i just want my life to revolve around love and art and passion and making others feel safe and secure and just enjoy living as a whole and i don’t think that’s too much to ask for tbh
My ideal date? You release me into the wild to hunt me for sport on your remote island BUT I’m not very good at hiding so you find me within 20 minutes. You hold the gun to my face but there is something so earnest in my eyes and hands that you cannot carry through. You pick me up and carry me back to your mansion. I am so polite and charming that you nurse me back to health. You grow to love and trust me despite the fact you’re holding me hostage after I fell of a charter vessel bound for Brazil. You buy me new clothes and have them shipped to the island. I kiss you good morning every day. You propose marriage. I accept. We skype in a priest and get married with the butler as our witness. That night I kill you and the butler. I redistribute your wealth. I live in the mansion on the abandoned island for the rest of my days. I study snail ecology. I never remarry. You were the love of my life but you were too dangerous and evil to live. I am buried next to you. The tides eventually wash our bodies away. Into the depths of the ocean, together.
My ideal date? You release me into the wild to hunt me for sport on your remote island BUT I’m not very good at hiding so you find me within 20 minutes. You hold the gun to my face but there is something so earnest in my eyes and hands that you cannot carry through. You pick me up and carry me back to your mansion. I am so polite and charming that you nurse me back to health. You grow to love and trust me despite the fact you’re holding me hostage after I fell of a charter vessel bound for Brazil. You buy me new clothes and have them shipped to the island. I kiss you good morning every day. You propose marriage. I accept. We skype in a priest and get married with the butler as our witness. That night I kill you and the butler. I redistribute your wealth. I live in the mansion on the abandoned island for the rest of my days. I study snail ecology. I never remarry. You were the love of my life but you were too dangerous and evil to live. I am buried next to you. The tides eventually wash our bodies away. Into the depths of the ocean, together.
I’m still pretty new to chess, can anyone tell me what I’m supposed to do if my opponent plays the Eight Fucking Bears opening? I’m really having trouble.
“Why did you divide the country up like that?” these are the regions and sub-regions the US Census divides the country up into, I stole the map from a website about the Census.
so I’m a lifelong atheist and I’ve never actually read the bible but this guy sure seems like he has ADHD
you’re telling me he hyperfocused so hard he created the whole world in 6 days, then got kinda tired of it and didn’t really do anything until the project started going wrong at which point he tried in frustration to flood the whole thing so he could start over
“with the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day” bestie it is time to get tested
I unironically love the theological hot takes on this site.
I forget which comedian said it, but I still remember this one joke that went like “honestly so much of religion makes sense if God is a 10 year old autistic boy”
One time I was ringing up this sweet older gentleman at the sex shop. I no longer remember what he was buying, just that he was in his fifties and radiated a bumbling gentleness that I had enjoyed.
He was chatting with me as he pulled out cash to pay, “You know, I always thought it would be so much easier to meet ladies. But then you meet a girl and you start chatting and they’re never as impressed that I know Captain Kirk’s middle name as I expected them to be.”
I took his payment with a grin and said, “I dunno, Tiberius is an amazing middle name, it was their loss.”
He looked at me with utter awe, radiating a disbelieving joy that I’d parried his quip so effortlessly with Trekkie lore. “If I were thirty years younger…” he’d said, absolutely delighted.
I didn’t have the heart to tell him I was gay to boot, so I just beamed and wished him a good day. He went out the door with a spring in his step and I still smile to think about it.
October 14, 1977, Anita Bryant is pied for her antigay bigotry at a press conference in Des Moines, IA.
It was 40 years ago today…
Never gets old.
40 years on and it still is gratifying
Anita’s still alive and kicking and being anti-gay. Thom Higgins, who threw the pie when he was 27 – and was poetically from Beaver Dam – passed away 17 years later at 44. Info on his life is here. The pie throwing was a big deal. In an age before the internet let gays feel connected, and long before ACT UP, the pie showed small pockets of gays that we could fight back.
it showed that gays were human beings, who might be in the room with you, that you had been accepting as being equals and treating as people. you didnt suspect them as bieng gay, why should you treat them different after? do they become less human after finding out?
i mean, its almost like you just found out they have an oppinion on your bullshit
She was “pied” on TV. All across the country, people got to see proof that the LGBT community weren’t going to just sit there and take it. People who thought they had no choice but to stay silent saw a horrible woman get humiliated on live TV.
I’m gonna pitch a show as “like Game of Thrones but even more gritty and realistic” and then it’s nothing but a baron handling land estimates and organizing road repairs and stuff. There’ll be an entire episode about how a peasant gets brought to court for letting milk cattle graze on communal pastureland even though it’s supposed to be reserved for draft animals.
my ten-episode plan from the writer’s room of this blessed show: -ep. 1: meet the accounting staff of this magical kingdom in a far-off land -ep. 2: land estimates, plenary powers of wizards employed by the office of the royal treasury, and how tax code intersects with succession laws of absolute primogeniture when the lineage in question may have extra-planar ancestry -ep. 3: a full-hour hearing with flashbacks on how mrs. Jones’ cow grazing actually violates three local statutes, is in line with a conflicting royal decree (potentially issued under ensorcelled compulsion), and is entitled to binding arbitration via fey courts. mrs. jones is not entitled to said arbitration, the cow is. -ep. 4: how land rights and taxation applies to druid circles and sentient treefolk, especially when said land is technically owed fealty to both a human and inhuman entity. we never see any treefolk. -ep. 5: the differing rights and responsibilities of yeomen who freehold land near a lord’s manse vs. yeomen who freehold land held by the lord’s vassals vs. burghers in cities surrounded by forty-foot high gilded walls inscribed with runes so terrible they will burn a man’s flesh just from touching. extensive tax comparisons are made based on type of property held and crop status (cereal crop taxed x, but fiber crops taxed y). -ep. 6 - 9: ep. 3 but for a host of other problems: conflicting tax status for nobles who hold different positions (especially if they technically owe themselves fealty), bridges (just like…in general), a revolt started by a miller, and tax-deductible status for magical family heirlooms and whether or not being part of a dragon’s hoard can be considered “held in escrow.” -ep. 10: the queen kills the king. this is never explained but on a rewatch, isn’t surprising. it does rattle the staff as they look to cook the books and make sure they get paid as revolution sweeps the land. a brief aside is delved into concerning mercenaries. this takes less than five minutes; the rest of the episode concerns a detailed archive of back-taxes owed by the rebel dukes.
I. Am. Disgusted. SIGNAL BOOST this!! This is unacceptable! We need to remember what pride is and what we stand for.
The gall of these people trying to call the cops on a black trans woman at the Stonewall Inn on the very anniversary of the riot (I’m sure they totally understood the irony of it) and then call her the fascist.
It’s beyond parody. This is why I’m sick of Pride being treated as a corporate party rather than a protest and why we need to teach the history of our movement because this is either appalling ignorance or outright and open bigotry.
Honestly? Narilamb is probably the funniest ship out there. What do you mean it’s a cat and a sheep. What do you mean cats look at headbutts like a sign of affection but sheep look at it as an attack. What do you mean they both can purr actually. What do you mean cats love lanolin cuz it relaxes them. If they ever had a kid it would be called a shitten. A SHITTEN.
And also it’s literally the perfect ship for anyone who’s queer and/or religiously traumatized to latch onto. WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS A GOD AND HIS MOST DEVOTED BELIEVER WHO’S BOTH HIS SALVATION AND HIS DEMISE?????
captured by a vampire but theyre trying to find a good youtube video to watch while sucking your blood and youre just like come on can you just get it over with
October 14, 1977, Anita Bryant is pied for her antigay bigotry at a press conference in Des Moines, IA.
It was 40 years ago today…
Never gets old.
40 years on and it still is gratifying
Anita’s still alive and kicking and being anti-gay. Thom Higgins, who threw the pie when he was 27 – and was poetically from Beaver Dam – passed away 17 years later at 44. Info on his life is here. The pie throwing was a big deal. In an age before the internet let gays feel connected, and long before ACT UP, the pie showed small pockets of gays that we could fight back.
it showed that gays were human beings, who might be in the room with you, that you had been accepting as being equals and treating as people. you didnt suspect them as bieng gay, why should you treat them different after? do they become less human after finding out?
i mean, its almost like you just found out they have an oppinion on your bullshit
She was “pied” on TV. All across the country, people got to see proof that the LGBT community weren’t going to just sit there and take it. People who thought they had no choice but to stay silent saw a horrible woman get humiliated on live TV.
sometimes i think about how like… you can just install stuff places. most people probably wouldn’t know you’re doing it rogue. like i could just put a bench somewhere. it’s not that hard if you have a high powered hammer drill, some zap-its, and some pour rock. probably would get in trouble if you got caught but like how many people would even question it if someone in a hi vis vest in broad daylight started doing something like that? sometimes i think about these things.
friendly reminder that you don’t need any diagnosis or disorder to adapt your routine to accommodate you! sit down in the shower. brush your teeth and wash your face in the shower. bring a chair to the kitchen while you cook. use unscented products. your routine should be built for you.
Can i add? You also don’t need any diagnosis or disorder to use things that will improve your life. Use a cane, install a shower chair, use a kid app for brushing your teeth if it helps to maintain your attention. You don’t need permission to make your own life better.
after my gay tortoise wedding crasher experience i feel like there’s a nonzero chance that tony’s handler will see this somehow im sorry if i didn’t remember what you looked like accurately, i was distracted by your shirt and the cutest puppy i ever saw in my life
living in a village of farmers is the fucking best i just left a party and the butcher was like hey i got some bones for your dog. your dog specifically because i like the cut of his jib. hell yeah
do you know how fucking great it is to get home tipsy as hell wake up your dog he is already exited to see you and you are like here you go a big bone for your majesty…my man thought he was damn heaven!! so good
his majesty himself
[ID: tags by @m-e-w-666 that read: #this blue dog is just like that green cat ///end ID]
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