Reading a book with even vaguely old timey dialogue fucks up my language abilities so bad for days.
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I just responded to an informal email with “unlike the rest my present difficulties, this one was entirely my fault, but at least it’s easily remedied.”
Forcing myself to edit this next email to sound like a 21st century human wrote it instead of sending “please pardon the delay in communication; I was still lacking in suitable images on Sunday. Happily, this last week’s endeavors have yielded better stockphotos of sexy lawyers”
“Dad may yet effect repairs with sufficient application of wood glue and clamps—it’s simply beyond my capabilities”—unsent text to my mom about a broken piece of furniture
OP I want you to know I do this ON PURPOSE
Just give into the whimsy just do it just do it