATH” and the spectrogram i generated is a small open-mouthed screaming face with empty eyes (which should be impossible considering the audio contents don’t correspond with the image at all, and the picture is strangely clear) and i’m like “wow such amazing attention to detail this must’ve taken so much work” and all the levels are named like ‘sector: EPITAPH’ with no enemies and untextured 3d primitives in an endless gray expanse soundtracked by slowed down n64 synthesizers and i’d say “wow this uncanny emptiness captures such a harrowing side of nostalgia, it really conveys this haunting impression of a missing or dead inner child or something” and then mario turns to the camera and starts listing off the coordinates of my current location and i’m like “wow they even put a geolocator in this thing” and i play the game nonstop because i’m absolutely enraptured by this strange and scary piece of art and i want to keep exploring it but then this ghostly kid emerges from the cartridge in a brilliant ray of light because it turns out by playing the game i gave this sad dead child an outlet to express his anger and grief and through my unconditional love and enjoyment of the game i’ve allowed this kid to play his favorite game one last time and so he vanishes, smiling, and now no one will ever believe me because all i have is this normal cartridge of mario 64 with the name “ANDREW” scrawled in sharpie on the back