When I was a kid in Chengdu, China, there’s a public phone number you could call to ask about general stuff like train schedule, the weather, phone numbers to businesses, etc. I thought I could ask them anything, so I once called the number and asked “do pineapples grow on trees or the ground?” and the operator, after a moment of silence, said “go ask your mom” and hung up.
catchymemes
『 hodiaŭ infanoj diras aĵojn kiel “do kion vi faris antaŭ la interreto? ĉu vi simple ne sciis ion ajn?” kaj la respondo estas jes. vi demandintus al via oklino Marge demandon, ŝi donintus al vi malĝustan respondon kaj vi havontus tiun misinformon dum dudek jaroj 』
tio-trile
Kiam mi estis infano en Ĉengduo, Ĉinujo, tiam estis publika telefonnumero kiun oni povis diski por demandi pri ĝeneralaj aferoj kiel trajnhoraroj, la vetero, telefonnumeroj de establoj, ktp. Mi pensis, ke mi povus demandi al ili ion ajn, do mi iam diskis la numeron kaj demandis “ĉu ananasoj kreskas sur arboj aŭ el la tero?” kaj la telefonisto, post paŭzeto, diris “iru demandi al via panjo” kaj malŝatis la telefonon.
having the minions talks some weird mix of spanish, english and gibberish instead of just making them speak esperanto is actually the biggest flaw of the despicable me franchise
like just imagine how much funnier it’d be if they just spoke esperanto instead of saying shit like “dua lipa pina colada”
minionoj paroli ian strangan miksaĵon el la hispana, la angla kaj volapukaĵo anstataŭ igi ilin simple paroli Esperanton fakte estas la plej granda difekto de la despicable me serio
nyancrimew
do nur imagu kiel pli amuze estus se ili simple parolus Esperanton anstataŭ diri merdo kiel “dua lipa pina colada”
Having so many revelations about my voice this week this is crazy
Apparently a friend thought that all my (verbal) jokes were meant to be delivered dryly and that’s why they are funny. They were supposed to be full of whimsy and joy but no,, the jester jingled with empty bells
Anyways if you watch my streams and take anything I said seriously, I am sorry. I thought I was exaggerating my voice to deliver my wit and humor but alas I simply sound insane
wolfythewitch
Mi lernis tiom da malkaŝoj pri mia voŝo ĉi-semajne, ĉi tio frenezas
wolfythewitch
Ŝajne, amiko pensis ke ĉiuj miaj (parolaj) ŝercoj estis intencitaj seke dirita kaj tial ili estis amuza. Ili devintus esti plena je humuro kaj ĝojo sed ne,, la bufono tintis per senenhavaj sonoriloj
wolfythewitch
Cetere, se vi spektas miajn tujajn elsendfluojn kaj vi konsideris serioza ion ajn, kion mi diras, pardonu. Mi pensis, ke mi elmontris miajn humuron, troigante mian voŝon, sed ve, mi simple ŝajnis freneza
people should NOT be allowed to say they met their partner online when they used a dating site or app. if you say “we met online 🥰” i expect to hear that you got into an argument in a homestuck fanfic comment section and fell in love. that you met in a furry discord server and got married. not that you swiped on tinder until you met fucking josh who lived 3 miles away.
kragehund-est
homoj NE devus rajti diri, ke ri ekkonis siajn parulo enrete kiam ri ekkoni rin per rendevuretejo aŭ rendevuapo. se oni diras “ni ekkonis enrete 🥰” mi esperas aŭskulti, ke oni kverelis en la komentejo de homestuck-a verkido kaj enamiĝis. ke vi ekkonis en felana discord-servilo kaj edziĝis. ne ke vi ŝovumis je tinder ĝis vi trovis diable josh, kiu loĝas je 3 mejloj for.
I have to go see a notary today. Isn’t it messed up that they don’t give you a sticker or a lollipop after you go to these kinds of places what the hell
smokeys-house
Mi devas iri notariejen hodiaŭ. Estas aĉa kiel ili ne donas al vi glumarkon aŭ lekbombonon post via vizito al tiaj ejoj diable
Incubomurum domus, commonly known as “house meat”, is an amorphous vertebrate that lodges itself in the empty spaces of buildings.
Originally believed to have evolved in caves, it quickly adapted to human dwellings and their ample feeding opportunities. Apart from predating the inhabitants, they may cause structural instabilities to the foundation. Prompt removal is recommended.
This thing from future world!? This in every home? Thragg not sure if how he feel about future if wall meat there.
Luigi Mangione could be getting the death penalty…
This man is innocent, his appearance and build doesn’t match that of the killers, the only “motive” he had was a convenient written confession showing that he supposedly viewed healthcare companies as “parasitic” and too expensive (which does somewhat contradict the actual killers actions) he had said note and the murder weapon conveniently on him while living his ordinary life, the killer held the gun in his right hand while Luigi is left-handed, Luigi and the Killer were potentially seen simultaneously, they wore slightly different coats.
The NYPD KNOW these are different people, they know the evidence is lacking, this isn’t a mistaken identity, it’s framing, they are trying to make themself appear to still be control by catching this man, humiliating him, killing him, when they know full well that the person they are prosecuting ISNT EVEN THE RIGHT GUY! This is an injustice! This is not a fair trial! This is downright tyranny!
They confiscated his bag at the mcdonald’s, took it out of everyone’s sight, unpacked it and repacked it, and THEN took it down to the station and wow there was a manifesto in there that he was just carrying around in daily life for some reason
Definitely the sort of thing that the Bag Of Monopoly Money Guy would be carrying to McDonald’s
I have been on this thing for a while…, so hear me out once again:
Imagine if, and i ask a lot here, that he DID DO IT, but he was really good at ridding of the evidence. And they can’t share how they actually caught him, because they used illegal surveillance tech. And all the evidence They present is planted. So all the evidence is fake, but real proof is out there, it’s just nobody can find it.
And, now, imagine, perhaps, that after he gets proven innocent in court he starts revealing all the places he dumped the actual evidence.
That is extremely unlikely. But it would be hillarious.
It would be even funnier if they didn’t even know they got the right guy. They were just trying to frame someone who kinda looks similar and got the right guy entirely by accident.
That is even less likely.
I don’t believe either of those actually happened. But it would be funny if it did.
I’m part of a wood carving club and there are a lot of dads who are dripping with adhd/autism vibes who’s special interest is wood carving.
One of the master skill level carvers who we’ll call… Jim was working on a figure of a super heroine, who was frankly outrageously bodacious.
Several women in the club are uncomfortable with this. They tell me they wish he wouldn’t carve stuff like that at the club. This is understandable. I felt a bit uneasy too. I ask if they told him, and they say no.
This goes on for months. He’s at a point where he’s carving the folds of her skin tight suit. It’s shockingly impressive. A real Giovanni Strazza with wood here. Many of the women in the club, (also boomers) have stopped talking to him because they’re offended.
One afternoon I see a woman we’ll call Karen approach him and have this conversation
Her: Wow that is really starting to look like actual fabric. Him: Thanks! It’s been a really fun challenge. Her: I bet! She sure is - a lot- huh? Him: Yeah a lot of these comic book characters are really outrageously proportioned! Her: They really are! You know, when I was carving a sign that was political in a way i knew would offend some people here, I just felt so much more comfortable carving it at home. Him: *nodding* Her: Okay? Him: Yeah I get that. Her: Yeah. Okay. Good luck with her!“ *she walks off and he looks a little confused.*
Next week at the meet up Jims working on it again and Karen’s furious. Says to me "He said he wouldn’t bring it back! So RUDE.”
So I go up to him and we have this conversation. Me: Hey Jim Him: Hey Neala Me: Some of the ladies around here are feeling a little uncomfortable with the figure you’re carving because of her massive cartoon titties. Him: Ah shit, really? I thought they just thought it was funny. Me: Yeah folks laugh a lot when they’re uncomfortable and trying to hide it. Him: Mm, yeah and I can never tell which laugh is which. Me: Me either Him: Well I won’t work on this here anymore. I have other projects to do. Me: Hey thanks! I wanna see it when you’re done tho so take a pic for me, okay? Him: Haha sure!
I go sit down. Karen is shocked. Jim puts the figure away and works on a carving of a crane instead. He is not upset.
A week later I over hear Karen telling her friend I screamed at Jim last week.
having the minions talks some weird mix of spanish, english and gibberish instead of just making them speak esperanto is actually the biggest flaw of the despicable me franchise
like just imagine how much funnier it’d be if they just spoke esperanto instead of saying shit like “dua lipa pina colada”
I think I’d agree with this on the sole condition that they still say “banana” all the time
*kisses you directly on the lips* That doesn’t mean anything. *tries to walk away but my ankle rolls and i break it so now you have to put me down for ethical reasons*
