“interesting that OP blocked me instead of respond to my point 🤔” curious that the Dave & Busters has requested i leave after shitting my pants on the DDR. could they be feeling a bit owned perchance?
“interesting that OP blocked me instead of respond to my point 🤔” curious that the Dave & Busters has requested i leave after shitting my pants on the DDR. could they be feeling a bit owned perchance?
I just had a truly horrible realization. I was talking about the worldbuilding in fma with someone the other day, and they mistakenly said it took place during the Victorian era, or Amestris’s equivilant to it.
I, being a lover of fashion history as well as an insufferable pedant, corrected them by saying that both the year(s) it takes place in as well as many of the technological and cultural influences seen in the world are actually more in line with the subsequent, much shorter era known as the…
the Edwardian era.
God fucking dammit.
of course it’s a much shorter era.
Fun fact: the Edwardian Era is so short that, unless you’re one of those people who extends it 4 years past the reign of the king it’s named after, it’s not even a decade long, making it possibly the shortest historical era in all of British history
I did find another sex shop story in my mind vault! Get ready for the most embarrassed I ever got at work.
When I first started my manager was this really cool guy and he set a matter-of-fact no nonsense tone to working there that I emulated. So as part of my training he brought me to a display case full of glass toys.
These are stunning solid glass pieces that just so happen to be shaped into gentle curves. Honestly several were abstract and beautiful enough to be displayed on a mantelpiece. They can be used with any kind of lube, they’re easy to sterilize and overall they’re excellent sex toys.
But I, like every other person, am the culmination of my lived experience. Glass breaks. I know this to be true, I’ve dropped glasses and plates and the fear of glass breaking was all I could see looking into that display.
My manager was well aware. He calmly informed me that I was looking at triple fired borosilicate and he pulled one out and banged it on the counter with all his might making me jump ten feet in the air. But there was the glass toy, triumphant and unscathed in his hand, after leaving a new dent on the counter. Forget sex, these things were viable murder weapons.
Over the years I worked there I did the exact same demo he did hundreds of times, smacking the solid glass onto the unyielding counter and showing off how sturdy the glass was. “Theres nothing your vagina can do to harm this,” I’d assure people.
So one day I had a group of three ladies looking at them, tittering nervously to each other. I assured them that these were extremely safe and they smiled skeptically.
“Really,” I said, pulling out an example, “our bodies are soft and wet, we have no way of damaging these.” I lifted it and brought it down onto the counter like I had a thousand times before. Like I’d seen countless times from my coworkers.
Except this time. The toy decided it must give up its grip on the mortal coil. It rebelled against its treatment of smacking the counter with a display of explosive protest. It shattered.
The women screamed and flinched back as I stood frozen in absolute perplexity as my mind tried to make sense of what had just happened. The toy had broken in huge safety glass sized chunks, leaving me a nub in my grip while it’s former glory lay in pieces all around me.
I looked back up at the ladies, speechless. They all broke into hysterical laughter. “Your face!” They gasped while clutching each other to stay on their feet.
“I- I’ve done this demo hundreds of times- it’s- it’s never broken!”
They crowed even harder as I sweeped up the mess, still in disbelief and horror at what I’d done. “Well. I at least know your bodies can’t provide that much force to a toy… I can’t believe this, it’s never broken before.” I babbled on in embarrassment to their obvious disbelief.
They looked back at me with the certainty of three women who will never in their life trust a glass toy not to shatter inside their bodies after watching the worlds most explosive demo.
I love this story because it is a hilarious and fantastic demonstration of a concept I must routinely explain to people when they hire me to do inspections: Objects don’t heal.
This isn’t a slight to anyone, it’s just that I run into this constantly and it is so so important to remember, when it’s involves things that are not the power of a vaginal spasm versus triple fired borosilicate sex toys.
Like whenever someone says “this was built to last” Yes - true, but, it does not heal. If you do not inspect and maintain said thing (e.g., an I-beam clamp), one day the exact same force you have applied to it for the past X years will cause it to fail.
Sometimes in spectacular (read: catastrophic) fashion. Other times in mildly annoying ways.
People - remember this story. Remember how funny it is because no one got hurt [besides OP’s pride] and how novel due to the setting, and remember the lesson: Objects don’t heal.
OP I truly appreciate your recollection. Even if the reason the toy broke was because of the *exact* *precise* angle of force applied that one time, it may still stick in someone’s mind that they need to inspect their hardware / software (or call someone in to inspect it).
Demonstrating load cycling at the dildo display
We love a dildo story with a lesson at the end
cyclical loading fatigue failure dildo problem in Shigleys when
gaining followers pretty fast and that should not be happening i think. tumblr have some restraint. youre embarassing us
tumblr please. we have guests. control urself
oh shit those ARE the guests. hot damn. will have to contemplate this
Hello tumblr new arrivals! welcome, it is so good to have you here, some tips before we get started! u are coming across as, (what is colloquially known as,) “desperate,”
every time i remember this video exists im not even exaggerating when i say i wheeze until i cant breathe its the fuckijgn funniest thing in thw world to me it gives me a migraine every time i watch it
I saw some James Webb Telescope scientists give a talk and one of them said this was her favorite image because she had waited and worked 25 years to see this.
[Begin ID. Image 1. Tweet by Latest in space (@ latestinspace) on September 21, 2022 at 9:34 AM. James Webb telescope just dropped its latest image, Neptune, and its rings.
The other two images are from the post’s attachments.
Image 2. Outer space with colorful stars and galaxies. Neptune is far away, yet close enough that it’s rings are visible. The planet is a shining purplish white.
Image 3. Closeup of Neptune. It glows brightly against the black of space. Neptune is pale lavender. It has bands of white spots that have a hint of gold. Its five rings are white. Two rings are clearly visible. End ID.]
GET. AI. OUT. OF. FANDOM. Stop making headcanons with it, stop making fanfic with it, stop making fanart with it. If I see one more “asking chatgpt *blank* about *character/characters in a fandom* I’m going to lose my goddamn mind. Use your own fucking brain, stop asking AI to do everything. You could even ask other real people what they think. Just. Stop. Using. AI. In. Creative. Spaces.
for headcanons just use a random headcanon generator or something
Or
Get this
Use your *head* to *make up* headcanons just like you’re supposed to.
yeah i meant if you’re completely stuck. but if you can just think of you’re own
If you are completely stuck ask another person
that too
i think @the-rodgud meant was more like the ones with a million pre written ones and it’s randomly chosen:p
If I see one more naive white queer speaking over actual Chinese queers people and proclaiming xiaohongshu/rednote or even China in general is somehow a fucking wonderland incapable of violent bigotry I’m gonna explode
1) a lot of the queer related tags have suddenly become usable again after the great migration
2) the #le tag for lesbians literally comes from the #lesbian and #les tags being banned so to act
3) the welcome you’re receiving by chinese people isn’t what actual Chinese queers have experienced (we experience a bombardment of loud angry homophobes/transphobes every single fucking day) and every single Chinese queer I know has been ranting about this for days. Unfortunately a lot of people are hypocrites who are only nice to the guests in the house
4) not only is this rhetoric of don’t ask don’t tell being the main consensus in China FALSE (I don’t even want to get into the media’s suppression of hate crimes and how many queer activism accounts are being banned left and right), passive queerphobia is still FUCKING QUEERPHOBIA…
The audacity to come into OUR HOUSE and speak over us after 3 days of being pampered on this app just for being western is vile and so fucking demoralising because we’ve been yelling about our condition for so long and you guys would rather not miss out on social media brainrot than to actually apply some nuance for once… you guys wanted to distance from the sinophobic propaganda take of China being unequivocally evil so bad that you’ve swung to the other end
It recently became department policy to purchase all our animal care supplies online and have them shipped, but my work location (public park) doesn’t have a mailbox, so we’ve been getting things shipped directly to the post office. Today I went to pick up a shipment of several hundred superworms but the postal workers are insisting that it’s not possible to have packages shipped directly to the post office. I gave them a tracking number which revealed they were delivered a couple days ago and now they’re looking for them. Somewhere in the post office are 500 lost worms.
I can’t believe the post office lost my worms
Update: they found my worms!!!!
ALT
The postal worker put these in front of me like she was delivering a bomb.
Honestly I can’t blame the postal worker; my advisor lost his grub ordering privileges after he failed to pick up a delivery from the front desk on time and they all hatched and escaped.
They told me not to have live bugs designated as Hold For Pickup anymore :(
ALT
I’m sorry you lost your 2,000 crickets but knowing the thief probably unleashed thousands of crickets inside their house or car is the kind of thing everyone who’s had a package stolen dreams of.
fun thing about herding and/or generally neurotic breeds: they are really good at following rules you have instituted, but they will also make their own Dog Rules they will follow stringently whether or not you like it
despite never being reprimanded for getting sick if my dog throws up she will ‘tattle’ on herself and run over to me, show me the throw up, then hide and start shaking uncontrollably. nobody taught her to do this. she has decided that throwing up is a punishable offense until the end of time
my dog has decided that it’s solely on her shoulders to ensure there is peace in my house…if the cats fight she stands between them to ‘break it up’ and/or herds them away, if my rats have an argument she goes to the cage door and barks until they stop. not sure why she has decided she must carry the weight of the world but she has
The fact that “Elon musk does two Nazi salutes” isn’t blowing up my push notifications is the best example I could possibly give of the media’s failure to do fucking anything
Very bold of PBS to call it like it is on Twitter of all places
Love is an observable force, evil is an illness to be cured, light will pour from the sun long after we need it, I have a gun and I swear to GOD I’m not fucking around
Love is an observable force, evil is an illness to be cured, light will pour from the sun long after we need it, I have a gun and I swear to GOD I’m not fucking around
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