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sleepy-bebby:

Steph:"my dad took over my hamster once i went back to college and ended up getting really attached and today he escaped and this goes to prove how truly pure my father is"ALT
Texts between Steph and her dad about her hamster going missing. Padre:”Please call me a soon as you get this it's an emergency” Steph: “dad do not freak out it's just a hamster!! we will find him” Padre:”Oh my God I'm so sorry honey” “I'm so sorry l'm looking everywhere” “Im so wicked sorry I'II keep looking all day” “I Can't believe this.” ALT
Padre:”This is the absolute worst ever” “I'm Never going to forgive myself if he doesn't come back” “Should I keep looking for him or is that going to scare him into hiding” “If I can't find him today I'm not going to work tomorrow so I can keep looking” Steph:”Dad- he's just a hamster i don't blame you at ALL. you shouldn't skip work you are a lawyer and he is a hamster”ALT
Picture of a hamster enclosure with food and a ring of flour arranged around the food. Steph:”that looks good” “what's the white arc of bedding for? or is that bedding? what is that” Padre:”Flour So I can see his footsteps if he comes to get the food” Steph:”oh that's smart” Padre:”So I know he's still alive” Steph:”that's smart”ALT
Padre:”I'm so sorry steph” “This is my biggest screwup ever. I will make it right” Steph:”No it's not” Padre:”I put him in his ball a whole bunch of times I should have double checked” “God is good I will trust him” “I know he likes peanut butter” “Peanuts” “That's a start”ALT
follow up: He did find him!!!ALT
Picture of Steph’s dad holding the hamster Steph:”OMG” “DID YOU GET HIM??” Padre:”Yes” “In his cage” “Are you effing kidding me”ALT
Picture of the hamster jumping up towards Steph’s dad Padre:”The little bastard is trying to get out again” Steph:”arrest him” Padre:”This was the most stressful day in my life since I took the bar exam” “Night”ALT