for ages i thought i didnt like drag because of internalized homophobia but it turned out i just don’t like bright lights and loud music and really visually complicated things
spd is homophobic i guess is what im saying
real talk tho this is a good example of how some things just can’t be made universally accessible. they are never going to make a quiet reserved drag show with few bright colors that i can enjoy. that goes against like…the entire point of drag and the celebrating of taking up space that a lot of gay events are.
and that’s okay! i wouldn’t want them to! i just need to find other things that make me feel happy and at home and part of the community. different needs require different solutions, and sometimes a thing just isn’t for you.
It’s good when you take a moment and examine yourself and be like “why don’t like I like this” because sometimes the answer has like 5 possibilities:
1. “this is just not accessible to me for Reason”
2. “I have trauma to work through”
3. “oh shit I have prejudice to work through!”
4. “I don’t actually have a reason. I just don’t like it because I don’t enjoy it”
Or
5. “It is objectively bad”
But often you don’t know until you take a step back and look at it from a different angle
And I think most people assume if they don’t like something it’s the last one but in my experience it’s the least frequent possibility