my dick is small and my mental illness is debilitating. from this, i can surmise that it’s not my penis which stores mental illness, but something else entirely
Tim’s a firefighter who adopts a baby dragon called Bash! Adorable chaos ensues… 👩🚒
Tim’s secret ambition is to train Bash to be used in the fire service, whilst Bash’s secret ambition is to steal all of Tim’s gold. Little does he know, Tim is poor… 😳
You can read our comics and find out more about us here 👇
So I’ve been watching Regular Show recently and I’m surprised by the lack of gamer jokes targeted towards Mordecai and Rigby.
Decided to fix that!
You know who else is surprised by the lack of gamer jokes targeted towards Mordecai and Rigby?
[fan art id: mordecai and rigby sitting on their couch, each holding a controller, presumably playing a video game. mordecai says, “what’s your opinion on gay marriage?”, and rigby replies, “as far as i’m concerned, all marriage is ‘gay’ marriage.” end id]
Tim’s a firefighter who adopts a baby dragon called Bash! Adorable chaos ensues… 👩🚒
Tim’s secret ambition is to train Bash to be used in the fire service, whilst Bash’s secret ambition is to steal all of Tim’s gold. Little does he know, Tim is poor… 😳
You can read our comics and find out more about us here 👇
“i really really like this art” i say with a blank face and no vocal intonation. but if you opened my chest like a hatch 16 demons would come flying out and spit acid everywhere and claw up the carpet
Nigel Farage got milkshaked again, what a time to be alive
ALT
What an icon
So that’s how one’s milkshake brings all the boys to the yard
And they’re like “you splattered Farage”
To clarify, the Mail is a sex-work shaming hard-right rag that dug up Victoria Bowen’s OF in an attempt to smear someone who humiliated their precious Brexit overlord, she didn’t bring it up but they thought they could use it against her.
Victoria, meanwhile:
ALT
Is in on this joke.
(This is a crop because sexual content, no judgement, it’s literally her job, it’s just not my bag; full image has link to her website victb.co.uk and Twitter handle EssexBunny - as well as, you know, the rest of the photo; you know where to go if you want it.)
that’s from a now-suspended impersonation account, though the website matches the bio of the real account:
soooo people saying i threw a milkshake to promote my onlyfans 😂😂 how ridiculous.
my name and photos were published without my consent, i didn’t even know my OF was mentioned until late last night. i specifically didn’t give my name for a reason. i didn’t mention my page or any of my social media when i was approached by journalists immediately after the incident.
YES i threw a milkshake, YES i do onlyfans, NO they are NOT linked in any way. :)
another workout-intense day, another one from the set to try: fourth in the poll, time to check out the goat. the patchouli, of course, might haunt me, but my hopes are high. I’m surprised it scored so low, too, as I assumed my love for goats would nudge you to put it higher on the list.
also, bezdroża translated into mountain dresses and obłąkanie into dreams. you know what, I’ll take it.
oh my shit fucking gods
immediately after using: well it smells like a fucking goat alright
two hours in: don’t know what else to tell ya, boss. it’s just smells like a goat
and I mean it, wholeheartedly. if you’ve ever been around goats - especially if you’ve ever milked them or had anything to do with processing their milk - it just straight up smells like a goat. spot on. warm and pungent fur, bits of hay, heavy smell of milk and half-digested grass, just all around a godsdamned goat.
it’s thrilling. it makes me retch, yes, but it’s so fucking cool! just a goat essence in a vial!
three hours in: alright! things are happening! the goat scent is gone (or at least I think it is? my love doesn’t know how a goat smells so they can’t help me judge) and it’s pleasantly woody and leathery now. the patchouli isn’t too overwhelming and the oud is nice, low, warm. it’s less sweet than the previous ones from the set which is very welcome. a bit mossy, a bit floral. interesting going from a stinky goat to this, honestly.
many hours of wearing: pleasant and warm, leathery, with low and nice sweet notes of clove and vetiver. slightly… ordinary, really, but then you remember that you reeked of an old sun-warmed goat for three hours or so, and it makes much more exciting and curious.
head to head with wisent when it comes to being a genuinely different and animalistic fragrance.
happy birthday to that post. tried the goat again today and yes, it still smells like a goat 👍🐐
Hey so it’s come to my attention that the Creators of Disco Elysium want you to share the game and not give the company who took over and fired them (illegally)?) any profits off of their ideas and work, and I originally joined tumblr 2 weeks ago when that post was going around about the Steam sale and how you should [Skull and Crossbones flag] it instead.
So.
in light of that.
Check the replies/notes of this post :)
I was informed that posts containing links in them aren’t findable in the search so i’ll just…. drop a link in a seperate reboot :)
first things first though, copy this key:
q4-EJ9G2DV7MYYI-Vs0KdQ
here’s the edited version with the captal YY in the key above!
you call this place “wall greens” yet its walls… are not green? how very pecuilar…
ah i see now. so “walgreen” was a clan of bandits who conquered various, smaller apothecaries in order to acquire the vast empire they now sit upon. how very cruel, this “america”. you are ruled by warlords and do nothing to usurp them?
you call this place “wall greens” yet its walls… are not green? how very pecuilar…
ah i see now. so “walgreen” was a clan of bandits who conquered various, smaller apothecaries in order to acquire the vast empire they now sit upon. how very cruel, this “america”. you are ruled by warlords and do nothing to usurp them?
there’s nothing wrong with finding gay sex sexy, even if you’re straight. sex is sex. if a woman is attracted to men, it stands to reason that she might get turned on watching two dudes mack each other’s faces off. vice versa. that’s neither weird nor news to anyone. what is weird and fucked up is consuming queer sexuality without respect for the very-real human beings who are having the queer sex
and yes, that shit is prevalent and aggravating as hell! i get it. but criticizing how people derive pleasure (“she’s evil because she thinks gay-man-sex is hot even though she’s a woman”) rather than how they abuse power (“she thinks gay-man-sex is hot, and consumes queer media in queer spaces, but she also maintains that lesbians are gross and weird and uses her platform to talk over them”) is a recipe for weird puritanical nonsense that solves zero problems and in fact creates several new ones
One of my roommates is from China and neither of us speaks the other’s language but lately when she’s in a chatty mood she comes into our kitchen and shows me these douyin Matt Damon x Ben Affleck RPF videos and puts her theories about how Ben has been pining for Matt into google translate for me to read. fujoing out transcends language barriers
I wrote a longass thing about kink and pride and how people are trapping themselves in a closet of their own making and getting mad at everyone else for not similarly engaging in normative sexuality but I deleted it. I deserve some kind of reward… dubloons perhaps
Hahaha okay I’ll just say one brief thing [handing back some doubloons] queer people who happily engage in the whole “Eww i hate these icky degenerate other queers, we’re normal unlike them” the gates of heaven are closed to you and you will never be happy defining yourself solely by the Aesthetic Du Jour and what you are Not (the caricature of queerness that right wingers have crafted) and I think deep down you know that too
Call me crazy, but I don’t think the people that use Pride Month as an excuse to expose non-consenting adults and sometimes children to their fetishes and be gross in public are the arbiters of who goes to heaven and not.
I’m gonna be as polite as possible:
1) You have almost entirely imagined this group of people. They do not exist. You have fallen for a specific caricature of gay people as sexual predators designed by homophobic right wingers. I would take a second to pause and take a step back and wonder what basis in reality your fears about exhibitionists exploiting kids at Pride have.
2) Gross does not mean harm. Part of living in a public space means learning to distinguish between the two. The temptation to conflate it in order to lend moral credence to your feelings of disgust is powerful but it doesn’t make it valid. People will see a gay couple chastely hold hands and be overwhelmed with feelings of disgust. They will see a gay couple give each other a peck on the cheek and think it’s the grossest thing they’ve ever seen in their lives. Disgust alone can’t be the sole measure of what is and isn’t allowed in public spaces.
3) Sorry to dig up old discourse, but unfortunately there is a difference between “performing” kink and engaging in kink. A person in a dog mask at Pride is, most likely, not necessarily titilated by the activity or feeling aroused in a particular way. Same with people in leather. They’re almost certainly just preoccupied with advertising their lifestyles to other queer kinksters in the same way that anyone in a rainbow tee is. Why do you think people wearing leather to Pride are secretly getting off to it? Have you ever spoken to them? Because you’ll find their primary emotion, at least in my experience, is largely variations on a theme of “It’s so fucking hot here and I wanna go home and shower and get a vodka soda.” They’re not like, secretly nutting. Seeing someone in leather gear is not “participating” in their kink any more than seeing someone in a rainbow shirt is participating in their gay relationship. You can’t “not” consent to seeing someone in leather gear any more than you can “not” consent to seeing someone in a shirt that says like, “I love blowjobs.”
3) Pride isn’t “for” kids. This isn’t to say kids aren’t welcome; rather, as an event it did not originate as an activity or gathering catered towards kids. Its rules and goals were never formed with children in mind. I would again urge you to consider why you think Pride is an event that needs to cater to children and why you think a statistically significant number of them are attending Pride specifically with the children in attendance in mind.
people will read books they Do Not Like™ and then wonder why they hate reading
“i don’t like long books” read short ones. “i don’t like prose” try poetry. “i don’t want to pay for a book i might not even like” go to your local library.
reading is the hobby that you make it; make it something you like.
seeing this mentioned in the tags, but for the love of all that is good and holy please stop making yourself read books you don’t like. you know yourself better than any curation or recommendation, if you’re not enjoying it, you can put it down.
reading for leisure is supposed to be fun. you can’t have fun if you’re actively robbing yourself of joy while you do it!
Adding to this - if you are reading a book and it’s not required for work, school or university, and you are Not Enjoying It… You Can Stop Reading It. No one is going to penalise you. No one is going to tell you off. No one is going to take away your good grade in reading. You can stop reading it. Return it to the library if it was a library book. Give it away, to a friend, to a charity/thrift shop/second hand book shop, eBay, Amazon, whatever. Chuck it out if it was that bad. Was it for a book club? Turning up to the book club and going ‘could not finish this, it was awful’ might be a valid response, or alternately you could just skip out on it. A friend is pressuring you to read it? Just tell them it’s not your thing, maybe they could summarise the key takeaways they wanted you to see?
Life is too short to force yourself to read things you really don’t care about and don’t need to read.
