yourocdoeswhat:

yourocdoeswhat:

Me at age 8: I might not have any friends, but I can make imaginary friends with rich social lives to fill that hole. I bet when I’m older I’ll grow out of this. 

Me at age 20: I need to make another OC to try and simulate human connection or else I’m gonna lose my mind.

Hey guys are y’all okay

humanpeoplefanblog:

saw this amazing post but rbs got turned off so. get funged idiot

catasters:

jaqqqln:

sexhaver:

blessedbycoyotes:

pomme-poire-peche:

rocktopussy:

ravenlynclemens:

calvin and hobbes

“You misspelled Weltanschauung” is one of the funniest punchlines I’ve ever encountered.

Watterson commentary from the 10th Anniversary Book: “Calvin’s vocabulary puzzles some readers, but Calvin has never been a literal six-year-old. Cumbersome words are funny to me, and I like Calvin’s ability to precisely articulate stupid ideas.”

meepmoopmaap:

dreamvisiongirlfriend:

memory-is-treachery:

u heard him ladies

so many mornings I need Dionysus to do this for me

@bugwolfsstuff

toqiuh:

been reading bamsara’s TROD au and man do i love their dynamic

gutpuker:

gutpuker:

gutpuker:

begging ppl to recontextualize their understanding of the word “trauma” because its either “everything is trauma” or “you dont have trauma unless you witness a literal war otherwise its insulting to people with trauma disorders” and neither of those are right

it doesnt take a huge violent event for you to be scarred by something mentally and suffering from it. when people say “triggering content” or put up trigger warnings what they usually mean by that is that the content is “graphic”, “gorey”, “drastic”, and while yes, of course these could be huge triggers for people who have been in direct contact with violence, its a huge misunderstanding of the issue. you have no way to know what triggers someone personally. because trauma occurs when a person doesnt know how to cope with something and resolve it emotionally, what is traumatic depends more on the individual than the stimuli in question. multiple people could experience the same event and only one develop ptsd for example. its an undoing of a persons internal sense of safety and belief system. because of that a trigger can be a sound, sensation, even certain phrases or words. its irresponsible to pretend otherwise.

case in point: complex post traumatic stress disorder, a disorder which is caused by a long lasting trauma due to things like abuse and being held captive. it doesnt take one singular drastic event for it to develop, it just does because youre mentally carrying a sense of danger wherever you go.

gutpuker:

gutpuker:

gutpuker:

begging ppl to recontextualize their understanding of the word “trauma” because its either “everything is trauma” or “you dont have trauma unless you witness a literal war otherwise its insulting to people with trauma disorders” and neither of those are right

it doesnt take a huge violent event for you to be scarred by something mentally and suffering from it. when people say “triggering content” or put up trigger warnings what they usually mean by that is that the content is “graphic”, “gorey”, “drastic”, and while yes, of course these could be huge triggers for people who have been in direct contact with violence, its a huge misunderstanding of the issue. you have no way to know what triggers someone personally. because trauma occurs when a person doesnt know how to cope with something and resolve it emotionally, what is traumatic depends more on the individual than the stimuli in question. multiple people could experience the same event and only one develop ptsd for example. its an undoing of a persons internal sense of safety and belief system. because of that a trigger can be a sound, sensation, even certain phrases or words. its irresponsible to pretend otherwise.

case in point: complex post traumatic stress disorder, a disorder which is caused by a long lasting trauma due to things like abuse and being held captive. it doesnt take one singular drastic event for it to develop, it just does because youre mentally carrying a sense of danger wherever you go.

autism-official:

dolce-cerise:

thebestworstidea:

tricky-pockets:

anexperimentallife:

seems like there’s a whole genre of:

society: autistic people fundamentally don’t comprehend [x]

autistic people: no, I get it, I’m just Not Gonna Do It

just because I understand doesn’t mean that I agree

LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK

Official autistic post.

cognitohazardous:

we all have that one knight homie whos always swearing fealty to any lady they meet

sacred-portal:

writerxwren:

honeybee2807:

Was scrolling through AO3 and found this gem

Enemy to parent is a trope we have to popularise lmao

Crosshair and Omega core

drarryking:

weaver-z:

Every romance book promoted on tiktok is just full to the brim with horrible “steamy” taglines that are just like… Eyes on me, Little Beast. I’m here to make you Damp

inthefallofasparrow:

thesentdowngirl-deactivated2023:

All time

xiaq:

xiaq:

When you only have 4 Tupperware containers and the 3 smaller ones are in the freezer, the avocado gets the penthouse suite.

Why is there a sudden influx of people reblogging this post about an avocado I made 5 years ago?? How do you explain shit like this to the folks from Meta/Twitter??

shes-imperfect-but-she-tries:

20xbetterthanu:

impatentpending:

khadij-al-kubra:

amuseoffyre:

captainlordauditor:

ailorian:

steakplissken:

adrianainthesnow:

syrupie:

nitrosplicer:

mmmm-books:

Can’t believe Jane Austen wrote Pride and Prejudice in the 2000s

And in 2015 Emily Brontë released literary clsssic Wuthering Heights

Thank God someone paved the way for them…

if you think jk was the first woman author, you don’t actually care about women authors.

Mary Shelley didnt fuck on her parents graves for this level of disrespect

Murasaki Shikibu didn’t invent the novel for this.

Christine de Pizan did not sit down at her desk and write The Book of the City of Ladies, advocating for women’s education and finding value in women of all social classes and backgrounds, in 1405 for this.

🎶SHAHARIZADE HAD A THOUSAND TALES🎶

This……….isn’t even true in 20th century fantasy or childrens books? Pierce, Lackey, Applegate, McCaffrey, Bradley, Butler, whomst?

Casual reminder that

• a woman was the first known author/poet in 2300BC - Enheduanna
• the first novel in recorded history was written by a woman in 1010AD - Murasaki Shikibu
• the earliest example of science fiction was written by a woman in 1666 - Margaret Cavendish
  
• horror science fiction was popularised by a teenage girl in 1818 - Mary Shelley
• a Scotswoman expanded childrens’ stories from moralising tales into anarchic adventures in the mid 1800s, well before it became popular in the early 20th century - Catherine Sinclair
  
• the masked/costumed hero archetype that inspired Batman and Zorro was created by a woman in 1905 - Baroness Emma Orczy
• And while she is problematic as all get out, we all know who is to blame for popularising Boarding School fiction (which is a huge inspiration of She Who Must Not Be Named) from the 1930s onwards - Enid Blyton
  

And do I even need to mention what a badass pioneer Ursula Le Guin was for women author in the fantasy/sci-fi genre?

Not to mention Agatha Christie is literally second only to Shakespeare in terms of works sold – 4 billion compared to JKR’s paltry 500 million 

Mary Shelly did what

Mary.Shelly.Lost.Her.Virginity.On.Her.Parent’s.Grave.

shes-imperfect-but-she-tries:

20xbetterthanu:

impatentpending:

khadij-al-kubra:

amuseoffyre:

captainlordauditor:

ailorian:

steakplissken:

adrianainthesnow:

syrupie:

nitrosplicer:

mmmm-books:

Can’t believe Jane Austen wrote Pride and Prejudice in the 2000s

And in 2015 Emily Brontë released literary clsssic Wuthering Heights

Thank God someone paved the way for them…

if you think jk was the first woman author, you don’t actually care about women authors.

Mary Shelley didnt fuck on her parents graves for this level of disrespect

Murasaki Shikibu didn’t invent the novel for this.

Christine de Pizan did not sit down at her desk and write The Book of the City of Ladies, advocating for women’s education and finding value in women of all social classes and backgrounds, in 1405 for this.

🎶SHAHARIZADE HAD A THOUSAND TALES🎶

This……….isn’t even true in 20th century fantasy or childrens books? Pierce, Lackey, Applegate, McCaffrey, Bradley, Butler, whomst?

Casual reminder that

• a woman was the first known author/poet in 2300BC - Enheduanna
• the first novel in recorded history was written by a woman in 1010AD - Murasaki Shikibu
• the earliest example of science fiction was written by a woman in 1666 - Margaret Cavendish
  
• horror science fiction was popularised by a teenage girl in 1818 - Mary Shelley
• a Scotswoman expanded childrens’ stories from moralising tales into anarchic adventures in the mid 1800s, well before it became popular in the early 20th century - Catherine Sinclair
  
• the masked/costumed hero archetype that inspired Batman and Zorro was created by a woman in 1905 - Baroness Emma Orczy
• And while she is problematic as all get out, we all know who is to blame for popularising Boarding School fiction (which is a huge inspiration of She Who Must Not Be Named) from the 1930s onwards - Enid Blyton
  

And do I even need to mention what a badass pioneer Ursula Le Guin was for women author in the fantasy/sci-fi genre?

Not to mention Agatha Christie is literally second only to Shakespeare in terms of works sold – 4 billion compared to JKR’s paltry 500 million 

Mary Shelly did what

Mary.Shelly.Lost.Her.Virginity.On.Her.Parent’s.Grave.

vampirekill3r:

goodnight:) <- my goodnight hat

theehorsepusssy:

Kudryashov Daniil

thememedaddy:

very-gay-alkyrion:

1hoverman0k:

guy with 60hz monitor: i am enjoying playing this game

guy with 240hz monitor: Honestly if you were to conceive of the most efficient possible torture in terms of purely causing agony for as long as possible and also have your firstborn son killed in front of you during the torture it would not even be a tenth as bad as playing a game at 60 fps

Guy with a laptop: Yeah I’m happy if it runs at 20 fps

therottenkingsreckoning:

charlesoberonn:

also, as has been pointed out, all fetuses technically start out female before the Y chromosome is activated around 6-8 weeks in. So if we were to go by the first section of this definition, then all men are trans

foxglovedforest:

AND THEY’RE FUCKING CORRECT

enbnonsense:

I love you time theft I love you long breaks I love you wasting time in the bathroom I love you texting on the clock

guerrillatech:

kosmogrl:

faggotstump:

faggotstump:

Discord servers are outside of my natural habitat so I’m never sure of what to do when I’m in one

what if I interrupt something. What if someone kills me.

gayserblast:

tangledbeast:

sacred-portal:

If it makes you feel any better, he hated it too.

ALT

This is the funniest and saddest sentence I’ve read all week

milfronin-archive:

bisexual-engineer-guy:

official-penis-posts:

proudaussieboomer1957:

threeunrelateddescriptors:

foldingfittedsheets:

I did find another sex shop story in my mind vault! Get ready for the most embarrassed I ever got at work.

When I first started my manager was this really cool guy and he set a matter-of-fact no nonsense tone to working there that I emulated. So as part of my training he brought me to a display case full of glass toys.

These are stunning solid glass pieces that just so happen to be shaped into gentle curves. Honestly several were abstract and beautiful enough to be displayed on a mantelpiece. They can be used with any kind of lube, they’re easy to sterilize and overall they’re excellent sex toys.

But I, like every other person, am the culmination of my lived experience. Glass breaks. I know this to be true, I’ve dropped glasses and plates and the fear of glass breaking was all I could see looking into that display.

My manager was well aware. He calmly informed me that I was looking at triple fired borosilicate and he pulled one out and banged it on the counter with all his might making me jump ten feet in the air. But there was the glass toy, triumphant and unscathed in his hand, after leaving a new dent on the counter. Forget sex, these things were viable murder weapons.

Over the years I worked there I did the exact same demo he did hundreds of times, smacking the solid glass onto the unyielding counter and showing off how sturdy the glass was. “Theres nothing your vagina can do to harm this,” I’d assure people.

So one day I had a group of three ladies looking at them, tittering nervously to each other. I assured them that these were extremely safe and they smiled skeptically.

“Really,” I said, pulling out an example, “our bodies are soft and wet, we have no way of damaging these.” I lifted it and brought it down onto the counter like I had a thousand times before. Like I’d seen countless times from my coworkers.

Except this time. The toy decided it must give up its grip on the mortal coil. It rebelled against its treatment of smacking the counter with a display of explosive protest. It shattered.

The women screamed and flinched back as I stood frozen in absolute perplexity as my mind tried to make sense of what had just happened. The toy had broken in huge safety glass sized chunks, leaving me a nub in my grip while it’s former glory lay in pieces all around me.

I looked back up at the ladies, speechless. They all broke into hysterical laughter. “Your face!” They gasped while clutching each other to stay on their feet.

“I- I’ve done this demo hundreds of times- it’s- it’s never broken!”

They crowed even harder as I sweeped up the mess, still in disbelief and horror at what I’d done. “Well. I at least know your bodies can’t provide that much force to a toy… I can’t believe this, it’s never broken before.” I babbled on in embarrassment to their obvious disbelief.

They looked back at me with the certainty of three women who will never in their life trust a glass toy not to shatter inside their bodies after watching the worlds most explosive demo.

I love this story because it is a hilarious and fantastic demonstration of a concept I must routinely explain to people when they hire me to do inspections: Objects don’t heal.

This isn’t a slight to anyone, it’s just that I run into this constantly and it is so so important to remember, when it’s involves things that are not the power of a vaginal spasm versus triple fired borosilicate sex toys.

Like whenever someone says “this was built to last”
Yes - true, but, it does not heal. If you do not inspect and maintain said thing (e.g., an I-beam clamp), one day the exact same force you have applied to it for the past X years will cause it to fail.

Sometimes in spectacular (read: catastrophic) fashion. Other times in mildly annoying ways.

People - remember this story. Remember how funny it is because no one got hurt [besides OP’s pride] and how novel due to the setting, and remember the lesson: Objects don’t heal.

OP I truly appreciate your recollection. Even if the reason the toy broke was because of the *exact* *precise* angle of force applied that one time, it may still stick in someone’s mind that they need to inspect their hardware / software (or call someone in to inspect it).

Demonstrating load cycling at the dildo display

We love a dildo story with a lesson at the end

cyclical loading fatigue failure dildo problem in Shigleys when

bisexual-engineer-guy:

official-penis-posts:

proudaussieboomer1957:

threeunrelateddescriptors:

foldingfittedsheets:

I did find another sex shop story in my mind vault! Get ready for the most embarrassed I ever got at work.

When I first started my manager was this really cool guy and he set a matter-of-fact no nonsense tone to working there that I emulated. So as part of my training he brought me to a display case full of glass toys.

These are stunning solid glass pieces that just so happen to be shaped into gentle curves. Honestly several were abstract and beautiful enough to be displayed on a mantelpiece. They can be used with any kind of lube, they’re easy to sterilize and overall they’re excellent sex toys.

But I, like every other person, am the culmination of my lived experience. Glass breaks. I know this to be true, I’ve dropped glasses and plates and the fear of glass breaking was all I could see looking into that display.

My manager was well aware. He calmly informed me that I was looking at triple fired borosilicate and he pulled one out and banged it on the counter with all his might making me jump ten feet in the air. But there was the glass toy, triumphant and unscathed in his hand, after leaving a new dent on the counter. Forget sex, these things were viable murder weapons.

Over the years I worked there I did the exact same demo he did hundreds of times, smacking the solid glass onto the unyielding counter and showing off how sturdy the glass was. “Theres nothing your vagina can do to harm this,” I’d assure people.

So one day I had a group of three ladies looking at them, tittering nervously to each other. I assured them that these were extremely safe and they smiled skeptically.

“Really,” I said, pulling out an example, “our bodies are soft and wet, we have no way of damaging these.” I lifted it and brought it down onto the counter like I had a thousand times before. Like I’d seen countless times from my coworkers.

Except this time. The toy decided it must give up its grip on the mortal coil. It rebelled against its treatment of smacking the counter with a display of explosive protest. It shattered.

The women screamed and flinched back as I stood frozen in absolute perplexity as my mind tried to make sense of what had just happened. The toy had broken in huge safety glass sized chunks, leaving me a nub in my grip while it’s former glory lay in pieces all around me.

I looked back up at the ladies, speechless. They all broke into hysterical laughter. “Your face!” They gasped while clutching each other to stay on their feet.

“I- I’ve done this demo hundreds of times- it’s- it’s never broken!”

They crowed even harder as I sweeped up the mess, still in disbelief and horror at what I’d done. “Well. I at least know your bodies can’t provide that much force to a toy… I can’t believe this, it’s never broken before.” I babbled on in embarrassment to their obvious disbelief.

They looked back at me with the certainty of three women who will never in their life trust a glass toy not to shatter inside their bodies after watching the worlds most explosive demo.

I love this story because it is a hilarious and fantastic demonstration of a concept I must routinely explain to people when they hire me to do inspections: Objects don’t heal.

This isn’t a slight to anyone, it’s just that I run into this constantly and it is so so important to remember, when it’s involves things that are not the power of a vaginal spasm versus triple fired borosilicate sex toys.

Like whenever someone says “this was built to last”
Yes - true, but, it does not heal. If you do not inspect and maintain said thing (e.g., an I-beam clamp), one day the exact same force you have applied to it for the past X years will cause it to fail.

Sometimes in spectacular (read: catastrophic) fashion. Other times in mildly annoying ways.

People - remember this story. Remember how funny it is because no one got hurt [besides OP’s pride] and how novel due to the setting, and remember the lesson: Objects don’t heal.

OP I truly appreciate your recollection. Even if the reason the toy broke was because of the *exact* *precise* angle of force applied that one time, it may still stick in someone’s mind that they need to inspect their hardware / software (or call someone in to inspect it).

Demonstrating load cycling at the dildo display

We love a dildo story with a lesson at the end

cyclical loading fatigue failure dildo problem in Shigleys when

tenmyoujump:

yourlocal-charlatan:

narwhalsarefalling:

narwhalsarefalling:

narwhalsarefalling:

lol i went to delete a twitter account for reasons (i ran a satire account of my university’s president) and it wouldn’t let me.

EXCELLENT idea give me a moment

wow i can’t believe that worked

[Image ID: the first image is a screenshot of a tag that says #turn it into a musk parody account and get it banned

The second image is a screenshot of the now-suspended account. /end ID]

for reference: the time between “turn into musk parody account” and “suspended” was 8 minutes

jaydove-writes:

teaboot:

kosmogrl:

well yes!

I’m sorry, you don’t know WHY??

Like to charge, reblog to cast

post-uwuifier:

sillycourtjester:

post-uwuifier:

geryone:

anyone else 1 situation away from losing their mind

anypony ewse 1 situwuation away fwom wosing deiw mind UwU

This post has been UwU-ified!

post-uwuifier is already there. Been through multiple situations, mind lost long time ago, and is the example left behind. How does it feel

wife is suffewing and agony beyond compawe!! UwU

rainbow-taishi:

Silly concept:

Imagine an isekai language learning app about a character who uses multilingual phrases as spells to fight off evil forces but got their abilities sealed so you as the player (as them) have to ’re-learn’ it by retracing your journey across different regions 😂

rainbow-taishi:

Silly concept:

Imagine an isekai language learning app about a character who uses multilingual phrases as spells to fight off evil forces but got their abilities sealed so you as the player (as them) have to ’re-learn’ it by retracing your journey across different regions 😂

xrd:

Huh?

unpeeled-human:

FROM THIS

eggblackoutpoetry:

papayajuan2019:

there’s a new social cue coming out. no we’re not telling you about it

depressed-cryptid:

lagtrainzzz:

ave-aria:

professional-dog-hugger:

callout posts in 2014: this user is sending mean messages to people! please be warned!

callout posts in 2015: this user is stealing bones from cemeteries for witch rituals!

callout posts in 2016: this user Actually A Nazi

callout posts in 2017: this user watches an anime I don’t like

callout posts in 2018: i went through this user’s youtube like history and found a video from JonTron that they liked in 2012, proving that they’re a bad person

callout posts in 2019: this user plays E-Rated Video Games, which are meant for children, which seems pretty sus to me idk :/

callout posts in 2020: this user stole 5 gallons of purified water from the New DC Resistance Camp and was last seen headed towards Sunken Brooklyn

what I REALLY don’t like is this post was made in 2017

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

cryptotheism:

la-principessa-nuova:

la-principessa-nuova:

piendish:

Reblong to give someone an ice cream sanditch.

Reblong?

depressed-cryptid:

lagtrainzzz:

ave-aria:

professional-dog-hugger:

callout posts in 2014: this user is sending mean messages to people! please be warned!

callout posts in 2015: this user is stealing bones from cemeteries for witch rituals!

callout posts in 2016: this user Actually A Nazi

callout posts in 2017: this user watches an anime I don’t like

callout posts in 2018: i went through this user’s youtube like history and found a video from JonTron that they liked in 2012, proving that they’re a bad person

callout posts in 2019: this user plays E-Rated Video Games, which are meant for children, which seems pretty sus to me idk :/

callout posts in 2020: this user stole 5 gallons of purified water from the New DC Resistance Camp and was last seen headed towards Sunken Brooklyn

what I REALLY don’t like is this post was made in 2017

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

I am OBSESSED with people telling me how they met the love of their life. Just found out my director met his wife through a misdirected email - that’s fate right there.

“I saw her last name was Jewish - and I’m Jewish, so when I corrected the email I told her Shabbat Shalom with a smiley face — this was the very beginning of the emoticon era, you understand. She had a watermark of a dog rescue at the bottom of her email, and I love dogs, so I found her website and there she was — all these videos of her rehabilitating dogs and talking about the organization. I fell in love with her just from those videos.”

😭😭😭

“I asked if we could meet for coffee, told her I was looking for volunteer opportunities — which was halfway a lie — and she said ‘okay, but just so you know I have a boyfriend, so this is strictly business,’ and I was so disappointed, but I did want to meet her. We sat in that coffeeshop until they turned the lights out on us, and she broke up with her boyfriend the next day.”

MULTIPLE people in the notes have told me how important these tags are to them so here’s to keeping it in the main post.

xx-emowarz-xx:

People don’t actually grow out of their emo phases. People are forced out of their emo phases by employers who get a raging boner over controlling how their employees dress, cut their hair, whether they mod their bodies and so on

rocketbirdie:

easy. lmao