ouroborosorder:

for years the only thing on my laptop’s desktop was this photo of john cena that i named “i know i’m marrying your mother but you don’t have to call me dad unless you want to.jpeg”

saltioat:

I decided to take my little sea slug Nori on my seaside adventure~ <3

roach-works:

corporationkills:

wild cats are awesome because they range from “that’s just a cat”

to “are you sure that’s a cat”

el wiwi

wet chungus

milk5:

2025: We are so fucked this world is doomed

2026: So it’s called Dragon Chess and it’s like if shogi and balatro and runescape had a baby and its on sale for only 5 bucks on steam right now

ducktracy:

ducktracy:

ducktracy:

I FORGOT THE “NO”

happy pride everyone

scarymonsters-protectivespirits:

artificialsilkgirl:

reallyreallyreallytrying:

(trying to find a new way to get mad about sabrina carpenter) that’s not even how you walk a dog. you hold their leash. not a big handful of their fur

satan-offical:

I’m the type of gay conservatives hate. No rainbow is safe from me. “look! A rainbow!” And I glance at them with this sly look in my eyes as I whisper “it’s gay…”

ilovedthestars:

there really are few emotions i find more compelling in a story than “you should be afraid of me. please don’t be afraid of me”

sock-bread:

strongermonster:

strongermonster:

strongermonster:

strongermonster:

strongermonster:

strongermonster:

i buried a sword my f*ther made in my back yard YEARS ago and i live on a large plot of land and i can’t for the fucking life of me remember where, is anyone out here psychic enough to point me in the right direction, i’m getting exhausted and can only dig so many fucking holes in a day. yes i’m being serious, i want the fucking sword back

can’t use a metal detector bc junk land + lockdowns so i’m just going to dig holes all weekend until my momther starts screaming

only 46 more plots to dig

i was rly unclear so, yellow is places where there’s structures or whatever so it’s not possible for it to be there. red x is where i’ve already been :(

not pictured; mother yelling at me thru the window to fill in and re-seed the holes i’m making

i was going to take a break bc it’s hot and i’ve been playing manual-labour-battleship for going on 3 hours now, but someone just told me “there’s better lies to make up for notes xoxo” so now i ha—i Have to find this sword to deliver it personally up their ass

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LADS WE’RE IN 34 COULD THIS BE IT AAAAAAAAAAAAA

MY FAMILY SWORD RETURNS TO ME

a girl reunited with her sword

black-water-simping-ships:

rereading murderbot and i had a Vision of murderbot as a knight wandering into a cave to camp for the night & read by the light of its bonfire and ART as the hugeass fuckoff dragon inhabiting the cave <3

evengirlierballs:

milfyspamton:

milfyspamton:

milfyspamton:

anyone remember what these things are called like little cartoony expressive doohickies i think they have a real name but i can’t remember

im not fucking crazy.

if i have one more person say sparkles on this post im gonna blow i swear to god

They’re squeans I’m pretty sure! If they pop like that anyway. But the term for this kind of “symbol to refer to the general vibe of something in art” is called “Emanata” because it emanates from a person or object.

lazerswordweilder:

Imagine you’re arguing online about sanctuary moon and you click on the other guys (using guys as a gender neutral term here) profile and it’s a SecUnit.

A rouge SecUnit with hundreds of posts about Sanctuary Moon and a few other things, it even betaed a few fics for someone called ART who it publicly argues with but they’re clearly close friends (brothers? Lovers? You really have no idea), and sometimes the reason’s it’s been inactive are absolutely crazy.

What do you even do at that point?

chips1977:

I want you barefoot in my kitchen

kickasstorrents:

Computer run the simulation: what if i never ate even 1 candy in my whole life

fishtrouts:

ALT

ALT

ALT

ALT

ALT

ALT

ALT

Always a good time to burn down yet another village!

Patreon

is-this-blasphemous:

evilyaoimurdertime:

demi-shoggoth:

cerezaofthefae:

a-teacup-of-golden-cracks:

enki2:

Makes sense she gets bred and wines.

@is-this-blasphemous

opinion?

I do not like this at all, my child. I pray to the heavens that this was not, in fact, the last thing the late Holy Father view led before his passing. He would not have deserved such a horrible fate

textmessagepolicy:

qilingxiong:

watched the stalks of a lavender bush by the bus stop dip and sway from the sheer amount of fat little bumblebees on it and you know what. some things in this world are good

qilingxiong:

watched the stalks of a lavender bush by the bus stop dip and sway from the sheer amount of fat little bumblebees on it and you know what. some things in this world are good

surskip:

thank you mom

oh-dameron:

ART as an anaconda, a collosal boa snake that wraps around its people in the feed. The humans can’t sense how tightly it coils around them, but SecUnit can always feel how carefully ART isn’t crushing it to death. It splits off a partition of itself: a new hydra-head. It wants its own way and has no natural predators that might prevent it from getting it. Its love is merciless and inescapable.

oh-dameron:

ART as an anaconda, a collosal boa snake that wraps around its people in the feed. The humans can’t sense how tightly it coils around them, but SecUnit can always feel how carefully ART isn’t crushing it to death. It splits off a partition of itself: a new hydra-head. It wants its own way and has no natural predators that might prevent it from getting it. Its love is merciless and inescapable.

music-dreamers:

thegreatlearning:

lovelesswav:

distinguishedenthusiastcatt:

In Pride month, I think it’s important to remind you of this iconic dialogue. You don’t have to talk about who you are if you don’t want to❤️

kurokuro08:

Mr Jibbs they could never make me hate you

arithmeticanimaniac:

ellevandersneed:

ALT

this might be one of the worst things anyones ever said to me

​tumblr has some competition in the hate mail game

unpeeled-human:

on this website you’ll be like “why’d the chicken cross the road? to ‘get to the other side’ haha” and someone will be like “actually, chickens have no concept of an afterlife- in fact, it has no concept of a 'road.’ it does not see itself crossing anything, it is simply going somewhere it feels the need to go, likely searching for food, or-” and it will be completely unironic and there’s nothing you can do to stop them short of blocking them

important-cat-pics:

@important-cat-pics

the-real-seebs:

saltywinteradult:

wholesome-animal-images:

just look at these fluffy motherfuckers. i want ten of them

… i have seen things that look like this in a number of anime and i did not realize there was an actual animal.

helloitsbees:

crazy to me that I’ve been on tumblr long enough to see the vast majority of posts i see on a daily basis evolve from superwholock and fandom shit to this

sodiumfreak:

FIRST step to enjoying any media is getting attached to the character whose suicidal tendencies are the most obvious

antikittysocial:

mysteryfool:

thetomeoftatteredthoughts:

chaos-triangle:

oracleofsunnies:

babsvibes:

hilariouslarry:

This is my second time seeing bob, and now I’m reposting so I’ll always see him when I open tumblr

This’s my many times later seeing Bob!

hi bob

Hi bob

I HAVE SEEN BOB ONCE AGAIN

hi there, bob :3

avvocarlo:

oh you don’t drink coffee? that’s crazy man. I have one hundred thousand dollars in my pocket and I’ve decided to give it to you right now just for that

misty-feathers:

fanfic writers what font do you write in

i know on ao3 it’s all in verdana but when you’re drafting the fic in word or docs or whatever

choose

times new roman (you will never be free of times new roman, 12pt, double spaced)

arial

cambria or georgia

calibri???

helvetica

verdana

garamond

comic sans bc i KNOW some of you are out here doing this

other (tell me in the tags!)

sacred-portal:

grandmaster-paradox:

tam–lin:

r/Murderbot mods really said “if you can’t use it/its for a fictional character, get over yourself”.

These fans are savage (good for them).

boomer-mythology-destroyer:

1percentcharge:

ilovedthestars:

there really are few emotions i find more compelling in a story than “you should be afraid of me. please don’t be afraid of me”

emily-e-draws:

when you get half eaten by a hostile creature cause you’ve gotta save your stupid clients 🙄

grandmaster-paradox:

tam–lin:

r/Murderbot mods really said “if you can’t use it/its for a fictional character, get over yourself”.

These fans are savage (good for them).

doizy:

ALT

Good to know that the showrunners are being very deliberate in keeping Murderbot aroace, since I’ve been some people being worried they would ignore that part of the books.

thesparkinthefire:

Thinking about how ridiculous Murderbot TV episode 4 is from evil survey SecUnits perspective.

Because can you imagine, you know your clients are assholes. It’s not like you get to have an opinion about it or do anything about it because Governor Module. But you know that killing others to hide your own fuck up is bad. But you’re a SecUnit so you have to do what they say bla bla.

So you do your deed when this other survey group shows up with their shitty SpaceNokia SecUnit. And it is so stupid and pings the habitat and all so you know it is coming. And it’s so caught up in analyzing the DeltFall SecUnits that it doesn’t even hear you approaching. (fucking idiot.)

So you take your shot and then drag it into MedCenter(?) to install the CombatOverrideModule when suddenly that bitch(gender neutral) starts singing?? About a place beyond the wormholes?? And you are like “??? Querry = Can SecUnits sing?” because why the fuck would any SecUnit sing? And that’s when the fucker gets up and punches you.

But since it’s an ancient SpaceNokia SecUnit (how is it still working?) you have no problem to manhandle it and install the COM. And now it looks really stupid. Which is when you get imapled on a mining drill and- Catastrophic Faliure *windows shut off sound* (Embarrassing.)

When you come back online the human target and the SpaceNokia are gone, so you go after them. And you hear the SpaceNokia talk about abandoning ship (this is a planet habitat) and holding off raiders (you’re a SecUnit)?

Meanwhile a random other human target approaches the habitat and slams the “open door” button repeatedly when it’s clearly been locked. (Querry = stupid?)

Human Target 1 and the SpaceNokia SecUnit lock themselves into the Security Ready Room(?) and you have to blast the door, which is no problem, just annoying. And when you do the human shoots you. (Embarrassing!)

And when you follow them outside random other human is there too and the Stupid SecUnit just stand around while you headshot one of them (but can’t kill them because orders suck). And just when you’re about to get Human Target 1, you get pinged that something huge is approaching from above and- oh shit it looks like a hop- Catastrophic Faliure *windows shut off sound*

lee-the-eel:

in light of secret of the mimic (i have played ten minutes of it)