it rly is weird how theres this culture in progressive spaces where like you can be as mean, as CRUEL even, as you want as long as youre not being explicitly bigoted towards any marginalized group of people and still be seen as a really good person with good morals who nobody is allowed to have beef with bc theyve never done anything racist or homophobic
politically correct behavior devoid of compassion for humanity as a whole is a callous performance and nothing more
it rly is weird how theres this culture in progressive spaces where like you can be as mean, as CRUEL even, as you want as long as youre not being explicitly bigoted towards any marginalized group of people and still be seen as a really good person with good morals who nobody is allowed to have beef with bc theyve never done anything racist or homophobic
politically correct behavior devoid of compassion for humanity as a whole is a callous performance and nothing more
as the time of the worst Halloween special ever approaches, make sure to start calling fellow transfems “pumpkin” to signal your intentions with them (if you don’t already)
As the spookiness surrounds us all it’s funny, all my followers start looking like pumpkins in need of their own worst Halloween special :3
Yesterday, I moderated this discussion with some Palestinians from the occupied west bank who have been resisting the zionists in their own little town. It was a strong mix of emotions to hear them speak - on one hand, very painful hear what they are put through daily, on the other, very invigorating to hear how much they value the protests in the universities to force them to divest. It is easy to fall into this trap of thinking “what are we doing apart from screaming free free Palestine??” But always remember that they are watching us, and if nothing else it gives them strength to see millions out there still supporting them.
If you’ve ever wondered how reposting hurts artists- yesterday I found a post from 2012ish featuring one of my Sherlock/Doctor Who pieces. That post had 17,604 notes. It wasn’t my post. My post of that art had 0 notes.
Apparently I saw the post once when it was at 6k because an artist I admired reblogged it, but at that stage I was very unwell & not experienced enough with Tumblr to realise what effect it might have.
Looking through the notes now I see that in the six years since then-
Several people got the design as a tattoo.
A number liked it enough to want custom designs but didn’t know how to contact me so that’s approximately £300 I didn’t get a chance to earn.
Someone used that art in the front cover of a comic by accident and while the company fixed it after I contacted them that’s exposure that it’s far too late to capitalise on now.
If you like an artwork that you find off tumblr, please, please I am begging you search for the artist’s name and see if they do actually have a Tumblr you could reblogged from instead. If you’re an artist search your username(s) every so often to see if your work has been taken.
A few hundred quid might not seem like a lot, but that’s a few months of income for me
Reminder to those new to tumblr that there is a difference between reposting and reblogging.
Reposting is where you save the image, make your own post, and share to others. Heavily frowned upon unless you 1. get permission from the artist and 2. still give proper credit to the artist. If the artist is off-tumbr and you want to share, again, GET PERMISSION FIRST! If they say no, oh well.
Reblogging is just using the reblog button (the button with the arrows) to share posts you see. In this case reblogging is actively encouraged because it can help spread the art of people you love while the artist still gets notes, views, and proper credit.
I swear the way that some people talk about AI on this site sounds like those hysterical posts about programming being satanic with screenshots of programs telling people to “kill child”
I swear the way that some people talk about AI on this site sounds like those hysterical posts about programming being satanic with screenshots of programs telling people to “kill child”
I was just thinking about the time I was at a queer group, waiting for it to start, and we were just casually chatting, talking about what we did over the weekend. I mentioned what my wife and I did. A younger woman scoffs and said “I hate when men say ‘my wife’. It’s like they think they own her.” I’m just standing there, confused, kind of expecting the other people around us to also be confused. But no, all the women started talking about how awful men are to their wives and how wives deserve better than straight men.
So now I’m super uncomfortable because we’re at a group for all types of queer people. Yall know I’m queer too and at groups like this, I try to make a point to queer it up because I’m safe to. We havent met, do you even know how I identify?
If you knew anything about me, you’d know that at the time my wife and I got married, marriage equality had only been legal for about a year. Legally, we were no different than any queer couple. We didn’t know that we’d be able to be legally married. At the time, I couldn’t legally change my gender marker in my state (the law at that point was you had to have 'irreversible surgery’ to change your gender marker). Just because I am a trans man does not mean that there was some switch that flipped and instantly put me on level playing field with cishet men.
I don’t know what made me think about this again. But that was a very uncomfortable experience for me. It was the last time I went to that group.
im a big scary meat beast that writhes and twitches and contorts in ways that make you ill to look at but im also squeamish and it makes me uncomfortable. its hard for us meat beast girls out here.ok.
girls go to college to get more knowledge. men go to svalbard to die in the polar night.
ALT
wait fr
ALT
oh my god
men when they die in svalbard
ALT
and waste fresh meat???
I didn’t think that it would be more wild, but it is. Terrifying.
Oh yes. The graveyard is quarantined.
Longyearbyen has some other nice laws, such as it being illegal to lock the doors of houses and cars (so that people can escape polar bears), or it being illegal to leave the town without firearms (so that people can defend themselves from polar bears.)
Is a pretty cool place.
So it’s not illegal to die there they just firmly prefer you try not to
girls go to college to get more knowledge. men go to svalbard to die in the polar night.
ALT
wait fr
ALT
oh my god
men when they die in svalbard
ALT
and waste fresh meat???
I didn’t think that it would be more wild, but it is. Terrifying.
Oh yes. The graveyard is quarantined.
Longyearbyen has some other nice laws, such as it being illegal to lock the doors of houses and cars (so that people can escape polar bears), or it being illegal to leave the town without firearms (so that people can defend themselves from polar bears.)
Is a pretty cool place.
So it’s not illegal to die there they just firmly prefer you try not to
TERFs: oh you poor sexually disordered people being used by tras… we’ll accept you tho :)
Intersex ppl: hey don’t fucking say we’re sexually disordered tf
TERFs: stupid fucking herms i bet you aren’t even a real intersex person why don’t you just kill yourself
Crazy accurate lol. Don’t forget the part where they cite some diagnostic source from the medical establishment like “look it says DSD” and they don’t seem to understand that we’re challenging that too.
“but one doctor called it dsd” yea some doctors also used to call bipolar women hysterical. and many doctors still think black people cant feel as much pain as white people. and being gay was a mental illness for a long time. bigotry makes its way into medicine
I was told a specific nonbinary doctor had connections to a great gender-affirming endocrinologist, something I was seeking after a lot of intersexist medical discrimination and intentional violation my body. This doctor asked “well you’re not trying to transition, right?”
And then sent me off to a random endocrinologist, a licensed medical specialist with a salary and a car and a home and a big fat medical degree, who was horrified that I wasn’t hiding my intersex traits, assured me that my body hair is only this thick because I shaved it for so long, because shaving makes your body hair thicker according to this fucking MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL, and then spent an hour trying to convince me that I have to be a trans man to be comfortable looking the way I do. This was made worse by the fact that I was seeking low-dose T, because it’s been known to work better at making people with bodies like mine more functional, instead of estrogen, which made me very very sick when I was forced on it because I’m intersex.
A nonbinary specialist known for being one of the top HIV doctors in the area threw me off to a random endocrin who spent an hour verbally abusing me in 2023. Doctors are absolutely incredibly intersexist, absolutely still trying to fix us, and even if they’re nonbinary working at a primarily queer clinic, they don’t give a shit about us.
“I was sent to Earth to guide the Father’s experiments, no matter their size, strength, or teeth. They recognized our halos, one looked into my eyes and I knew it in my heart that they were also the Father’s Children.”
And I’m sorry but sometimes horrible people write good books or make good music. If you keep acting like this isn’t possible, you might find yourself making excuses once YOUR favorite artist gets outed as a bigot and you can’t just pull out the “I always hated their stuff anyway.”
Not that anybody asked, but I think it’s important to understand how shame and guilt actually work before you try to use it for good.
It’s a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.
Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.
Let’s say you’re a parent and your kid is having issues.
Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)
Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that’s what shame does!
You can’t guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!
If you want it in a simple phrase:
You can shame someone out of being a bad person, but you can’t shame them into being a good person.
Fun fact, that was literally what inspired me to make this post!
Not that anybody asked, but I think it’s important to understand how shame and guilt actually work before you try to use it for good.
It’s a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.
Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.
Let’s say you’re a parent and your kid is having issues.
Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)
Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that’s what shame does!
You can’t guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!
If you want it in a simple phrase:
You can shame someone out of being a bad person, but you can’t shame them into being a good person.
Fun fact, that was literally what inspired me to make this post!
Not that anybody asked, but I think it’s important to understand how shame and guilt actually work before you try to use it for good.
It’s a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.
Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.
Let’s say you’re a parent and your kid is having issues.
Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)
Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that’s what shame does!
You can’t guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!
If you want it in a simple phrase:
You can shame someone out of being a bad person, but you can’t shame them into being a good person.
Fun fact, that was literally what inspired me to make this post!
Not that anybody asked, but I think it’s important to understand how shame and guilt actually work before you try to use it for good.
It’s a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.
Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.
Let’s say you’re a parent and your kid is having issues.
Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)
Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that’s what shame does!
You can’t guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!
If you want it in a simple phrase:
You can shame someone out of being a bad person, but you can’t shame them into being a good person.
Fun fact, that was literally what inspired me to make this post!
Not that anybody asked, but I think it’s important to understand how shame and guilt actually work before you try to use it for good.
It’s a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.
Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.
Let’s say you’re a parent and your kid is having issues.
Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)
Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that’s what shame does!
You can’t guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!
If you want it in a simple phrase:
You can shame someone out of being a bad person, but you can’t shame them into being a good person.
Fun fact, that was literally what inspired me to make this post!
ALT
ALT
ALT
