Concept: fratsonas. Create a self-insert that’s a douchey frat bro. Mine’s name is Josh
Everyone keeps tagging this saying they’re Chad but listen guys. We can’t all be a Chad. If you really want your fratsona to be a Chad you have to earn it
Ok so like I don’t usually add to posts on here but I’ve got a story about fratsonas:
I used to work at a cafe/crepe place and right before I left for school I was telling my coworker (Kyle) about how I had been thinking about joining the wakeboard club. It was funny to me because I am a very tiny lady and the rest of the club are all big buff bro dudes with long hair and backwards snap backs. So Kyle and I got to poking a little fun at them and began talking to each other in the “bro voice” at work, saying things like “bruh boutta flip this crepe bruh it’s gonna be gnarly, boutta shred this cheese like I shred the waves bruh” “yeah bruh you gotta SnapBack?? Cool cool” and so on. This went on for a couple days and eventually we came up with names for our frat boy alter egos. I was Chaz Michael Skyler and Kyle was Javelin Reviol Mcdermitt the Second. Our shenanigans ensued for like a week as we developed personalities and backstories for our fratsonas. Eventually the rest of he staff got in on it. One girl went by Shredder Cheese and would do the rock on sign, stick her tongue out and yell “SHREDDER!!” And we’d all cheer in the back room. Another guy went simple by Legend. He was the coolest frat guy by far. A real strong silent type. A personal favorite of mine was our assistant manager joined in as an exchange student from Ireland nicknamed Shotgun Shamus who could shotgun literally anything. We’d be making batter in the back room and he’d drop to his knees and shotgun the left over milk before crushing the carton against his forehead and slamming it into the recycle bin. This went on right up until my last day.
“not even trying to be reactionary or "edgy” or say this shit for shock value. i genuinely mean what i say. corporations giggle at protesting. why would anyone ever willingly come down off their throne that they’ve spent years building off the suffering of their fellow man? nobody is getting visited by the ghost of christmas future. no one is having a change of heart, it’s simple. you make them fear for their lives and hit them in the only place they hurt or nothing will ever get done. i don’t even see how that’s an incredibly radical idea. it seems quite straightforward to me. “violence is never the answer” wrong. sometimes it is ¯\_(ツ)_/ “
"the world is burning and it’s very clear who’s holding the matches”
thought it was a one-off thing, but i’ve now seen multiple pictures and videos of red-bellied woodpeckers touching other birds with their tongue at bird feeders. why are they suck little freaks?
Ive seen people be like in modern fantasy like “oh the pritagonists can just look up spells on their phone how do you solve that”
Imma be honest most people who go on recipe websites and book every recipe they see don’t even use them lmao why would with be different
Given how terrible most recipe websites are i can only imagine how bad spell websites would be
Having to navigate someone’s entire life story of how they became a witch in order to get to the part where they actually talk about the gods-damned banishing ritual
the number of ‘easy 3 step spell to fly’ that at best do nothing, and have a good chance of doing something very bad to you is non zero
Three words “BuzzFeed Spell Hacks”
five minute witchcrafts
the scry guys
Actual good spellcasting instructions but in the comments there are folks given it low ratings because they completely substituted the components needed and their spell did something completely different
Oh this is actually an incredible urban fantasy worldbuilding thought. Love it.
my favourite variety of greentext (and honestly imageboard screencap in general) has to be kind where even factually and impartially recounting what anon was so mad about requires accepting a premise so strange that you’re basically writing out a passage from the modern day moralia
in this tale, anon has ascribed a great deal of masculine importance to the varieties of carp one chooses to keep in his cellar, and upon learning that his neighbours do not have basement carp (which it must be said was not the norm at the time, nor is
[Image ID: The Destiel confession meme edited so that Dean answers ‘There is an UK petition calling for trans people to be able self-identify their legal gender.’ to Cas’ 'I love you’. /End ID]
You can sign this petition if you are a British/UK citizen or resident.
A software tester walks into a bar. Runs into a bar. Crawls into a bar. Dances into a bar. Flies into a bar. Jumps into a bar. And orders: a beer. 2 beers. O beers. 99999999 beers. a lizard in a beer glass. -1 beer. “qwertyuiop” beers. Testing complete. A real customer walks into the bar and turns on a screen reader. The bar goes up in flames.
i view just enough horror and have poor enough visual processing that i legit thought this was a gore-drenched bedroom that i would nope the fuck out of
also tumblr is That Cunt and it’s scientifically proven by the fact it’s the universally agreed go-to place for thousands of ao3 users whenever ao3 is down. like people don’t go to instagram or tiktok or facebook or twitter or x or whatever to see if ao3 is down. tumblr is like ao3’s friendly next-door neighbor and we go to tumblr whenever ao3 is in distress. other social media platforms could never gain our trust and alliance
All k9 dogs are abused hands down if you post any pro k9 stuff on my dash you’re unfollowed I don’t care if we’ve been mutuals for years, you can claim to be anti-cop or a leftist or whatever but if you post k9 dogs with like “a good doggo! A good boy!” fuck off, if I lose followers over this then good riddance
It’s ALSO worth saying that police dogs serve a significant role in worsening police brutality. A dog trained to attack a human will maim them. A cop looses a police dog on someone, and that person is expected to peacefully cooperate while a dog is trying to tear their limbs off. It is very easy for those massive wounds to get infected. It is an absurd amount of violence. And beyond the initial attack, the fact that a “poor sweet innocent doggo” did this is used to excuse that brutality in court. Especially if the victim, panicking in the moment, lashed out at the dog. As this website has demonstrated many times, majority-white juries have more sympathies for injured dogs than the people of color who are most often victims of police brutality. So they’re not just systemic animal abuse, they’re also a tool for increased police brutality and to excuse
I don’t need therapy. I need my husband (archive of our own) to return from war (the server is currently down) and come home to his devoted wife (an ao3 user who was in the middle of reading a gay sex scene). it’s been almost two years (20 minutes) since he (ao3) has been taken from me
you can be peeling a boiled egg and think to yourself wow. that was so simple. and then you peel another one and it’s like being in the throes of war. shell everywhere. egg mangled. tears in your eyes. that’s how god keeps you humble
This was exactly what happened to me when I posted my cute tattoo of a caterpillar playing saxophone in the r/Jazz subreddit and I was massacred for being a poser, I was having a bad day already and the backlash to my post was so unexpected I deleted it and left the community, I’m not ashamed of my tattoo or anything, I was just too sensitive and anxious about my own life to be roasted about such a small thing by strangers (and they were validating each other in the replies) I was confused, how do that people could not realize what a weird reaction they were having to such a small thing… funny thing is I haven’t listen to jazz ever since
Don’t let those weirdos discourage you from a beautiful art form such as jazz. They’ll have a rude awakening once they have to communicate in real life with people or stay festering in a Reddit hellhole.
Thank you for the kind words, I saw you were interested in seeing the tattoo so here you go, those were the exact same pictures I posted on reddit, it was done by a professional using the stick and poke technique, so there was no machine involved, hope you like my little jazzy caterpillar!
I’m the guy in every movie who steals plot-important items from people’s pockets by bumping past them on the sidewalk. Yeabh that’s me. It’s a living
Yeah that’s someone else, great guy, we hook up sometimes (we’ll bump shoulders going opposite ways down the street and one of us will look down and realize their dick has been sucked).
can we explain to early-twenties autistic lgbt people that they . cant be saying these things. you cant be calling people ‘degens’ in your dni you cant do that. you cant do that man. can we do a history lesson. you cant do that
YOU CANT DO THAT MAN
“in defense of using the term degen, it’s generally applied to pedophiles” - conservative man who might actually shoot a trans woman if he saw one within 50 meters of his child, and also LGBT tumblr users who do not know things they should know
“No, see, I’m using a word the Nazis coined the political usage of, but in a woke way! When I say the word that means 'acting like a person of color (derogatory)’, I’m just trying to say that you’re acting like a stupid, violent rapist who isn’t as human as me, which isn’t fucked up at all! What do you mean I’m actually using it in exactly the same way the Nazis did and still do?! I MEEEEEEEAN it differently, though!”
can we explain to early-twenties autistic lgbt people that they . cant be saying these things. you cant be calling people ‘degens’ in your dni you cant do that. you cant do that man. can we do a history lesson. you cant do that
YOU CANT DO THAT MAN
“in defense of using the term degen, it’s generally applied to pedophiles” - conservative man who might actually shoot a trans woman if he saw one within 50 meters of his child, and also LGBT tumblr users who do not know things they should know
“No, see, I’m using a word the Nazis coined the political usage of, but in a woke way! When I say the word that means 'acting like a person of color (derogatory)’, I’m just trying to say that you’re acting like a stupid, violent rapist who isn’t as human as me, which isn’t fucked up at all! What do you mean I’m actually using it in exactly the same way the Nazis did and still do?! I MEEEEEEEAN it differently, though!”
When you are making a man (for a lover) in your làboratory, please remember to make him demisexual. We’ve had several escape recently and they are worse than tomcats in heat
