So I just went with my buddy while he got a rib tattoo, and they hurt like a lot, so he’s over there grimacing and being a huge manbaby so I just reach over and grab his hand so he can squeeze it because I’m a good person who helps others
And he’s clinging to my hand like it’s a life preserver and I’m being me and talking about nonsense like Grimace from the McDonalds commercials and how R2D2 is always ready to throw hands, and whatever, and the artist keeps glancing over at me and I’m like do your tattoo bro I’ve got my buddy handled
But then I realize he’s like, looking over because he can’t tell if he’s seeing something or not, and I glance down and I see my rainbow scalemail bracelet, and how I’m talking to my buddy all fondly and I’m like stroking his arm like he’s a wounded animal, and right as it clicks in my head the tattoo artist asks in his most nonchalant voice possible, like intentionally bland, I’m just talking about the weather haha what do you mean voice:
“So, are you guys close?”
And my gay ass is over to the side internally screaming because yeah, I am gay, but like this is just me being a good bro and my buddy is COMPLETELY OBLVIOUS TO WHAT IS HAPPENING BECAUSE HE’S A GARBAGE STRAIGHT PERSON AND HE SAYS
“Yeah of course, that’s why I asked him to come”
SO NOW THE TATTOO ARTIST THINKS HE’S RIGHT AND HE HAS A GAY COUPLE GETTING A TATTOO AND MY BUDDY HAS NO IDEA AND I’M AWKWARDLY SITTING HERE LIKE SHOULD I STOP HOLDING HIS HAND??? SHOULD I CORRECT THIS TATTOO ARTIST??? SHOULD I LET MY BUDDY KNOW??? MY GAY ASS DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE BEING INCORRECTLY ACCUSED OF BEING GAY, WHAT DO YOU DO
So that tattoo artist is like “Cool man, that’s great. Good for you.”
So then my buddy is like can I get some water, and the guy comes back with one bottle of water and my buddy takes a drink and then hands it to me, and I’m like obviously he has to lay down and needs me to hold his water so I just hold it in my hand, but turns out he was offering me water, so he turns to me and is like Colton, drink some water, and I take a drink and my garbage lizard brain is like “You’re drink sharing in front of the tattoo artist, now he KNOWS he’s right”
So we’re talking about tattoos with the artist and I mention that I’m getting a tattoo in September and my buddy is like “Yeah I’m gonna go and hold HIS hand for that one haha” and the tattoo artist FUCKING SAYS “I mean, I should hope so”
I MEAN, I SHOULD HOPE SO
I MEAN, I SHOULD HOPE SO
AND NO ONE ACTUALLY BROUGHT IT UP. I KNEW WHAT THE TATTOO ARTIST WAS THINKING BUT DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING TO CORRECT HIM. NOW WHEN MY BUDDY GOES BACK AND GETS HIS NEXT TATTOO IN THE FUTURE AND I’M NOT THERE HE’S GOING TO GO “OH WHERE’S YOUR BOYFRIEND”
yoooo guys these wings my dad made look INSANE i can’t wait to try them tomorrow
i don’t think you understand i totally thought we were gonna die locked up in this castle but this fucking genius was like “im going to invent a way for humans to fly”. shout out to my dad he’s a real one fr
LMAOOO this dude told me to be careful as he affixed the wings to my back…..dad no offense but you just invented flying and we have to go high enough to avoid the king’s archers. soo
HOOOOLY SHIT YOU GUYS I AM SO AFRAID. THE GROUND IS SO FAR. HOW DO BIRDS DO THIS. OH MY GODS OH MY GODS OH MY GODS
it’s so beautiful up here
i don’t like seeing the ground. i’m going higher
it’s cold and i can’t see anything. not sure if that’s better or worse
by zeus….what is that thing…….it’s as bright as the sun and twice as warm
the gods look truly down on me this day…apollo calls to me from his chariot of fire. a mere mortal. he must think my flight such a wondrous feat
i don’t understand why but he’s coming closer. he is not supposed to stray from his path, lest the sun fall from the sky. why does he look so anguished to see me?
oh. i am in his path
it’s so hot…was it this hard to fly before? maybe i’m tired
the wax
he really does look like the sun…the light emanates from his fingers, his hair, his skin. he means to catch me. i reach for him
his skin burns. i cannot hold on
i slip through his fingers.
it takes a really long time to fall from the sky. longer than i thought
i wonder if he cried for me
i pray to him just in case. i am grateful he tried. my palms are red and cracked from where they touched divinity. the ground does not look any closer than it was
i have not seen my father since we took flight…i hope he escaped. i hope he will not witness this. i wish i could tell him how joyful these wings made me before the wax melted
i do not regret it. i have seen with my own eyes what others will only dream of
i am not afraid
i am not afraid i am not afraid i am not afraid i am not afraid i am afraid i am afraid i am afraid
please please please please please pleaseplease
the gods will not save me. i suppose this is a lesson in hubris. i am forever a flightless thing
please please please i have no coin for the ferryman if i am to die now i will never reach the realm of hades please turn me into a bird any bird or a bug or something anything please please pleasepleaseplease
I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM N
Taxonomy is tricky. Moths and butterflies make up the insect order Lepidoptera. But… just like technically wolves and coyotes are already dogs (canids = dogs-ish I guess?), butterflies are just a type of moth. A very, very small group of insects in a gigantic, humungous, incomprehensibly more diverse order of insects. Allow me to demonstrate.
POP QUIZ! QUICK! FIND THE MOTH!
Got it? Good. Here’s the answer key (NO PEEKING BEFORE SPOTTING IT YOURSELF!).
From Left to right: TOP: Painted Lichen Moth, Moonseed Moth, Beautiful Tiger (moth), Grote’s Buckmoth (endangered) BOTTOM: Eubaphe unicolor (moth), Eight-spotted Forester (moth), Ailanthus Webworm Moth, Chickweed Geometer Moth
Wait… ALL OF THEM ARE MOTHS? Of course they are. There are so few butterflies in the giant sea of moths, it’s amazing you even notice them!
Okay, okay fine. That one was tricky (or was it?). Here’s another.
AGAIN! QUICK! FIND THE MOTH!
Easier this time, right? Let’s see how you did! (NO CHEATING)
From Left to Right: TOP: Checkered Skipper, Soldier Pansy, Funereal Duskywing, Dotted Checkerspot (endangered) BOTTOM: Texas Powdered Skipper, Tawny Emperor, Reakirt’s Blue, Fatal Metalmark
Wait… so which one is the moth? NONE OF THEM THESE ARE BUTTERFLIES. “What do you mean these are butterflies, they are boring?!” Shut up I love them. “But moths are supposed to be the boring ones!” Shut up moths are cooler than a T-rex with a mohawk riding a skateboard.
Left: Eggplant Leafroller Moth, caterpillars live on plants; Right: Jalisco Petrophila Moth, caterpillars are aquatic and grow up in freshwater and the adult female moths will swim into the water to lay her eggs GUYS SHE IS A MOTH!!!!!! Also: they are jumping spider mimics! Look!
tumblr is the only website where users can inflict psychological torture on each other, my mutual just reblogged like 50 posts of sherlock gifs in a row. and im powerless to stop him. what can i possibly do, unfollow him? don’t be ridiculous
every post about a woman accused of abuse: if a man did this he’d be crucified
every post about a man accused of abuse: look guys, this is a really nuanced conversation and we can’t forget the part right wing media plays in these discussions
I do love Tumblr’s isolation from some topics, but we’re tragically missing out on the JD Vance couchfucking saga
OKAY I’LL SUMMARIZE
So JD Vance is Trump’s veep pick to replace Mike Pence (who made the fatal GOP error of following the constitution on J6 2020 and not announcing Trump as eternal godking)
Overall, Vance’s rollout since the GOP convention has been
not
great
Now, some important context is that a bunch of extremely sexist and off-putting video has surfaced from previous campaigns, podcasts, etc. For example:
In a 2021 appearance on Tucker Carlson’s former Fox News show, Vance, who was then a candidate for the Ohio Senate, told Carlson that the United States was being run by “a bunch of childless cat ladies who are miserable at their own lives and the choices that they’ve made and so they want to make the rest of the country miserable, too.”
This generated a lot of outrage, as you’d expect, and the current peak result of this quote is major news outlets talking about Jennifer Aniston calling him heartless. Vance’s other quotes are driving a lot of news stories, they can be looked up, yadda yadda, but they’re not really part of this particular saga.
No, what’s really captured people’s attention about Vance is this one tweet that someone dashed off:
Damn, it even has page numbers cited! It must be legit, right?
No. It’s totally made up. But people wanted to believe, and boy, did they run with it. A sample:
Snopes chimed in with a factcheck on whether that text was in Vance’s book, and no, it was not.
The Associated Press tried to do the same, but there’s one problem: they phrased their headline a little differently.
And people pointed out that while you can objectively verify whether certain text is contained inside a book, you can’t actually verify that Vance has never had sex with a couch! Whether for the AP realizing that they’d posted an unverifiable “factcheck” headline, or for an editor going “why the fuck did you write that in the first place,” this soon happened:
Which means that if you try to visit the article saying that no, Vance didn’t fuck a couch, you see this:
As many people immediately realized: it’s funny to have the AP run its initial headline; it’s fuckinghilarious for them to pull the factcheck after its publication. The collective hilarity surged even higher.
watching gen z and millennials make fun of gen alpha has been torturous. “But they’re actually stupid” 1. theyre middle schoolers 2. isn’t that what older gens said about us? don’t you remember being 11?
it truly is just “impulse reaction to cringe <- has not yet unlearned shame”
It is O-fucking-Kay if you think you’re trans except for that one thing
If you think you might be a girl but you like having your hair short, or you don’t like wearing dresses, or you don’t want to wear makeup, that is totally okay
If you think you might be a guy but you like having long hair or you really love skirts or you wear lots of sparkly jewellery, that is totally okay
If you think you might be nonbinary but you really like presenting in a way that aligns with your agab, that is totally okay
If you think you might be trans but you aren’t sure if you want hormones, that is totally okay
If you think you’re trans “except for…” that is totally okay and get this: you don’t have to change that part of yourself to be trans
You can if you want to, but if you don’t, that is totally okay
“the arts and sciences are completely separate fields that should be pitted against each other” the overlap of the arts and sciences make up our entire perceivable reality they r fucking on the couch
Art vs STEM is a lie created to stop us from turning on the real enemy: business and economics
Arts vs STEM is a lie, the computer that put us on the moon was a loom of woven wires, our space suits were made by hand sewing, we need chemistry to mix paint and we need biology to raise the sheep who make the wool we spin into yarn and crochet or knit or weave and the world is beautiful
Your hands are now clean of any reblog bait you didn’t engage with, any compulsions you didn’t obey, or any other intrusive thoughts or mental spiraling.
If a website has a paywall, like New York Times, DO NOT use the ctrl+A shortcut then the ctrl+c shortcut as fast as you can because then you may accidentally copy the entire article before the paywall comes up. And definitely don’t do ctrl+v into the next google doc or whatever you open because then you will accidentally paste the entire article into a google doc or something!!!! I repeat DO NOT do this because it is piracy which is absolutely totally wrong!!!
Also do NOT append “12ft.io/” before a URL ! Typing an URL like this https://12ft.io/<URL> will redirect to a site that would break the display of the page by removing the paywall !
Honestly it’s kind of prohibited to mash CTRL+P before some paywall windows can load in to get a PDF of the article. Really shouldn’t be done tbh very dangerous🤷🏿♂️ ❌️
Anyone else getting really fucking sick of this support:condemn dichotomy where folks online act like the only two possible responses to anything ever are to wholeheartedly support it or wholeheartedly condemn it?
“Oh you said that you dont think that random stranger should be sent full on death threats and doxxed for their iffy artwork? Why do you support racism” how about we all go outside and interact with real people and see how they react when you say things like that!
“I dont think you should full on ruin this persons life and all their chances of existing online forever over something that could very well be a shitty mistake that can be corrected” seems to be a real hot take among the same crowd who claims to support prison abolition
so funny to me when white american christians are like “ooh i incorporate my religious trauma into my art and thats why i draw these stained glass gothic church gold multi eyed reneissance sculpture angels agnus dei” like i know your protestant southern california ass didnt have any of that. go make some art about this
ok
Damn way to read the assignment and go above and beyond.
the bleakness and sanitized feel of most American protestant churches really is an underused medium.
idk why tf the images were deemed to be ‘violating community guidelines’, but here’s what this post used to look like
Jeez some of these details like Wendy’s mom being dead and Waddles potentially dying are depressing.
The Dipper one especially. That recontextualizes so much about how him and Mabel acted around the end of the series.
No wonder Dip latched onto authority figures so much and wanted to stay with Ford. He was afraid that when he came home, his parents would be divorced.
But where Dipper looked for replacement parents in other adult figures in an attempt to find stability, Mabel clung to whatever stability/reliable family she already had, Dipper. Mable wasn’t looking for replacement parents because Dipper essentially filled that role for her, a dependable, reliable family member who would always be there to get her out of trouble. But Mabel couldn’t be that person for Dipper in return, so Dipper looked elsewhere for that stability and found it in Ford.
So when the possibility of Dipper not going home came up, Mabel panicked because she would be losing that stability and would return to fighting parents without anyone to depend on.
Mabel handing over the rift makes a lot more sense now. Endless Summer for her equals Endless Stability.
Here’s to the people who can’t get the words on the page. The people who are too tired after all life throws at them to write. The people who are blocked. The people who are burnt out. The people who can’t write because of physical or mental illnesses. The people who don’t know why they can’t write. And the people struggling with all those other things that get in the way of writing and make it seem or be impossible.
You’re still a writer, you’re still an artist. And you matter. This world is better since you’re in it. Thank you for wanting to write, even if you can’t right now. I hope you and your words find each other soon.
The term and concept of “rent lowering gunshots” has seeped into my mental vocabulary, and I’ve welcomed it there. Something I’m up to is gross and weird? Good, keeps the rent low. Keeps judgy people out. Post weird shit on your blog, do weird shit to your hair, be as fucky as your heart ever wants to be. If you’re not the one making the profit, make yourself unprofitable. The aposematism of brightly coloured creatures is there to warn predators, not friends.
You have no moral obligation to make yourself palatable for those who would consume you.
You have no moral obligation to make yourself palatable for those who would consume you.
I need sci fi fans to please be normal about the Three Laws of Robotics. These are not a serious proposal about AI ethics – they’re a narrative logic puzzle created to facilitate writing detective stories about robots. They’re the sort of thing you’d invent to annoy Daniel Craig if you made a movie where Benoit Blanc goes to space.
A couple of folks have commented that the Three Laws are like the Prime Directive in Star Trek, but that’s not really it.
The problem with Star Trek’s Prime Directive is that half the time the shows are genuinely trying to take it seriously and crashing face-first into its moral inadequacy.
The Three Laws of Robotics, conversely, are explicitly designed to fail. Their storytelling function is to create verbal logic puzzles with tangible consequences.
When a robot in an Asimovian detective story manages to twist “a robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm” around into something horrifying by playing semantic games with the definition of the word “human”, that’s not trying to make a profound statement about the nature of humanity – it’s presenting a puzzle-box for the reader to solve, and challenging them to figure out how the robot did it before the detective does.
This is probably my most well known embroidery animation. The main goal with this one was to see how complex I could make a character design in this medium and still have it be feasible to make. The answer is: about this complex, lol. After this one I began bringing in bits of fabric so that I could still have complex designs but make things a little faster for myself.
This is probably my most well known embroidery animation. The main goal with this one was to see how complex I could make a character design in this medium and still have it be feasible to make. The answer is: about this complex, lol. After this one I began bringing in bits of fabric so that I could still have complex designs but make things a little faster for myself.
yoooo guys these wings my dad made look INSANE i can’t wait to try them tomorrow
i don’t think you understand i totally thought we were gonna die locked up in this castle but this fucking genius was like “im going to invent a way for humans to fly”. shout out to my dad he’s a real one fr
LMAOOO this dude told me to be careful as he affixed the wings to my back…..dad no offense but you just invented flying and we have to go high enough to avoid the king’s archers. soo
HOOOOLY SHIT YOU GUYS I AM SO AFRAID. THE GROUND IS SO FAR. HOW DO BIRDS DO THIS. OH MY GODS OH MY GODS OH MY GODS
it’s so beautiful up here
i don’t like seeing the ground. i’m going higher
it’s cold and i can’t see anything. not sure if that’s better or worse
by zeus….what is that thing…….it’s as bright as the sun and twice as warm
the gods look truly down on me this day…apollo calls to me from his chariot of fire. a mere mortal. he must think my flight such a wondrous feat
i don’t understand why but he’s coming closer. he is not supposed to stray from his path, lest the sun fall from the sky. why does he look so anguished to see me?
oh. i am in his path
it’s so hot…was it this hard to fly before? maybe i’m tired
the wax
he really does look like the sun…the light emanates from his fingers, his hair, his skin. he means to catch me. i reach for him
his skin burns. i cannot hold on
i slip through his fingers.
it takes a really long time to fall from the sky. longer than i thought
i wonder if he cried for me
i pray to him just in case. i am grateful he tried. my palms are red and cracked from where they touched divinity. the ground does not look any closer than it was
i have not seen my father since we took flight…i hope he escaped. i hope he will not witness this. i wish i could tell him how joyful these wings made me before the wax melted
i do not regret it. i have seen with my own eyes what others will only dream of
i am not afraid
i am not afraid i am not afraid i am not afraid i am not afraid i am afraid i am afraid i am afraid
please please please please please pleaseplease
the gods will not save me. i suppose this is a lesson in hubris. i am forever a flightless thing
please please please i have no coin for the ferryman if i am to die now i will never reach the realm of hades please turn me into a bird any bird or a bug or something anything please please pleasepleaseplease
I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM NOT AFRAID I AM N
Tumblr post: I wish some people would be more polite to cashiers
The exact sort of person this post was talking about: Fuck you, just because you bag my groceries doesn’t mean you’re entitled to women sucking your dick you fucking incel! Where do you get off asking for sexual favors from customers???
OP: That’s not even remotely what I said. I never brought up sex at all?
The complete dipshit from before: oh so now you’re saying asexuals shouldn’t be allowed to buy groceries????
Dozens of people in the notes: (argues about how being rude to cashiers is a local tradition in some countries, claims that bagging groceries was an ancient Native American courtship ritual, debating the ethics of casual sex with retail workers, and a dozen other arguments that completely miss the original point all while calling each other pedophiles and/or beta cucks)
OP: (silently wishes everyone’s heads would explode)
im excited to get top surgery bc oh blah blah disphoria back pain slouching not a girl but mainly because i have been planning for over a year a joke thats about to pay off:
my family does not know i am getting surgery so i made sure to get all the same bathings suits i wore last year in a new size and just straight up gas light my aunt about it
like imagine her. you go to the beach with your family one day. its a beautiful day and you are obsessed with commenting on peoples bodies. everyone begins removing their coverings and you are now seeing someone who, historically, has bazonga’d with the best of them. this person is no longer breasting boobily. child, you say, what has happened to your one redeeming feminine quality? the child responds, auntie wat the hell you tawking bout? ive always looked like this i literally wore this last year??
UPDATE showed up to the family party in a tank top instead to get everyone at once and it went a little like this
I mean, stop motion animation is always impressive in the abstract; but it’s even MORE impressive (at least to me) when we can see the person’s hand holding the figure, and the figure is a poseable toy much like stuff I’ve played with as a child, and it’s all taking place in what seems to be someone’s home; that removes the distance of “oh film artists can do a lot of cool things” with its abstract respect, and brings it into the realm of “WOW this is a thing that real people are somehow able to do, with a lot of work”.
