I left my YouTube on autoplay while I’ve been working and somehow ended up listening to a true crime thing and I would be absolutely fucked in a police interrogation.
“Repetition and forgetfulness during storytelling are signs of guilt,” the detective says with certainty.
Worstie, you can ask me the same question multiple times in a row, and I will think of new details to tell you each time while simultaneously forgetting everything else I previously told you. That doesn’t mean I murdered Karen, it just means I’ve got mental illness and ADHD.
By the way, this is part of why you never talk to the cops and you always get a lawyer. It is commonly held belief among cops that a number of common and totally innocent interrogation behaviors (forgetfulness, nervousness, forced calm, excessive precision, repetitive phrasing, inconsistent phrasing, etc) indicate guilt. And cops will testify at trial that their years of experience indicated you were guilty when you talked to them.
when talking with cops, it’s always shut the fuck up friday
Also this!
the cops down here in Oklahoma (where I am, at least) are notorious for being corrupt. Doesn’t matter what they do, you don’t say a fucking word. You sit there and stay silent, be still. They can’t legally touch you without a reason. If you’re still, they can’t claim you were reaching for a weapon, if you’re silent, they can’t claim you were being disrespectful (and therefore guilty.)
-Tips from a Southerner.
ALSO! IF YOU’RE DOWN HERE IN THE SOUTH, AND IN DANGER, GO FIND YOURSELF A HOUSE BELONGING TO A CRANKY ASS OLD MAN WITH A ‘BEWARE OF DOG’ SIGN AND FUCKING BOOK IT THERE. CHANCES ARE, THAT OLD MAN IS A MILITARY VET AND IS GONNA THROW HANDS.
OLD WOMEN ARE ALSO LIKE THIS, BUT MUCH LESS FREQUENT WHERE I LIVE
OR, EVEN BETTER, FIND LITERALLY ANYONE THAT SEEMS LIKE THEY COULD RIP A FACE OFF, AND IS KNOWN FOR BEING RUDE
(Most the time they will throw hands, cuz it’s their job to be a dick, stay away from their folks.)
LAST TIP, NO, YOU DON’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THE YOUNGER DOGS, OR THE BEARS (YES WE GOT BEARS), OR THE COYOTES. NO, THOSE AIN’T SHIT. WE GOT MOUNTAIN LIONS. WATCH OUT FOR ‘EM. DON’T FUCK AROUND WITH THE OLD ‘NICE LIL’ ORANGE DOG THAT ONE OLD LADY EVERYONE KNOWS OWNS. SHE WILL KICK ASS. THAT OLD DOG HAS SAVED LIVES. ALSO, IF A MOM TELLS YOU NOT TO TRY TO GO INTO HER HOUSE TO MAKE SURE HER KID IS SAFE, DON’T FUCKING DO IT. YOU WILL BE SHOT.