imagine if your cool mutual shared her youtube channel (which you didn’t know she had) with you once just during a random conversation and you saw it was full of videos like “Tumblr Mutual Tier List” or “Friends-Only Discord Server Tier List” or “Me & 2 Oomfs Rank Friend Combinations In Voice Calls From Worst To Best”
“i am a monument to all your sins” is such a fucking raw line for a villain it’s amazing that it came from halo, a modernish video game, and not some classical text or mythos
classic texts have nothing on the crazy people come up with in modern times tbh
“I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.”
– Joshua Graham, Who Is A Fallout New Vegas NPC, Something Most People Throwing This Quote Around Don’t Realize
“If the world chooses to become my enemy, I will fight like I always have.”
– Shadow the Hedgehog in what is widely considered one of if not the single worst game in the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise
this is the source for this text and it haunts me on a regular basis
“Pick a god and pray.”
-Fredrick from Fire Emblem Awakening
Huh, it’s almost like art isn’t just fine art…
this is my addition to this ever growing list of raw quotes originating from unexpected sources
also “you’re not brave, you’ve merely forgotten the fear of death. Allow me to reacquaint you.” Is the rawest line and it’s from dominus ghaul from destiny 2’s vanilla story when it first released.
How can we forget the quote that sums up this entire reblog chain:
Why do you people feel profound thought has to come from high places? The gutter looks at the stars too
“Spare me this mockery of justice!”
(A few minutes later, a with a different character)
“Silence! Or you shall be held in contempt of court!” “I have nothing *but* contempt for this court!”
The Transformers: The Movie (1986)
“For every kid that dreams up the electric lightbulb, there’s one who dreams up the atom bomb.” - Mr. Electric, The Adventures of Sharkboy And Lavagirl (2005).
“I like turtles!” - turtle kid
“If the sea were of ink and the sky parchment I could not begin to write my love for you.”
Grandma Arbuckle reading a love letter in A Garfield Christmas.
Grandma Arbuckle
reading a love letter in
A Garfield Christmas.
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
Looking into early human migrations and learning that all blonde hair came from this one group near lake baikal, really making me wonder what other human traits there could have been that simply ceased to exist in the late palaeolithic
Looking into early human migrations and learning that all blonde hair came from this one group near lake baikal, really making me wonder what other human traits there could have been that simply ceased to exist in the late palaeolithic
bastille has done more for the queer community by just making all of their love songs about “you” instead of specifying a gender than taylor swift has in all of her discography. thanks for coming to my ted talk.
this post is VERY funny bc it has a fuck ton of likes and like. two reblogs. the fear of the wrath of the swifties is VISCERAL.
“My first language has a perfect saying for this, but it doesn’t make sense in english :(”
Say it anyway! You don’t owe them perfect clarity. Be profoundly cryptic, speak in riddles, make them ponder what the fuck you meant by that. The anglos, like porridge, must sometimes be stirred, so they don’t burn stuck on the bottom of the pot.
“If I were you, I’d spit on the floor and swim away”
“If my grandmother had two wheels she’d be a bycicle”
“You could scare a popcorn ready
"Uglier than hitting your mom.”
“If you get up from the casket, the funeral ends”
“Jumping over the mental hospital wall with the gates wide open”
“Clapping for a lunatic’s dance”
And if English speakers like it enough (or enough use it) it will be adopted (& probably mangled). Cause the English language is like that.
I’m personally a fan of “a hungry person has bread on their mind” (głodnemu chleb na myśli) and “even Salomon won’t pour from an empty [cup]” (z pustego i Salomon nie naleje)
the first one is most frequently used in case of Freudian Slips, as a joke; the second is used when you’re asked to do something without the necessary equipment
The ones I miss the most when speaking English or German are “It’s enough to paste [person] behind the wallpaper” (je zou [persoon] toch achter het behang plakken" and “I’ll just chase a piglet up a tree for you then” (‘k zal veur ei es e kurreke oewp nen boewm jage zelle).
First one is for when someone has fucked up spectacularly and below any measure of common sense. The second one is when someone is asking for either the impossible, or far more than they’re entitled to ask.
One of my favourite Irish sayings translates to “many a time a man’s mouth broke his nose” for when you just want people to shut the everlasting fuck up and I use it almost daily
My favourite Portuguese saying is ‘maior e vacinado’, means ‘of age and vaccinated’. Essentially if someone is doing something stupid, you say ‘well, they’re old enough to know better/figure it out’
Also like ‘se a minha avó não tivesse morrido, estaria viva’, ‘if my grandmother hadn’t died, she’d be alive’
When I was little I had an irrational fear of when you tried to turn off your Windows XP and the screen would gradually turn Grey as you choose which power option to enter
i love you USPS I love you NASA i love you taxpayer funded services that actually contribute positively to society i love you libraries i love you public transport
Published in “Transvestia” magazine #38 (April 1966). I think original art could be by Bob Tupper.
not sure if anyone’s added this info here but because I wanted to know more I checked and….
Every issue of transvestia magazine, which ran from the 60’s through to the 80’s is available through the uVic archives. It was a groundbreaking publication for the crossdressing and later the transgender community. Check it out.
ppl are rlly trying to defend being on your phone during a movie in the theater what is going on
using your phone in a movie theater is a symptom of long covid
the defense of being on your phone in a movie theater is who cares? by your own admission, you should be paying attention to the movie. so why do you care what other people are doing? you’re meant to be paying attention to the movie.
“oh no, my audience has begun to guess the big twists of my story and are accurately predicting what will happen!”
incorrect response: write the rest of the story to be as twisty, shocking and counter to expectations as possible, regardless of whether this is a logical or satisfying way for the plot to go
correct response:
can someone elaborate on the “make hoax” and “post angry tweet about “leak”“ part. i’m stupid and don’t understand things
sure!
(you’re not stupid. I posted this thinking it would amuse a handful of mutuals who all knew the context and that would be about it, so I didn’t think about providing any other explanation. I had no idea it would spread this far.)
I’ll start from the very beginning just to be thorough. so this is Alex Hirsch, creator and head writer of Gravity Falls, a show which had a big focus on mystery, conspiracies, codes and ciphers, etc. the whole plot is kicked off by one of the main characters finding a mysterious old journal in the woods, which detailed all kinds of weird and supernatural things, but then ended abruptly with the author saying they had to hide the journal because they were being watched. the central driving mystery of the show, therefore, was the question of who wrote the journal and what happened to them.
now, the thing about Gravity Falls is that, while it must be said that the writers weren’t always quite as sure of their plans as we tend to like to think they are, it is very much a fair play mystery, with legitimate clues to what was going on. but the writers were caught off guard by how quickly the show attracted a dedicated audience, including a lot of people outside the primary presumed demographic, who started solving the clues faster than expected. so some of the fans were able to correctly guess who the author was before it was revealed in the show, and the theory started spreading. this put the writers in something of a panic, because this was THE mystery that the whole story revolved around, with ¾ of the show building up to the dramatic reveal in the middle of season 2. they wanted it to be a mystery that could be figured out, sure, but they weren’t prepared for people to solve it so far in advance of when it was planned to be revealed, which would have really taken away from the big moment. they weren’t going to change the main story itself, but having been caught unaware by how much attention the fans were paying, they wanted to up the ante and make the mystery more complex to solve going forward–but first they needed to buy some time and throw the fandom off the scent for a little longer.
hence, Alex’s plan as described above. they whipped up a fake shot that appears to give away the identity of the author as being another character in the show, put it on a screen in the studio as if it was a real animation frame, took a picture of it, and ‘leaked’ it online. it was initially decided to be a hoax (albeit, I think, presumed to be a hoax originating from outside the production team), until Alex posted this tweet:
…before quickly deleting it (though not so quickly that it didn’t get seen, of course).
it worked well enough to distract most people for a while, and wasn’t revealed as a hoax until a year later, when an episode aired that definitively proved that the supposed screenshot could never have happened, at which point Alex owned up to the whole thing as seen in the tweet above. by then the episode with the real reveal wasn’t far off, and while people did still work it out ahead of time, it was more of an “OH MY GOD I KNEW IT!” moment than a “booooooring, we’ve known that for ages” moment, which of course was what the writers wanted all along.
personally I find this a fascinating approach to dealing with the problem of spoilers, because it doesn’t affect the story itself at all; if you watch Gravity Falls today–or if you were watching it when it aired without any significant contact with the fandom–you’d never know about it. ultimately, the problem the writers were facing wasn’t that some people might guess the answer to the mystery–they never wanted to make it completely impossible to predict–so much as it was that they hadn’t designed the story to stand up to so many people working on the puzzle together, which resulted in a sort of total output of puzzle-solving ability that far outstripped the capability of any one solo human being. so their solution is something that’s very much targeted toward delaying that group problem-solving, without actually affecting the experience of any individual person watching the show.
plus, it’s very in keeping with the overall tone of the show.
I ended up on r/ADHDparenting (a subreddit about parenting kids with ADHD, not about being a parent with ADHD) and Jesus fuck.
Imagine how much r/childfree hates kids, but the only people allowed to post in this sub are parents.
“My kindergartener asks me a ton of questions every morning i wish i could give her her meds while she was still asleep so that she would shut the fuck up by the time she’s awake”
“My 4-9 year old child is the most annoying person in the planet and I can’t wait until he’s old enough for a prescription because if he stays like this I’m just going to keep hating him.”
“If he’s too young for vyvanse start him on caffeine but no sugar! Half a can of diet cola with breakfast should be a good place to start.”
“I started giving my kid her meds before she gets out of bed so that they kick in by breakfast time and I don’t have to deal with her constant fidgeting and incessant talking.”
Look I do understand the need to vent but an entire subreddit that seems to confirm the worst things that kids with ADHD think of themselves (my parents hate me, I’m too annoying to love, nobody will like me if I don’t shut myself down, everyone thinks I’m loud and stupid and they laugh about me behind my back, my mom wishes i was like my brother, if they could flip a switch to make me into someone else they would, they would rather have any child but me, anybody would rather have any child but me) seems fucking ghastly. THIS is the kind of shit you put in a private discord server, c'mon.
ok but legitimately i think the reason why kids aren’t taking internet safety seriously is because the people who are telling us not to put our personal information out seem so out of touch. no one acknowledges the possibility of meeting very real teenaged friends online, they always say that everyone you meet is a 40 year old white man in disguise. because they aren’t acknowledging things we know are true, it becomes a lot easier to dismiss the rest of what they’re saying as well. internet safety lessons absolutely must keep up with the times and acknowledge the internet’s capacity for good if you want kids to take to heart warnings about its capacity for bad.
Some actual safety tips for teenagers:
1. Have proof they’re a teenager first. More than just a picture, have a video call with them.
2. If you want to meet up with them, have your parents or a trusted adult come with you. Even if they are a proven teenager, its still good to have supervision in case any issues happen.
3. If you are talking to an adult, and they start being sexual in any way, you run the fuck away. It doesn’t matter if they’re 40 or 20. An adult inherently has a power dynamic that teenagers do not. And its up to the adult to act responsible about it. There’s exceptions of course, if you’re 16 and dating an 18 year old, that’s not a problem, we’re not talking about that.
4. Being in a server with adults or ran by adults is not inherently bad. Talking to adults is not inherently a problem, and will likely happen in any number of Discord servers. It is only an issue when they are acting sexual and show predatory behavior.
5. Look out for grooming behavior. It can be difficult, because at first it seems like innocuous behavior, like complimenting or giving gifts. Especially if you feel lonely and have low self esteem. And groomers actively target people like that.
If they start trying to isolate you, talk sexual with you, state they depend on you for emotional needs, blame you for their own actions, try to be secretive about the relationship- Then you need to talk to people you trust, block the perpetrator, and call the police on them.
6. If this does happen to you, remember this: It is not your fault. Even if you didn’t listen to a single thing listed here, it is not your fault. It is the fault of the adults who knew better, and didn’t care. It’s not your fault.
To my followers: if any of you guys are underaged, please be very VERY careful on here, and don’t fall for any of the tricks the groomer would use on you, just block them and report them.
Specifically, to “swash a buckler” referred to the act of pounding a buckler (small shield) against one’s own chest as a sort of macho display.
Mmmm… close, but no cigar.
To “swash” is to make a noise by beating one’s sword against one’s shield (or against others’ swords). Via the OED (it’s definition #3 below):
And that “bucklers” are involved also tells you what kind of sword’s involved: not a big expensive longsword of one variety or another (for which you’d realistically need a way bigger shield for any kind of protection), but the shorter, lighter, cheaper weapons you might expect in back-alley street fighting among the (let’s all sneer decorously now) plebs and real-swordfighter-wannabes.
imagine if every chapter in a real book ended with an author’s note
“sorry guys i think that chapter kind of got away from me😅 if you see me projecting my own religious trauma onto these characters no you didn’t. but seriously that was more than 20 pages maybe i have issues lol… well the next one is a doozy. ivan will finally confront smerdyakov properly. stay tuned!”
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