was really mad that the couches in the lobby at my work got removed :( then I remembered that most days I open there’s someone sleeping on them, meaning someone reported that to housekeeping and their “solution” was to remove the couches entirely?? I was pissed about it, then noticed this sign today
ALT
the removal of comfort in public spaces to ‘deter’ homeless people impacts everyone
edit: just to be clear, housekeeping didn’t put up the sign, no one knows who did. it’s since been removed
Stomach: hey, what do we have here? Some goddamned lactose!
Small intestine: we don’t like lactose here, ya know? You’re gatecrashing a very private party!
Large intestine: (pushes him, making him stumble) there’s two ways you can leave here… The easy way, or the hard way. What’s it gonna be?
Lactose: but I…
Lactase: (deep voice) step back, everyone. (walks up and puts his arm around lactose’s shoulders) he’s with *me*
Large intestine: lactase?!
Small intestine: b-but you’re both…
Lactase: I *said* he’s with me. You got a problem with that?
Stomach: (finishes sizing him up) right. Course not. It’s cool, lactose. Just don’t cause any *problems*, you hear?
Lactose: I-I w-
Lactase: you don’t have to answer that, babe. Just keep walking
nobody fucking appreciates me
I appreciate the fact that later in the evening, lactase is gonna grab the entire length of lactose’s structure with its active site and then break lactose in half.
women should lift weights because it prevents osteoporosis in old age and makes you a more capable person in everyday life please shut up about butts and waists and hourglasses i’m going to fucking kill
;___;♡♡♡♡
Hi there! I worked in a PT clinic for a while and I’m currently studying physical therapy! Here’s what I’ve learned from both school and my time working with patients with bone density concerns:
(just to cover my legal bases i am NOT a doctor nor am I giving medical advice. My intent as a med student is to inform people so they can make their own decisions and perform further research about the condition. Please talk to your doctor or primary care provider before beginning any treatment, exercise routine, etc.)
In anatomy Wolff’s Law states that a bone will remodel itself in response to stresses placed upon it. What this means for your health is if you put (appropriate and safe) weight bearing through your bones your body will deposit more calcium and collagen into those bones to compensate for increased stress. On the flip side, if you DON’T lift weights (again, within appropriate and safe parameters) the human body has a ‘use it or lose it’ mindset. Your body is constantly breaking down and building your bones to maintain blood calcium homeostasis and if your body doesn’t think it needs the extra calcium in bones it’s gonna break it down for the various uses throughout the rest of the body.
PREVENTION IS YOUR BEST FRIEND. If you know osteoporosis/osteopenia runs in your family please talk to your doctor/health care provider or other medical professional about safe weight lifting/workout options for you. ALSO if you already HAVE osteoporosis/osteopenia please talk to your PCP or physical therapist for a plan of treatment! A lot of older women have the misconception that since their bones are brittle they cannot perform weight bearing exercises when in fact the opposite is true! Your body will lay down more calcium and collagen with an appropriate exercise routine.
This is potentially life saving information everyone should know.
No you guys this post helped me find my cat. He was missing for almost a month and I’ve had him for over 12 years. After seeing this I put his favorite blanket he always slept on outside hoping he would smell mine or his scent and he was back the next fucking day asleep on it.
When my cat got out, we called and called for him, and then, later that night, I remembered similar advice to this, and so put his little scratching pad, which he adores, on the front porch. Not even half an hour later, I heard a thump, opened the door, and there was his big butt, meowing at me.
Important and vital
I don’t care that I reblogged this today I’m reblogging it again
This is an exception to not being related to writing.
I hope this helps somebody
Whenever someone in one of my buy swap sell groups reports a missing cat, I remember this post and pass the advice on. So far, ALL of the missing cats have come home.
[ID: A digital informational poster. Text: “HOW TO FIND A LOST DOG. On day 12 of searching for my dog in a heavily wooded area, distraught and hopeless, I ran into a couple of hunters. They said they lost the occasional dog on a hunt but always got them back. What they told me has helped many dogs and families be reunited. The dog owner(s) should take an article of clothing that has been worn at least all day, the longer the better, so the lost dog can pick up the scent. Bring the article of clothing to the location where the dog was last seen and leave it there. Also, if the dog has a crate and familiar toy, you can bring those too (unless location undesirable for crate). You might also want to leave a note requesting item(s) not to be moved. Leave a bowl of water there too, as the dog probably hasn’t had access to any. Do not bring food as this could attract other animal that the dog might avoid. Come back the next day, or check intermittently if possible. Hopefully the dog will be waiting there. I was skeptical and doubted my dog would be able to detect an article of clothing if he didn’t hear me calling his name as loud as possible all day for 12 days. But I returned the next day and sure enough found him sitting there! I hope this helps someone out there who’s missing a best friend. Good luck :)” End ID]
I have been quoting this tiktok for the past two weeks.
This bitch had like 5 accents
transcription:
“you’re a nice guy. (shifts to singsongy british accent) i’ll think about it maybe xo baybeoi uh oh eehjfgoi SHEND HIM KISSHEOIS. i didn’t know i would moive in with his missusWOOOOOT GET A LOIFE WE’RE LIVIN WITH HIS WOIFE like.. (disturbingly serene) what was i meant to do…? ehehehe. (sudden american accent) oh bitch oi seemBUHHURH BREAST KILLA?? mm. HEHEHEHEHEHE (back to british accent) she doied. that’s what she desehves. (sudden new yorker accent) this stoopid princess bitch has been fuckin goin against me since i downloaded this goddamn app. she’s like (peppa pig again) oih you’re heare? no problemm. an- oo OO OOOHOHOHOHOOO OHOHOHOHO HOHOHOWAAAAAAAAA!!!!! ….oh i was first heh!”
you’re a nice guy 👨💼! I’ll think 🤔 about it MAY-BEE🐝. X O 🤗💋 baybwee👶! UH OH here we go 🚀🚀🚀! SHENDS HIM KISSES😘😘😘! I didn’t know that I would move in with his Mrs.👰 WHUUT😲! GET A LIFE! You were living with his wife 👱♀️like what was I meant to do🤷♀️? Oh bitch 💃obviously- BUH HWUH BREASTKILLUH 🔪🙍♀️! Yeet ✌️! hehehehehehe 🤣🤣🤣🤣 she DIED 😵. It’s what she deserves 💁♀️. this STOOPID princess 👸 bitch 🐕 has been fuckin goin against me since I downloaded this goddamn app 📱. She’s like, “OH yaw here, no PRAWBlem!” eh OO OO 😮OOOoOooOO 😩😩😩😩OOOOoo 😱oOO😱oooo 😱O😱😱OO😱OOO WHAAAAAA🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 Oh I was first heh!🥇🏆
told my cabbie for the 3am airport trip that I was feeling a bit nauseous and he immediately took my bag away from me and said “Trip to the airport is 12 dollars. I’ll drive slow.” and then he did– no fast corners, very gentle stops at the lights. and I was willing to pay the extra few dollars for it, but when the meter hit $12 he clicked stop and let me ride the rest of the way free. and it might just be the insanity of waking up at 2:30 after 4 hours of sleep but I was really emotional about it. Like ok Mr Sandeep, the world is still good actually.
fucking adhd. I have to run a con on my own brain to get anything done.
I’m staging everything I’ll need to do paperwork and a stressful phone call, real sneaky-like so as not to alert my brain to the plan. Going into the kitchen for coffee and casually turning on my computer as I pass. Telling myself I’m just picking up these papers so I don’t step on them. Planting my favorite pen in a strategic position.
Later, I’ll subtly imply that completing this task is quick, it’s easy, and it’s free. And then I’ll see everything laid out and think “well, surely a little 5-minute trial run won’t hurt, and of course I can stop if I want to.” and that’s when the bear traps will be activated.
and maybe you’re thinking nobody would fall for that but lemme tell ya: I know the mark and he’s a real goober. you can trick him into taking pills just by placing them on top of a package of mint oreos. he doesn’t even question it, just finds the pills on his way to the cookies and goes “sure, why not?”
the way my partner talks about my ocd is so hilariously on point. for context, i experience a lot of verbal compulsions (feeling like i Have to Say a Certain Thing to magically fix another) and he just told me. “most of the time it’s easy to spot a compulsion cause literally nobody asked”
i’ll tell him that i want to watch a movie and then I’ll specify out loud “you do not have to comply with my wish, but it was good to freely express it just as it is good for you to freely refute it” and he will look at me dead in the eye and say “who asked. compulsion”. it’s just brutal
this is genuinely such good OCD treatment partnership though. acknowledging the compulsion & refusing to participate in the OCD narrative & reassurance loop. we love to see informed support.
The look on my boyfriend’s face when I read this to him tells me I’m going to be hearing “Who asked? Compulsion.” a LOT.
In 1970, my mother’s family adopted an intellectually disabled man named Horace. Horace was 56, and had been in an institution since 1921.
My uncle, who was 19, was working as an orderly at the institution where Horace lived. He only stayed a few months as the abuse he witnessed was too much for him. He had become friends with Horace and told him “I’ll come back for you.”
Horace replied “They all say that.”
By that Christmas, Horace lived with my uncle and his family. My grandparents did the official adoption. Horace had never seen a Christmas tree, and that was his first real Christmas.
Horace died in 2010, at the age of 96. He laid down for a nap and just slipped away.
At least two generations of children grew up with him. He felt immortal to us. He loved Hot Wheels, pizza, cartoons and to talk to the portrait of my grandparents as he sat in his rocking chair.
He knew everyone’s birthday. He loved unconditionally.
He had scars on his back from the institutions. If you asked him about that place, his face would screw up and he’d say “oh, it was a bad place. Bad place.”
And for 40 years, he was safe, loved, and happy. He loved us in return.
No point to sharing this. But I still miss his laugh as he held a conversation with a portrait, whispering about his day to the people who had helped rescue him.
Memories of Horace:
He’d put anything in his pockets. This included pizza.
He would walk around the dining room table for hours, talking. The floor had shuffle marks.
I was forever called “the baby” because that’s how he had met me.
We always joked that he would be the luckiest man in the world and would just die one day in his sleep. He did.
We also always joked that he had a free pass into heaven. He did.
Oh my god. 😭💕💕💕 The response to this in so little time is wonderful.
Horace deserved the world and I’m so happy his story moves people. Thank you for remembering him with me.
Apparently the second founder of oceangate wants to work on sending people to Venus by 2050 and I am honestly impressed by the delusion of rich white men. Like sir, your company just killed 5 people spectacularly, it has been talked about for weeks, your co-founder was among them. You are about to drown in lawsuits, the only place you will be sending people is to court.
Ok, God, I am fucking wheezing, I got trained to work with mice today since I’ll need them for some experiments and the guy who trained me was like, “Yeah ok so if there’s a day where you just absolutely cannot get your mice to cooperate you can always do this” and picks up this cone-shaped bag and just put the mouse face-first into it and shows it to me and I lose my shit because deadass it was a piping-bag of mouse. Like, the whole mouse was pressed into this cone, fur and ears and feet all pressed up against the plastic, tail sticking up absurdly out of the top of the thing. It was so unimaginably fucking funny but like the mouse was perfectly ok with it, there’s a hole for air at the bottom so she could breathe and all but it was genuinely the most absurd thing I have witnessed in months
THIS IS FUCKING IT, IT’S SO FUCKING RIDICULOUS!!!!!
you will be turned to icing if you don’t start acting correctally.
personally I think that if we make something legal, everyone who’s in jail for breaking the previous law should be released. I can’t believe that’s not a common sense belief.
why? because we’ve clearly decided that what they did is fine, since we just made it legal.
but they still committed a crime! it was illegal then, and they broke the law! except “breaking the law” isn’t the bad action. the bad action is the thing that’s illegal. if “breaking the law” was the issue, then all crimes would be equal.
we don’t punish people for breaking the law. we punish them for doing something bad. if we as a society have declared something that used to be illegal now legal, then we’ve decided it’s not a bad thing. so we should stop punishing people for it.
it’s fucking ridiculous (and yes this is about weed)
Idk I’m tired of people thinking that astroturfing is unique to one group. Astroturfing is so universal that there were specialized campaigns to destroy all the organizations trained to educate the public on how astroturfing campaigns work.
The same tactics I’m seeing now were the same tactics used to divide and destroy the 2014-2016 Black Lives Matter movement. (To the point where the 2020 Black Lives Matter movement is seen as a separate and new thing, and “Say Their Name” campaigns predate 2014.)
The same tactics I’m pretty sure were used against immigration reform movements.
These tactics just keep being recycled because everyone thinks they only ever apply to the groups they already belong to—and it doesn’t count when they’re used against others.
jason: how can you ever tell the difference between all the fancy forks?
tim: it’s really not that hard, the salad fork is smaller than the dinner fork, the cake fork has three prongs, oh there’s also the lobster fork and fish fork and…
jason: of course you know all this rich boy being raised with a silver spoon and all that elitist bs
tim: you know my parents forced me to go to etiquette school…
jason: and im supposed to feel bad for you?
tim: i still have my flashcards
jason: oh that would be great actually can i have those
Jesse: “Yo, Mr. Fring, I’ve been thinking about this quote, man. "One must imagine Sisyphus happy.” What do you make of that?“
Gus: ”Ah, Jesse, I see you’ve stumbled upon the existential musings of Albert Camus. It’s an intriguing concept, to say the least.“
Gus: ”Sisyphus, condemned to an eternity of rolling a boulder uphill only to watch it roll back down again, represents the futility and absurdity of life’s struggles.“
Gus: ”However, Camus suggests that by accepting and embracing this absurdity, one can find happiness.“
Jesse: ”Yeah, but I mean, isn’t that just some crazy philosophical bullshit? How can someone be happy in such a fucked-up situation?“
Gus: ”Happiness, Jesse, is a state of mind. It’s not about the circumstances we find ourselves in, but rather how we choose to perceive and respond to them.“
Gus: ”Sisyphus, despite his eternal struggle, can find meaning and purpose in his repetitive task. By embracing his fate and finding fulfillment in the act itself, he transcends the burden he carries.“
Jesse: ”That’s deep shit, man. So, what, you’re saying we should just accept all the crap that comes our way and be happy about it?“
Gus: ”Not necessarily. Acceptance doesn’t mean complacency. It means acknowledging the realities of our situation and finding a way to navigate them while maintaining our inner peace.“
Gus: ”It’s about finding meaning in the journey, even if the destination remains elusive.“
Jesse: ”Yeah? I guess that makes sense in some messed-up, twisted way… Hey, speaking of finding happiness, have you tried Taco Bell’s Nacho Fries? They’re insane, man!“
Gus: ”…Nacho Fries, Mr. Pinkman?“
Jesse: ”Oh, you gotta try ‘em, Mr. Fring! They’re like these crispy, seasoned fries with this gooey cheese dipping sauce. It’s like a flavor explosion in your mouth, man. I bet you’d love 'em.“
Gus: ”If they are as remarkable as you claim, perhaps we can find a moment to indulge.
After all, even in the face of existential ponderings, we mustn’t forget to appreciate life’s simpler pleasures.“
Jesse: ”That’s what I’m talkin’ about, Mr. Fring! We’ll have ourselves a little culinary adventure amidst all the fucking chaos.
Life’s all about finding those moments of joy, even if it means embracing the absurdity along the way, right?“
Gus: ”Indeed, Jesse. Life’s contradictions often lead us to unexpected discoveries. Perhaps, we may find a glimpse of Sisyphus’ elusive happiness in the process.“
Y’ever read something and have understanding that has eluded you interminably suddenly stop, curl up, and snuggle neatly into a fold in your brain because a new way way opened to it?
I’ve seen this passed around a few times, and I have one thing to say:
It’s online. The book was carefully and wonderfully recreated online by hand. You can find it here. The entire book is this easy.
The first pride my mother attended, she marched with me alongside the PFLAG float, holding a sign that read “I’m Proud of My Gay Child”.
I noticed she kept falling behind and running to catch up, nearly a whole float behind us. So finally, I stopped to see what was going on.
People kept pointing at her sign and cheering and then she’d proudly point at me, saying “they’re here!”
That was usually the point where at least one person burst into tears. And this is where my mom started lagging - because she’d stop, reach over the barrier, and hug them. Teenagers, twenty-somethings, thirty-somethings… they’d break down crying at the sight of a cishet woman proudly marching with her child in Texas, of all places. That she’d claim me and be proud of me. Because they couldn’t imagine their own family doing the same.
So she stopped and hugged them and told them she was proud of them, even though she had to race to catch up in the heat, even though they were strangers. And i like to think she made those young people’s lives a bit better.
So yes, cishets at pride.
I’d rather have a cishet grandma there than a gay cop.
A: Snake behavior has been generally neglected as a field of research, especially in Brazil. And most studies don’t examine what factors make them want to bite. If you study malaria, you can research the parasite that causes the disease—but if you don’t study the mosquito that carries it, you will never solve the problem. Up until now, the popular wisdom was that the jararaca would only attack if you touched it or stepped on it. But that was not what we found.
Q: Why did you need to be the victim?
A: The best way to do this research is to put snakes and a human together. In this case, the human was me. We put the snakes inside a ring on the floor of our lab until they got used to it, then I stepped in wearing special protective boots. I stepped close to the snake and also lightly on top of it. I didn’t put my whole weight on my foot, so I did not hurt the snakes. I tested 116 animals and stepped 30 times on every animal, totaling 40,480 steps.]
ADHD at night: I could write a book. I could get my Master’s Degree. I could go to the club and come home with 12 new friends. I could get a job at that club and meet the mother of my children. I could cure every disease and use my wealth to bring world peace.
ADHD during the day: Fold laundry too hard :( Come back next week
ALT
![[Image ID: a 4chan greentext from 04/23/18 that says:
>be girl
>middle school, early 2000s
>walking to class
>see some short kid getting shoved into the locker
>tiny little hispanic kid and his two goons are harrassing this kid for lunch money
>is this real life
>take the little hispanic kid and put him in a chicken hold
>tell him if he touches this kid again I'll beat his face into the locker so hard his parents wont be able to recognize him
>he calls his goons off, runs away
>short kid follows me around for the rest of the school year, carrying my books and taking care of my tamogotchi and letting me use his head as an armrest
a couple years ago I looked him up on facebook and found he publicly joined a "muscle girl appreciation" group." /. End ID]](../media/e0cde6cfce6d7eebb984aba66eb67ce7eb77629d.jpg)
![[Image ID: the words "muscle girl appreciation" in the style of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles logo. /. End ID]](../media/247025a59fde275d6cc3c9890aa9a69bf0284d61.png)
![[Image ID: the words "prowling pride for cishet grandmas" in the style of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles logo. /. End ID]](../media/05c24684e594dd05a51ee20c92ecbbc363022d26.png)
![[Image ID: the words "chaotic good snakebite science" in the style of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles logo. /. End ID]](../media/4bb8192cfb67c7af86a884dee16e108c570af56a.png)
