July 2024

omniscient-sims:

*rising up from loosely packed grave soil* who the fuck buried me. This is atrocious. Do a better job next time

haemonart:

Crushing them like insects (lovingly)

spentgladiator:

silviacrossdresser:

Published in “Transvestia” magazine #38 (April 1966). I think original art could be by Bob Tupper.

not sure if anyone’s added this info here but because I wanted to know more I checked and….

Every issue of transvestia magazine, which ran from the 60’s through to the 80’s is available through the uVic archives. It was a groundbreaking publication for the crossdressing and later the transgender community. Check it out.

https://vault.library.uvic.ca/collections/6576cedf-1282-4089-8351-08f73f4199b4

sleepyjuniper:

bettsplendens:

dallasrecklessandrelentless:

That fuckin smile at the end

To the worried person in the comments: 

No, a hummingbird’s heart will not stop if it stops moving. You’re possibly thinking of Spoink, which is a Pokemon that supposedly powers its heart by bouncing, and as such can’t stop moving. Hummingbirds don’t sit often because they’re busy looking for food, but they can and do sit. The females sit on eggs in nests, after all, and they do have to sleep. 

Also! Because of how insanely high their metabolism is, hummingbirds go into a special state called torpor when they sleep, in which they slow down their heartbeat and their body temperature drops, which helps them to consume less energy so they don’t starve while they’re sleeping!

flipchild:

7dmom:

Optical illusions are a lie. I can count the dots.

Explain these

cometiny:

cometiny:

cometiny:

Let me tell you about my slop

It’s actually my favourite dish that my mom would make for me, when the scent filled the house I would run down the stairs excitedly, even though I knew it wouldn’t be done for another hour or so. My sweet sweet schmungus. My love <3

For those unfamiliar, it’s mashed up, very ripe bananas cooked and stirred until sticky and then left to cool down :3

b00tlegf4g:

lakemojave:

lakemojave:

lakemojave:

If you are currently sitting or laying down this moment ask yourself if you are resting or rotting. Change your behavior accordingly

There is no romance in decay when the decaying is easy

You are naught but pawns in my game

I hope some of y'all take this as a sign to rest intentionally too.

if you’re “resting” but thinking of all the things you have to do, that’s not resting, that’s rotting. Even if you haven’t done anything all day, give yourself some time to rest and truly relax. When you let yourself relax guilt free, you actually regain energy for your responsibilities.

nyancrimew:

boccher:

ok

go fetch

etct-deactivated20240208:

liongrl321:

lyri-da-suprstar:

liongrl321:

emmieexplores2:

give Reese her spoon back!

dont worry

I got her spoon back :)

omg thankyou so much 💖

fake-post-archive:

ahshdhhxuchfjjfj-deactivated202:

ayyyyysexual:

Tumblr on the Seven Seas

🏴‍☠️ white-beard Follow

Can we stop all normalising the use of “sc*rvy” as a fun little thing to call people?? I literally had sc*rvy last year and it was even worse than when I got my hand cut off. Fuck anyone who uses the S word without even considering how triggering it can be to those of us who have ACTUALLY suffered though it

🌅 castedaway Follow

No wenches?

🏴‍☠️ white-beard Follow

Honestly you people are so insufferable I genuinely hope you walk the plank

🌅 castedaway Follow

AHOY???

🍑 plundermebooty Follow

Okay but OP is literally a landlubber, mateys

🌴 pegmeg

nahhh why is it literally always landlubbers faking scurvy and sending plank threats ☠☠

768 notes

🗡wagscallion Follow

everyone says “land ho!” but never “land ma'am”

💨 matelotsaboteur

Really makes you think

2,041 notes

💃 crossdressing101 Follow

this whole crew was so gullible ngl, i just cut my hair and dressed in my fathers clothes and they all fell for it, hook line and sinker??

💃 crossdressing101 Follow

honestly im surprised no one has found me out yet. surely i dont seem that much like a man? i mean it makes this way easier but like. im still a woman. obviously

🕺 crossdressing101 Follow

mateys i have come to a shocking realisation,

34 notes

privatesteer Follow

wildest argument for piracy i’ve ever heard was that the gold stored on government ships is dangerous cause it weighs them down, so they’re just ‘lightening the load’

🧜‍♀️ kiss-pretty-ocean324 Follow

աaռռa ʟɨֆȶɛռ ȶօ ֆɨʀɛռ ֆօռɢ?

privatesteer Follow

no thanks

🕶 monstermaterdeactivated16520210

outta my way gayboy im boutta get it

🕶 monstermaterdeactivated16520210

i have drowned at sea

36,251 notes

⚓ shiveringtimbers Follow

14,811 notes

🌏 boat-enthusiast Follow

i am SO sick of the term “ship-shape” like, matey, which shape?? Ships come in so many fucking shapes like have non of you ever boarded more than one vessel in your career???? Anyway fake ship fans DNI with this post i can NOT be bothered with your tomfuckery today

💦 longjohngolder Follow

girl its not that deep ☠

🌏 boat-enthusiast Follow

to YOU. i just get it

1,147 notes

🙍‍♂️ dudeindistress Follow

honestly being held for ransom isnt that bad. kinda nice to be held

4,733 notes

🦜 pollypockets Follow

SQUAWK

🐦 aviated Follow

CAW SQUAWK SQUAWK

🦜 pollypockets Follow

CA-CAW

790 notes

🍑 plundermebooty Follow

the cabin boy just winked at me?? after offering to help clean my gun? privately. in my quarters. tonight.

🍑 plundermebooty Follow

i think i hauve scurvy

142 notes

🌊 swabmydick Follow

mateys I SWEARR my captain and his first mate are gonna kiss before our next voyage. they literally have so much romantic tension every time i see them its nauseating

🕶 longjohngolderdeactivated16511205

wtf its so problematic and harmful to ship real people?? unfollowing rn i thought you were better than this

🌊 swabmydick Follow

i literally rob and kill people for a living?????? that’s where you draw the line???

🌴 pegmeg

op killed them

🌊 swabmydick Follow

even better news mateys, they kissed ☠☠☠

96,538 notes

@fake-post-archive

fake post archive

stavvers:

gothic-cepho:

this is officially my favourite election picture ever taken

please you simply cannot just crop out the other details that turn the whole scene into an allegorical painting. the defeated look as he gives his victory speech. binface looming in the corner, mostly out of shot. the sad fascist who didn’t get what he wanted. the fact the former pm appears the same size as the ventriloquist dummy.

Rishi sunak standing looking defeated at a podium. A person with a funny outfit and a ventriloquist doll stands near him, as does a man with a bin on his head. A guy in sunglasses holds up a sign saying LALT

maviyenot:

lindenattic:

solongavalon:

fag and dyke does not mean man and woman. transmasc and transfem does not mean man and woman. guy and girl dont even mean man and woman to me anymore

if we work hard enough we can achieve a world where even man and woman don’t mean man and woman anymore

cometiny:

Being autistic and also a Hyperpop/breakcore/ect enjoyer is really funny bc the sounds of being outside in the real world are often so tiring to me but if I wanna unwind and have a good time I will listen to the the most unnatural noises conjured up by evil computers and specifically designed to make your head explode. awesome

demilypyro:

ladycrappo:

Mixed signals.

barrebabyofthescrewedupclick:

grave-ghost-account:

Just thinking of the past…

thesituation:

thesituation:

sorry i don’t think ill ever get past the blatant racism in the fact that the italian and irish mobs are heavily romanticized and almost idolized while latino/african american mobs and gangs are seen as the scum of the earth who single handedly ruin society. not saying either is good or anything but the absolute polar opposite way that white organized crime vs non-white organized crime is treated by media and white society is fucking nuts to me. just blatant stone cold hypocrisy

like white people organized crime is cool and sexy and movies and tv shows about it are classics (the godfather, the sopranos) but if black or latino people have organized crime and make music about it then it’s the reason society is collapsing or whatever and it’s glorifying violence. what if everything was equally nuanced

fartbong-rewritten:

Go My Rottweiler Go

drtanner:

catasters:

Yeah, that’s a normal way to do that.

dduane:

delyth-thomas-art:

alymccart:

dduane:

nockergeek:

shinisenko:

My partner and I cancelled our Adobe accounts today because of this. Imagine if makers of physical art media had the right to pilfer your sketchbooks because you used their pencils and paints. That’s basically what Adobe is trying to foist on everyone.

These guys are way too famous for overreach. WTF.

Here’s how to cancel for free

Just reblogging this for those interested.

liongrl321:

lyri-da-suprstar:

consumerofbread424:

masqiscool:

mcrratthing:

yahooo-official:

definitely-mihoyo:

workplacefire:

not-a-trampoline-daily:

accidental-tally-hall-reference:

yeah I’m tally hall trust /j

guys im actually a chicken drumstick

I am a lig- I mean lemon

I am Hatsune miku

i am also Hatsune Miku

I am the album danger days only somehow more non-binary. Definitely.

i might be duality duo 🔥

Guys i am definitely hooty from the owl house

I’m totally a cat with headphones

oh yes

i am definitely a old lion drawing on flipaclip from 4 years ago

I am a :D

Ok, so we all saw the post about how we shouldn’t use this thing

A tumblr advertisment for a service named Koko. The ad's caption reads as follows:

Peer-to-peer support - free, anonymous, and available 24/7, right here on Tumblr.

The caption is then followed by an image that resembles a chat. The messages in this chat all come from Koko and read as follows:

Hi! I'm Koko

Need support? Just some kind words? I can connect you to other Tumblr users like you.

Click 'Message Now' to begin. It's free and anonymousALT

But I was too curious, I just wanted to see how it functions, not use it for its intended use. So I clicked “message now”

But then

A screenshot showing a webpage. This page is created by the uBlock Origin ad blocker and informs the user of the fact that the user was blocked from accessing a link because it is contained in the list of internet domains that are blocked.

The link that was blocked is extremely long and the end of it is not seen on the screen.ALT

The link that it opened was to some “smart ad server” and upon further inspection, the link contains every single tag I follow separated by “%3d”

What the hell

stavvers:

gothic-cepho:

this is officially my favourite election picture ever taken

please you simply cannot just crop out the other details that turn the whole scene into an allegorical painting. the defeated look as he gives his victory speech. binface looming in the corner, mostly out of shot. the sad fascist who didn’t get what he wanted. the fact the former pm appears the same size as the ventriloquist dummy.

Rishi sunak standing looking defeated at a podium. A person with a funny outfit and a ventriloquist doll stands near him, as does a man with a bin on his head. A guy in sunglasses holds up a sign saying LALT

fr3sh-c0rn:

Tma is funny because the main character is literally a dude who will die if he doesn’t tell me a bedtime story

spiribia:

i would be a kittypet all the way in the warrior cats universe. if i heard a bunch of guys were in the woods killing each other for survival and they think i’m the lame one for getting mediocre banquets i would be like you guys are stupidd and then when the thunderclan medicine cat comes by my fenced lot to pick yarrow i would be like what are you doing and shes like medicine so my clanmates don’t die and i’m like wow you guys really have it that rough. and she keeps encountering me and one day i’m like why don’t you come inside there’s plenty of kibble and she averts her eyes shyly and is like …no that would be against starclan and i’d go To have a little kibble? and she’s like You know what i mean. and i do. 5 moons later she is getting adopted by my people and visions of her ancestors still haunt her and she is from time to time like Did I do the right thing…? how could i be so selfish…? and i’m like my toy mouse squeaks

mosteviltf2enjoyer:

guess who beat the gameeee

i lob them

opens-up-4-nobody:

:-P

cryptotheism:

It is not brave or edgy. I consider it a baseline moral duty to make fun of the Catholic Church.

a-meh:

assignedmale:

assignedmale:

assignedmale:

chwylaven:

Heartbeat

Combat own emotions with your favourite ship, yessir

whiskeyote:

kaijuno:

iguessweallcrazyithinktho:

March 24, 2023, at 2:07 p.m. PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) — Walter C. Cole, better known as the iconic drag queen who performed for decades as Darcelle XV, has died of natural causes in Portland, Oregon.

Cry because she’s gone. But please also happy cry because she made it to 92. I am so glad, in a sense, to be mourning a queer elder who actually got to be an elder. This is a success story as told by an entire, whole, complete human lifetime. Rest in peace, Darcelle. I can’t imagine the struggles you have seen, the oppression you have overcome, and the life experience you’re taking with you to the other side. We love you. And we are so glad you made it to 92.

i-say-ok:

reversewerewolf:

calocera:

mime down…

ok.

socialistexan:

ranked-competitive-sexhaver:

argumate:

toastpiercer-deactivated2020080:

could it be…? a good political cartoon?

The artist is Clay Bennett, a Pulitzer Prize winner and a veteran of his craft. Here’s some more of his work: 

The wire hanger one hit me like a ton of bricks.

cleopatraxi:

Trump didn’t die bc all the good hitmen are booked by Boeing rn

ur-daily-inspiration:

draconym:

Two panels: Draconym is sitting in the grass and says "Hey, God? Can I have the power to bring back dead things?"ALT
The voice of God appears as gothic text and dramatic lighting, saying "Yeah, okay. Sure." Draconym looks at their hands and replies, "thanks."ALT
In their hands is a dead cicada. It snaps back to life, confused, then flies away.ALT
God's voice returns, asking, "Is this what you really wanted to do with that." Draconym, surrounded by resurrected insects, tearfully says, "yeah ..."ALT

My dreams haven’t really been subtle lately.

ane-doodles:

Swap AU (i suppose?)

Still figuring out some things but hey!

metaphoricallyrose:

Marcille relearning her native language takes a turn

ccarmody101:

Oops

bettsplendens:

dallasrecklessandrelentless:

That fuckin smile at the end

To the worried person in the comments: 

No, a hummingbird’s heart will not stop if it stops moving. You’re possibly thinking of Spoink, which is a Pokemon that supposedly powers its heart by bouncing, and as such can’t stop moving. Hummingbirds don’t sit often because they’re busy looking for food, but they can and do sit. The females sit on eggs in nests, after all, and they do have to sleep. 

cconfusedkat:

Not only during Pride Month but they can finally be 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 together

cybersongstrawberry:

Had to draw them

the-haiku-bot:

lilithtransrights:

alpacaradio:

zombeesknees:

#just think   #when this gifset first passed my dash   #however long ago that was   #I didn’t even recognize the name Elon Musk   #what I wouldn’t give to return to that innocence

the character of Elon Musk was inspired by Tony Stark, and it always has been.

The character of Elon Musk was inspired by Justin Hammer

The character of

Elon Musk was inspired

by Justin Hammer

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.