Being a trans woman is something noble and holy. Suggesting a man might actually be a trans woman is the highest compliment that he could possibly receive. If you think it’s an insult or “too intimate” you are a lowlife transmisogynist, no exceptions.
re: that poll, i asked my transfem sister months ago if she came out to our other sister and she said “no, but it would be nice if she could just… tell”. she is pre-anykindoftransition like it wouldve meant so much to her if someone could say/notice. the hypothetical person in that poll is a) not trans, so no big deal if you ask, b) is a transfem and youre signifying youre safe for her i literally dont see why you couldnt ask her that