Jerry Seinfeld says that you could never do Seinfeld today but one time when I was really high I fell asleep and dreamed a new episode where Jerry came out of the closet as a trans woman and Elaine wanted to be supportive so she gifted Jerry a dress that she didn’t really like but when Jerry wore the dress out she got tons of compliments and Elaine gets super pissed about it because she never got any compliments when she wore it but couldn’t say anything because she didn’t want anyone to call her a fake ally.
uk journalists having to report through gritted teeth that there were no riots last night as thousands of anti-racist protesters significantly outnumbered the racist rioters across the country
around 10,000 people counter-protesting in walthamstow last night
here in brighton, with the three (3) racists vs thousands of anti racist counter-protesters
How is bnha anime of the decade…… they aren’t even anime of the hour of the minute of the second
The notes on this post were so toxic that staff just axed em
1969………
Yes, when the original post is deleted from the server (not just the blog, but the Tumblr servers), there is no root post for notes to be added onto, and also no root post for time to be counted from, so it starts from zero. Most computer operating systems use Unix, which was launched in 1971 with the epoch date of midnight on January 1, 1970 as 1. Therefore zero is one second behind that date: December 31, 1969. Also, very unfortunately, this also means nobody except you and anyone you reblog it to will see this explanation, as you cannot open the notes to see comments when there are no notes.
The article ends with the fact that Chris King, the customer service member who wrote the letter, quit Sainsbury’s and went back to college to become a primary school teacher, which I think is a great epilogue!
The article ends with the fact that Chris King, the customer service member who wrote the letter, quit Sainsbury’s and went back to college to become a primary school teacher, which I think is a great epilogue!
that alone would constitute only a Z module and cows by their nature aren’t rational so there’s no way to construct a vector space out of them
Z-module cows can have little a vector space. As a treat
yeah you need to associate the cows with a field for them to be a vector space. luckily this is easy, as cows are already associated with fields. just look at em. they’re always out in fields.
Whoever invented “open in app” links that redirect you to the app store instead of actually opening the app even when you already have the app installed on your phone should be involuntarily turned into a beanbag chair
The actual supervillains at Google are probably to blame
Just so you all know, my tumblr glitched egregiously so now every time someone reblogs this from me, tumblr takes me off of my dashboard or search results and forces me to see this post again
house and wilson decide the only thing stopping them from dating is that neither of them is a woman so they start secretly dosing each other with estrogen and slipping in she/hers in regards to each other until one of them notices and then it’s a race to see who can forcefem the other one the fastest and the winner gets to be the man
I feel like tumblr is giving me a very skewed idea of what House M.D is about.
today in “making up ways to help kids decompress on the fly”: i had kids cup their hands in front of them and for 1 silent minute, picture a small mouse in their hand. afterwards they got to tell me, one at a time, what their mice did
figured it would be fun to add some quotes from my 4 year olds on what their mice did
“she danced and twisted”
“my mouse went to jump in a pond and then rowed a boat”
“mine ate cotton candy and then he got so sick”
“I let my mouse go and he went home to visit his family”
It just happened this week. It all started with some guy. This person placed in order for a new Bible. Nothing out of the ordinary. But when they get the package, they realize that this was not the Bible they ordered from Amazon. Oh no, it’s this.
Now once this picture is posted, everyone starts explaining what the book actually is, what Gravity Falls is and giving recommendations in overall they’re taking it really well .
Now this isn’t the funny part. Sure, getting the complete opposite of the Bible is one thing but then this happens…
 you couldn’t write better material than this. It’s been verified to be authentic story. The entire Gravity Falls Sub Reddit has gone wild over this.
Worst part about this is I’ve only ever used that yellow square emoji once and it was just to see how it looked. This isn’t who I am. However, in retrospect, I suppose it is
Reading through the notes is a surreal experience please keep adding more to fuel my effervescent consumption of non descriptive emojis
sorry if i’m being a party pooper but because rabies is apparently the new joke on here ??? please remember that rabies has an almost 100% fatality rate after symptoms develop so if you’re bitten or scratched by an animal that you aren’t 100% sure is vaccinated then GO TO A DOCTOR. it’s not a joke. really.
You’re being kind when you say “almost 100% fatality”. What people need to hear is: if you get to develop rabies symptoms, you’re dead. If you get heavy treatment after developping symptoms, you still need a miracle. Like, a real miracle, you should enter some religion if you escape that.
ALSO, I don’t want people feeling confident about petting stray/wild animals because there’s a vaccine available, either. I’ll explain why from my own experience (I’m not a doctor).
I got bitten by a wild tamarin once, on the pulp of my index finger. It drew blood, there are many wild animals in the area (tamarins, possums, bats, foxes) and it isn’t that uncommon to hear about 1 or 2 rabies cases every now and again (a puppy we gave to a friend got it, for instance), so I went to an ambulatory immediately.
Because I was bitten in an ultrasensitive area, I needed fast treatment. But it was also a small area, so the usual thing they do - inject the vaccine in the place - wasn’t a choice. They told me they’d divide the shot in 5 small ones, and inject me all over my body, so the antidote would get to my entire system fast.
Please stop for a moment and think that the disease is so worrysome that they’d rather needle me all over than to give me one shot and wait until it spread through my system.
Then they said that, okay, but there was a catch first. I needed to take an antiallergic shot. “Why?” “Because the virus is devastating, and as the vaccine is made from it, but weakened (like almost every vaccine) it will still create a reaction, and it’s a strong one, and it’s veru common for people to have strong allergic reactions to it.” YOU HAVE TO TAKE AN ANTIALLERGIC SHOT IN ORDER TO TAKE THE VACCINE COZ THE VACCINE COULD POTENTIALLY MAKE YOU REALLY SICK
ALSO IT WASN’T JUST “A LITTLE ANTIALLERGIC SHOT”
IT WAS ONE OF THESE FUCKERS HERE.
It was OBVIOUSLY dripped in my body and not injected because HAHAHAHA. Truth be told I was an adult already and I’m tall so I have a lot of mass but STILL.
So after I had taken the antiallegic and was starting to feel drowsy (as a side effect of it) the doctor came with the 5 shots.
- One in each buttock
- One in each thigh
- One in my left arm
They all stung like a bitch and I usually don’t care about shots.
“Okay so can I go home now?”
“No, we have to keep you under observation for 2h so we’re SURE the vaccine won’t give you any reaction.”
BINCH I WAS GIVEN A BUTTLOAD OF MEDICINE BUT THERE WAS STILL A RISK.
I slept through the two hours and then was liberated to go home. My legs, butt, and left arm hurt all over, like I had been punched there, for a few days. I also had a fever (not feverish, a fever)
BUT DID YOU THINK IT WAS OVER?
WRONG!!!
I had to take four reinforcement shots in the next month, one a week, so I could be positively be considered immunized.Every time I took a shot, my arm would swell and hurt like it’d been hit, and when night came I’d have a fever. Because that’s how fucking strong the vaccine is, BECAUSE THAT’S HOW VICIOUS THE VIRUS IS.
So yeah. DO NOT PUT YOURSELF IN RISK, GODDAMNIT. Rabies is a rare condition all over, THANK GOD, and 1 confirmed case can be already considered a surge and a reason for mass campaigning, AND FOR A REASON.
If you like messing with stray/wild animals, don’t go picking them up and be extra careful. Or just, like, DON’T - call a vet or an authority that can handle them safely.
I must add that I live in a country with universal healthcare, so I didn’t pay a single penny for my treatment. Is this your reality? If not, ONE MORE REASON TO NOT FUCKING PLAY WITH THIS SHIT.
Rabies is 100% lethal. Period. If you are scratched or bitten by an animal you’re not positive is vaccinated, you need to find treatment NOW. And probably go through all that shit I’ve been through (also if you are immunosupressed? I DON’T KNOW WHAT’D HAPPEN)
Stay safe and don’t be stupid ffs
Guys, I know this isn’t art nor anything like that, but I’ve been hearing about this rabies thing and ???? Look I trust none of you would risk yourselves like this, but maybe you can educate someone through my experience and stuff.
Also rabies does not necessarily cause frothing-at-the-mouth aggression in animals. Docility is also a very common symptom so any wild animal that is ‘friendly’ or ‘likes to be pet’ is suspect. Literally any wild animal is a vector.
Finally, you don’t need to be bitten. All you need is to come into contact with an infected animal’s bodily fluids through a cut that maybe you didn’t notice when you were handling it when it drooled on you.
Never touch a wild animal.
Infection with the rabies virus progresses through three distinct stages.
Prodromal: Stage One. Marked by altered behavioral patterns. “Docility” and “likes to be pet” are very common in the prodromal stage. Usually lasts 1-3 days. An animal in this stage carries virus bodies in its saliva and is infectious.
Excitative: Stage Two. Also called “furious” rabies. This is what everyone thinks rabies is–hyperreacting to stimuli and biting everything. Excessive salivation occurs. Animals in this stage also exhibit hydrophobia or the fear of water; they cannot drink (swallowing causes painful spasms of the throat muscles), and will panic if shown water. Usually lasts 3-4 days before rapidly progressing into the next stage.
Paralytic: Stage Three. Also called “dumb” rabies. As the infection runs its course, the virus starts degrading the nervous system. Limbs begin to fail; animals in this stage will often limp or drag their haunches behind them. If the animal has survived all this way, death will usually come through respiratory arrest: Their diaphragm becomes paralyzed and they stop breathing.
And to add onto the above, saliva isn’t the only infectious fluid. Brain matter is, too. If, somehow, you find yourself in possession of a firearm and faced with a rabid animal, do not go for a head shot. If you do, you will aerosolize the brain matter and effectively create a cloud of infectious material. Breathe it in, and you’ll give yourself an infection.
When I worked in wildlife rehabilitation, I actually did see a rabid animal in person, and it remains one of the most terrifying experiences of my life, because I was literally looking death in the eyes.
A pair of well-intentioned women brought us a raccoon that they thought had been hit by a car. They had found it on the side of the road, dragging its hind legs. They managed–somehow–to get it into a cat carrier and brought it to us.
As they brought it in, I remember how eerily silent it was. Normal raccoons chatter almost constantly. They fidget. They bump around. They purr and mumble and make little grabby-hands at everything. Even when they’re in pain, and especially when they’re stressed. But this one wasn’t moving around inside the carrier, and it wasn’t making a sound.
The clinic director also noticed this, and he asked in a calm but urgent voice for the women to hand the carrier to him. He took it to the exam room and set it on the table while they filled out some forms in the next room. I took a step towards the carrier, to look at our new patient, and without turning around, he told me, “Go to the other side of the room, and stay there.”
He took a small penlight out of the drawer and shone it briefly into the carrier, then sighed. “Bear, if you want to come look at this, you can put on a mask,” he said. “It’s really pretty neat, but I know you’re not vaccinated and I don’t want to take any chances.”
And at that point, I knew exactly what we were dealing with, and I knew that this would be the closest I had ever been to certain death. So I grabbed a respirator from the table and put it on, and held my breath for good measure as I approached the table. The clinic director pointed where I should stand, well back from the carrier door. He shone the light inside again, and I saw two brilliant flashes of emerald green–the most vivid, unnatural eyeshine I had ever seen.
“I don’t know why it does it,” the director murmured, “but it turns their eyes green.”
“What does?” one of the women asked, with uncanny, unintentionally dramatic timing, as she poked her head around the corner.
“Rabies,” the director said. “The raccoon is rabid. Did it bite either of you, or even lick you?” They told us no, said they had even used leather garden gloves when they herded it into the carrier. He told them to throw away the gloves as soon as possible, and steam-clean the upholstery in their car. They asked how they should clean the cat carrier; they wanted it back and couldn’t be convinced otherwise, so he told them to soak it in just barely diluted bleach.
But before we could give them the carrier back, we had to remove the raccoon. The rabid raccoon.
The clinic director readied a syringe with tranquilizers and attached it to the end of a short pole. I don’t remember how it was rigged exactly–whether he had a way to push down the plunger or if the needle would inject with pressure–but all he would have to do was stick the animal to inject it. And so, after sending me and the women back to the other side of the room, he made his fist jab.
He missed the raccoon.
The sound that that animal made on being brushed by the pole can only be described as a roar. It was throaty and ragged and ungodly loud. It was not a sound that a raccoon should ever make. I’m convinced it was a sound that a raccoon physically could not make.
It thrashed inside the carrier, sending it tipping from side to side. Its claws clattered against the walls. It bellowed that throaty, rasping sound again. It was absolutely frenzied, and I was genuinely scared that it would break loose from inside those plastic walls.
Somehow, the clinic director kept his calm, and as the raccoon jolted around inside the cat carrier, he moved in with the syringe again, and this time, he hit it. He emptied the syringe into its body and withdrew the pole.
And then we waited.
We waited for those awful screams, that horrible thrashing, to die down. As we did, the director loaded up another syringe with even more tranquilizer, and as the raccoon dropped off into unconsciousness, he stuck it a second time with the heavier dose. Even then, it growled at him and flailed a paw against the wall.
More waiting, this time to make sure the animal was truly down for the count.
Then, while wearing welder’s gloves, the director opened the door of the carrier and removed the raccoon. She was limp, bedraggled, and utterly emaciated, but she was still alive. We bagged up the cat carrier and gave it to the women again, advising them that now was a good time to leave. They heeded our warning.
I asked if I could come closer to see, and the clinic director pointed where I could stand. I pushed the mask up against my face and tried to breathe as little as possible.
He and his co-director–who I think he was grooming to be his successor, but the clinic actually went under later that year–examined the raccoon together. Donning a pair of nitrile gloves, he reached down and pulled up a handful, a literal fistful, of the raccoon’s skin and released it. It stayed pulled up.
Severe dehydration causes a phenomenon called “skin tenting”. The skin loses its elasticity somewhat, and will be slow to return to its “normal” shape when manipulated. The clinic director estimated that it had been at least four or five days since the raccoon had had anything to eat or drink.
She was already on death’s doorstep, but her rabies infection had driven her exhausted body to scream and lunge and bite.
Because, the scariest thing about rabies (if you ask me) is the way that it alters the behavior of those it infects to increase chances of spreading.
The prodromal stage? Nocturnal animals become diurnal–allowing them to potentially infect most hosts than if they remained nocturnal.
The excitative stage? The infected animal bites at the slightest provocation. Swallowing causes painful spasms, so they drool, coating their bodies in infectious matter. A drink could wash away the virus-charged saliva from their mouth and bodies, so the virus drives them to panic at the sight of water.
(The paralytic stage? By that point, the animal has probably spread its infection to new hosts, so the virus has no need for it any longer.)
Rabies is deadly. Rabies is dangerous. In all of recorded history, one person survived an infection after she became symptomatic, and so far we haven’t been able to replicate that success. The Milwaukee Protocol hasn’t saved anyone else. Just one person. And even then, she still had to struggle to gain back control of her body after all that nerve damage.
Please, please, take rabies seriously.
This has been a warning from your old pal Bear.
I knew how bad it was, but I had never read anything like the raccoon story.
I am not exaggerating when I say that is literally terrifying.
Y'all please read this. That is absolutely hideous. That’s literally like something from a horror movie.
Do not fuck around with wildlife. Or weird strays.
TFW Rabies education comes across your dash because some fuck up calls themselves Rabiosexual.
Rebloggin’ for that raccoon. o.o The original post I can pretty much guarantee is a troll, but it’s useful to know just why rabies is such serious shit.
Education right here
Extra reminder: If you see any animal other than a dog who’s been attacked by a porcupine? It’s rabid.
Dogs are dumb, friendly fucks who will investigate anything; everything else in the animal kingdom knows better than to mess with a porcupine, unless their brain is being ravaged by something beyond their control.
If you see a non-dog animal that has porcupine quills sticking out of it? Don’t try to help it yourself. Call animal control.
@talesfromtreatment@is-the-cat-video-cute tagging you to spread the word? Apparently people have forgotten that rabies is a brain disease, terrifying, is fatal if not treated immediately, the treatment is horrid, and the treatment is very expensive
Also I heard that in the USA, human rabies pre-exposure vaccines are not widely available and cost something like $900
Get your pets rabies vaccine every year, folks. Aside from everything else - and that’s a lot of everything - the test for rabies involves the brain, so the animal will be killed first.
And that is a kind end. The videos of rabies seizures are nightmarish
This is also why you’re not supposed to sleep outside without cover (ie a CLOSED tent) if there are swooping bats in your area. Apparently it can be very hard to realize you’ve been bitten by a bat (vs a bug, I guess it’s very small). Some students from my university were on a trip where they came into contact with bats, taking lots of selfies holding them etc, in the area they were supposed to be sleeping and the professor lost it when they saw some of the pictures. The students were housed elsewhere and the university had everyone vaccinated at the school’s expense- the pre-exposure vax may be expensive, but the number of shots you get post-exposure can vary (as demonstrated above) and it was ASTRONOMICAL.
When I looking for places to move to when I can finally leave the states, I looking to laws and procedures to bring my cat with. Any place that had eradicated rabies, intense policies and quarantines for any animal entering the country, unless you were coming from a different place that had also eradicated it. Some of would put your animal down if they were symptomatic at all. I remember thinking “what can’t rabies just treated?” No it can’t be, putting your pet down is the humane option if there symptomatic.
[image: a sixty-milliliter syringe, with human hand for scale. the syringe barrel is likely around five inches long and likely has an inside diameter of an inch or more.]
When I talk to my students about Louis Pasteur and the development of vaccines, I *have* to talk about rabies.
Do you know why “dog catcher” was such a serious occupation? Because in the late 1800s rabies ran rampant in urban street dogs. Because people who got bitten by street dogs… had probably just gotten a death sentence.
As a child, Louis Pasteur watched a man from his hometown die slowly, painfully, and unstoppably from rabies from a rabid wolf bite and it stuck with him so hard that when he grew up he put his own life on the line studying and working with rabid animals to develop a treatment. (Louis Pasteur’s wife, Marie Pasteur, was also a talented, passionate scientist who worked uncredited by his side. Many of their daughters also took up research.)
When Louis Pasteur did his first human test of his rabies vaccine, it was because a mother came to him desperate. Her 8 year old son had been bitten 14 times by a street dog. Doctors were certain he was going to die. She’d heard what Pasteur was working on and begged him to try to save her son.
He tried.
It worked.
This made national news. This made GLOBAL news.
And in the small Russian town of Beloi, locals read about this miracle cure. Their town had been attacked by a rabid wolf and twenty two people had been bitten. They knew these people were going to die. So the bitten people set off walking, carrying the most injured. They walked for weeks to get to France, where Pasteur was based.
When they arrived, the only French word they knew was “Pasteur.” Their cases were dangerously far along, possibly too far. Pasteur began treatment anyway, pushing with the most aggressive dosages he dared.
This also caught global attention. The world waited on tenterhooks.
Pasteur’s vaccine saved 19 out of 22.
The world was awed.
And when those Russian villagers returned home, to their families, it would have been like seeing the dead return.
Vaccinations changed our world.
Rabies is such a terrifying and serious threat that it has shaped our cultures for centuries. The rabies vaccine is quite possibly the most important human invention since agriculture.
Vaccinate your pets.
Don’t touch wildlife.
Of lesser importance, read Rabid: A Cultural History of the World’s Most Diabolical Virus by Murphy & Wasik.
Reblogging because rabies is bloody terrifying.
Also reblogging to remember Louis Pasteur, the nineteen lives he saved then, and the many others since.
Reblogging this because apparently the antivax brainrot has started to extend to pet owners wondering if their pets really need rabies vaccines, because they’re now concerned their pets are going to get autism as well. (I wish I was joking, but according to an Ars Technica article, 37% of polled pet owners are genuinely this stupid.)
Get your pets vaccinated, and if you know any pet owners who are antivaxxers, maybe keep your pets away from theirs.
i bet in heaven they’re still on 3g phone service because they have to purify all the technology of sin but in hell they’ve got fucking 7g just blasting terabytes worth of the hottest demon porn right into your prostate
i bet in heaven they’re still on 3g phone service because they have to purify all the technology of sin but in hell they’ve got fucking 7g just blasting terabytes worth of the hottest demon porn right into your prostate
[ID: Four-panel comic with crudely drawn stick people.
Panel 1: Several people are sitting in a chair circle. One of them is visibly green, another is visibly pink with a bright blue jacket and orange pointy anime glasses. A third one is wearing a blue cap. The person in the middle, who is none of these things, leads the conversation.
Middle person: “All right everyone, time to do a hexcode circle! My hexcode is #000000, what are yours?”
Several people respond “#000000”.
Panel 2: Zoom in on the green person and the middle person, with a third in between them.
Green: “Mine’s #00FF00.”
Middle: “Oh, but we’re very inclusive here! You don’t have to fit into primary hexcodes!”
Green: “…I prefer #00FF00.”
Middle: “I’m just saying, if you want to go with something like #33BB33 that’s fine! It would suit you!”
Panel 3: Zoom on the one with the blue cap.
Closeted Blue: “I’m uh… Well, um, uh, you see-”
Middle: “Oh, looks like we have exciting news!2
Closeted Blue: ”…#000000. Sorry. I’m not uh. I’m grayscale. Can we move on?“
Panel 4: Zoom in on anime glasses.
Anime Glasses: ”#LEG3ND.“
Middle: "That’s not a real hexcode!”
Anime Glasses: “I don’t give a shit.”
Middle: “I’m sure you can find a valid hexcode that suits you!”
Anime glasses: “You dipshits can’t handle a visually green person using #00FF00, I’m not playing this game.”
i can tell i’m sleep deprived bc i just made myself cry about tutankhamun and i have, like, negative interest in the kid
have now made the rest of the discord cry about this little boy who had multi-coloured ducks sewn onto a tunic that he loved so much he wore it to a Very Important Event because he was EIGHT and have you SEEN my DUCKS
sorry no i’m not done i’m gonna make you all cry some more i’m bringing you down with me
there was once a little boy.
he is born disabled. his body hurts, and he can’t walk properly the way the other children do. he doesn’t understand why. he’s a little boy. but he plays with wooden boats and pulls toys on a string.
somebody makes him a tunic. they sew ducks onto it in red and green and yellow and blue. the bright colours of a child.
the little boy is eight years old, and he’s going to be king now. there’s a big ceremony about it. he doesn’t really fully understand what’s going on, because he’s eight, but he wears the tunic with the brightly coloured ducks for the occasion because he loves it. look at his ducks! aren’t they great?
he is a child. the adults around him manipulate and coax him to gain more power for themselves. he still plays with toys.
as a teenager, not yet an adult, he fathers children. they do not survive. he’s not even old enough to have full agency in his job and is still being manipulated, but he had babies and they died.
he does not make it to his twenties. at eighteen or nineteen years old he dies, and is buried. his babies, so tiny, are buried with him.
and so is his tunic with the little ducks that he loved so much he kept it long after it no longer fit.
there was once a little boy.
yeah i think that like. especially with historical figures in your mind people who were kings and queens or important nobles were adults. even if you know how old they were it doesn’t really click. it doesn’t seem real
but then you get something like a little tunic with brightly coloured ducks on it and it hits you like a fucking truck that this really was a little kid and no matter how far removed you are a little kid is still a little kid. their brains didn’t develop any quicker back then. he was just as developed/mature mentally as any 8 year old now. he had cartoonish animals on his clothes and he played with toy boats and probably terrorised the local cat population.
tutankhamun was a child and he didn’t make it to adulthood because he was unfortunate enough to be a very important child
his dad died when he was 8. he saw his own babies die when he was still just a boy himself.
but he had brightly coloured little ducks on his favourite shirt, and he kept it.
and he did not just keep the duckie shirt either
tutankhamun had a little pair of sandals with ducks on them. he had earrings decorated with ducks. he kept those, and other items of childhood clothing. some toys. keepsakes. things he loved, and treasured. he kept them all in a little wooden chest. the chest… was carved with ducks.
and that little duck chest, filled with things he kept from his childhood, was buried with him. maybe he was keeping them for the little babies who did not make it. maybe they just reminded him of good days and fun times.
but he was a little boy who thought ducks were just the best
WITH PLEASURE
(greyscale makes it hard but the duck head is on the right above the toe strap. always takes me a while to find it too)
King Tut was treated horrible as well because his father, Akhenaten, had been the Pharaoh to try and completely change the religious and cultural structure of Egypt which had been stagnating for a few hundred years. He moved the Capital away from Thebes, he rewrote the Egyptian religion under a singular god named Aten, which took a LOT of political power away from the religious priests. His wife was Nefertiti. Tutankhamun had a different name when he was born, Amenhotep.
We don’t know for sure how Akhenaten died, whether it was poor health or assassination, but Nefertiti died very soon after and disappears from all records. Tutankhamun is renamed with a more traditional name.
All of Akhenaten’s statues, temples, and murals are attempted to be destroyed as much as possible. The religion of Aten is scrubbed as much as possible. Power is wrestled back into the hands of the old priests where it used to be before Akhenaten tried to implement changes. Everyone tries to make things back the way they were before so they can once more control Egypt the way they used to. SO that they can have back that power.
I do love Tumblr’s isolation from some topics, but we’re tragically missing out on the JD Vance couchfucking saga
OKAY I’LL SUMMARIZE
So JD Vance is Trump’s veep pick to replace Mike Pence (who made the fatal GOP error of following the constitution on J6 2020 and not announcing Trump as eternal godking)
Overall, Vance’s rollout since the GOP convention has been
not
great
Now, some important context is that a bunch of extremely sexist and off-putting video has surfaced from previous campaigns, podcasts, etc. For example:
In a 2021 appearance on Tucker Carlson’s former Fox News show, Vance, who was then a candidate for the Ohio Senate, told Carlson that the United States was being run by “a bunch of childless cat ladies who are miserable at their own lives and the choices that they’ve made and so they want to make the rest of the country miserable, too.”
This generated a lot of outrage, as you’d expect, and the current peak result of this quote is major news outlets talking about Jennifer Aniston calling him heartless. Vance’s other quotes are driving a lot of news stories, they can be looked up, yadda yadda, but they’re not really part of this particular saga.
No, what’s really captured people’s attention about Vance is this one tweet that someone dashed off:
Damn, it even has page numbers cited! It must be legit, right?
No. It’s totally made up. But people wanted to believe, and boy, did they run with it. A sample:
Snopes chimed in with a factcheck on whether that text was in Vance’s book, and no, it was not.
The Associated Press tried to do the same, but there’s one problem: they phrased their headline a little differently.
And people pointed out that while you can objectively verify whether certain text is contained inside a book, you can’t actually verify that Vance has never had sex with a couch! Whether for the AP realizing that they’d posted an unverifiable “factcheck” headline, or for an editor going “why the fuck did you write that in the first place,” this soon happened:
Which means that if you try to visit the article saying that no, Vance didn’t fuck a couch, you see this:
As many people immediately realized: it’s funny to have the AP run its initial headline; it’s fuckinghilarious for them to pull the factcheck after its publication. The collective hilarity surged even higher.
Go participate! Go see every movie. See the bad ones, the good ones. Watch movies with the sound off and you can see how a movie’s made. If you ever think your movie you’re making is too long, it is. If you ever wonder, “Should I cut this?” the answer is, “Yes.” And somebody has to like it beside the person you’re fucking and your mother.
Penguin falls down resulting in best sound ever [x]
oh my god
NOOOOOOO
they all gasped like OHHH
IM CRYING IM PHYSICALLY CRYING HE FALLS AND THERE ALL LIKE WHAAAAWHOA U OK BRO AND HE GETS UP LIKE *SIGH* YEAH ITS FINE
Having a bad day? push play, and within six seconds all you will feel is tears of laughter streaming down your face and the stomach cramps of laughing too hard.
This is one of the finest things ever captured on film.
I’m so happy this is back
Pingu is real
[A single penguin “fwump” followed by the penguin group chorus of “whaaa”.]
i swear it would be easier to explain if someone looked over my shoulder and saw me watching porn than to explain some of the posts on my damn dashboard…this being one of them
I am going to keep it a buck. I am honestly surprised that liberals are actually trying to harm reduction logic a genocide. And not even the slow type of genocide that black people and Indigenous Americans are experiencing. Like a straight up, “we put a bunch of brown or ethnic people in a box and are giving someone the tools to light that motherfucker on fire” genocide. Not the type of genocide where it’s backed by a bunch of wealthy American entrepreneurs or the genocide that the state indirectly causes by consequence. No, it’s a simple fucking, “we are actively arming an ethnostate whose stated purpose is to wipe out a people and take their land” genocide. I joked about it at first and then there is a swath of white or privileged liberals who are like rationalizing it like wait, you aren’t meming? You’re seriously sliding down that slippery slope? My brother and sister in Satanael, what’s the point of keeping fascism at bay if the current ideology is blatantly aiding and abetting in genocide and ethnic cleansing?
And I’m serious. Call me naive but it’s straight up in your face, people. It’s not a genocide you aren’t aware of. It’s not a genocide that’s repressed by media. It’s not a genocide where you don’t see the before and after destruction. It’s the genocide that you see most of your politicians that you went to bat for unconsciously support. It’s the genocide where it could be stopped by the person whose in office because of your efforts but he is blithely supporting unconditionally. There have been several protests at his fucking doorstep. Businesses have been boycotted. Cities have called for a ceasefire. The motherfucking ICJ said y’all are probably doing a genocide so please stop killing Palestinians and they said we are going to dress as doctors and nurses and kill Palestinians who are paralyzed on top of killing 500 more Palestinians in response.
And y’all are trying to Vote Blue No Matter Who that shit? At this point, I can’t jive with y’all. No I can’t. Because I know that if push comes to shove, y’all about shit. Everything is this political game of chess and oppressed people and their struggles are your pawns. Fucking heartless.
It’s been almost a year since I wrote this and my sentiments have been exponentially increased.
All I have said and all I have ever said that you equivocated on genocide. You moved right on genocide. Somewhere along the line, you are okay with this. Project 2025 be damned, but a lot of you have not even flinched. This is just acceptable to you all now.
Okay.
So I don’t do purity politics. I am an anarchist. There is no person anyone can elect that I would have faith in to act in my best interest. They are not going to protect me from harmful laws. In fact, they will proudly legislate and bolster said harmful laws. I don’t trust them to propose bills that I support, amend them, or anything. Why? Because they aren’t you and I. That’s all I’m going to say. Have fun holding these people accountable after you elect them.
Oh look, photos of a massacre of Iraqis done by US Marines just got released just in time for Kamala to get endorsed by the man who helped create ISIS.
What alternative are you proposing? Seriously, what do you think these people could have done? Do you think that there is any way for them to convince the President to change his mind? What should they do instead of harm reduction?
There is not enough political will or ability in most of these people to even vote for anything in the sham elections much less do something more useful.
