No harm to any religion. It’s just a lamp ads by an Australian company. However, it’s funny!
I’m going to cry 😂😂
Ahaha, the reason why Mohammad is specifically mentioned as not being able to be there is because in Islam, portrayals and portraits of Mohammad are forbidden. But they didn’t want to be seen as either hand waving him as at the table but not shown or as explicitly omitted.
Look, I firmly believe that anyone who still uses variations of “but Hamas” as a response to the daily horrifying documentation of this genocide is not saying it with conviction but rather as cover.
Because if it’s about Hamas, then why is Israel preventing cancer patients from leaving Gaza for treatment?
If it’s about Hamas, why is Israel preventing baby formula from entering the strip?
If it’s about Hamas, then why are children getting sniped in the head?
I can go on but that won’t be necessary because it’s abundantly clear that it’s not about Hamas, never been.
It’s imperative to understand that it’s not only us who know the answers to the above questions, but Zionists know them too, and they know we know that.
At this stage, and on day 256 of this acceleration of genocide, this so-called argument can only be viewed as a sick deflection to allow more war crimes to be committed against Palestinians, and absolutely nothing else.
Think, Narinder, think! By killing me and making my followers watch, you’ve alienated every single person who would’ve worshipped you. You’ll become a god to nothing. Nothing, Nari! I’ve dedicated my life to serving you and you’ve betrayed me!
I understand the appeal of wanting every adult hero to instinctively adopt teenage Peter Parker, but can it really beat the hilarity of acknowledging that at 15 Peter was 5'10", unusually buff, went by a moniker with Man in it, wore a creepy full face mask, and had a tightly guarded secret identity and probably a Queens accent thick enough to have come out of a jello mold, and adult heroes reasonably responded to him by going, “Wow, this grown man is an immature asshole for no reason.”
Way funnier to me than adult heroes finding out Peter is a teenager and becoming Concerned is the idea of adult heroes Retroactively finding out Peter Was a teenager because he admits to being like. 22 and they’re like “Hang on you’ve been doing this for like. Seven years.” and he’s like “Haha crazy right? Anyway it’s too late for you to yell at me about that because the statue of limitations on that lecture ran out when I turned 18”
YEAH this trope is instantly more tolerable if it’s fully adult Peter being like, *listen up whippersnappers because I’ve been around the block voice* “I’m thirty, and—” and Tony Stark, who vaguely assumed Spider-Man is maybe two years older than him because he just has that energy and hasn’t reassessed this for four presidential terms, is like, *drunkenly doing math* “You’re how many”
Okay but…them trying to talk about Old People Stuff with him, not realizing that he wasn’t alive to remember xyz thing happening, never used xyz technology bc he didn’t exist yet, not expecting him to agree with the fact that some ppl were saying songs they grew up to were oldies, etc
The thing about Peter Parker is that he was raised by senior citizens the way other heroes are raised by wolves. He has the body of an Olympic gymnast and the soul of a malcontented geriatric. This likely contributed to the perpetuation of the accidental ruse.
It’s when he channels Aunt May so hard he makes it sound like he was personally and immediately affected by McCarthyism that the time traveler fringe theory starts really picking up bets.
Pal, I JUST SAID he was raised by AUNT MAY.
Also not to get real on a ha ha comic post but the elderly are not your enemy. There are old progressives.
Peter has a lot of feelings about the woman that discovered DNA and he strikes me as the kind of person that thinks that distancing yourself from notable figures of history by using their last names is stupid, so he’s going to say something like, “Rosalind worked so fucking hard to have that work snatched from her,” immediately followed by, “I woulda thumped him good,” and inspiring Tony and Banner to frantically look through the 1930s and 40s yearbooks at King’s College and theorize which one was Spider-Man. Captain America tries reminiscing about the good ole days with him. Peter, for his part, has been absently agreeing and making vague “I’m listening” noises about the Rolling Stones and Elton John for the majority of his life, so adding baseball, Duke Ellington, and Ella Fitzgerald to the list wasn’t that much of a stretch.
There are only like three genuinely funny additions on this, but this is one of them.
captain america pushing a get out the vote campaign: ‘spiderman did you vote’
spider’man’ at 16: uhhhh so about that
“I…can’t.” “I see. That’s why it’s so important to restore voting rights to felons.”
That’s made funnier by the fact that I feel like Steve’s natural assumption would be that Spiderman’s a non-citizen, so him jumping straight to felon is like, Peter just has such strong criminal vibes.
Reminder that you’re actually interesting. Your hobbies are interesting, your interests are interesting, you are important and loveable and people appreciate you. You’re just a loveable, interesting person.
Richard Siken continues to kill it on twitter. He just explained why his poetry is so popular in tumblr graphics - “you can take any of my quotes and apply them to any fandom or picture and they will work because they are sad and mopey and full of longing” and then proceeded to demonstrate this. With cat pictures. With lines of his poetry slightly altered to be lol cat speak.
I think the funniest dynamic for arranged-marriage royalty would be a queen who came here 100% prepared to murder her future husband and rule as a widow queen in her own right, only to discover that the king is autistic as hell and responds to her wish to rule with “oh thank god please do, I don’t want to be bothered by these people. I can just tell them to go bother you instead, if you really want that. I’ve got beetles I wanted to study.”
“I’m really not good at it,” the king admits with horrible, aching grief. The country is in disarray. Peasants go hungry. Nobles trade power amongst themselves with impunity.
So the queen takes over and ruthlessly sets things to rights. Fires several generals, hangs nobles, redirects wealth to the peasantry. It isn’t long before the first assassination attempt, which she expected.
She did not expect her docile, beetle-obsessed husband to go absolutely feral and fling himself at the assassins wielding a pair of sharp knives.
Also, the beetles are intended to attack and kill a certain type of invasive worm that has been killing off the gourd and potato crops for decades. He’s been trying since he was a child to crossbreed several native species to be hardier and better diggers. When he finally gets it right it’s all over for you bitches (“you bitches” being mass starvation of subsistence farmers).
say what u want about the manscaped ads I know they are shit, all of them but the “evil, sinister, malcontent, balls” one puts me into fucking hysterics actually
wordle and bts may seem like they have nothing in common but both have been cited by redditors as the reason why their elderly relative quit watching fox news and started acting normal again
love wins i think
you can hate wordle or bts as much as you like, but in the time honored words of a long gone tumblr user: “shit dude whatever works I guess”
It’s almost like our elderly suffer from extreme loneliness and mental degradation and introducing them to a community based around something positive (music, a fun little game) rather than an endless pit of paranoia and giving them something to stimulate their brain and regrow neurons(you can repair your brain at any age as long as you give it stimulation, like music, or puzzles) will help them recover from what can only be described as a soul sucking addiction
me most of the time: i don’t think my last fic needed such extensive cws at the start of each chapter. like calm down, stick to the basics, people are infinitely varied and you can’t warn for everything that might ever bother someone
me when the post new work page is open: and then in the fourteenth paragraph there’s a mention of blood and then eight paragraphs later it’s ambiguously implied that the characters may have theoretically had sex at one point in the past and then
seeing yall pass around that incredibly misleading post about the boeing ceo or whatever. like. no he didnt admit to killing them. he admitted that he knows the company is retaliating. meaning like. firing or denying raises promotions etc. that kind of stuff. he did not admit in front of congress to his company deliberately having anyone killed.
is what happened to the whistleblowers who died suspect? yeah. is this admission still pretty damning? yeah, especially when you’re already under investigation.
is it anything close to what the post makes it out to be? absolutely not.
you guys continue to piss on the poor like its going out of style
cute ways to remind your boyfriend that your birthday is coming up and you would like to spend your special day with him by exploiting your local watering hole’s insane “get your age in free [food item] on your birthday” promotion:
occasional reminder that i own a cricut that i use almost exclusively for evil
we are going to be fashionable for my birthday celebration
>i sit on a throne and people come up to me one by one displaying different items
>with each item i yell out “yonic” or “phallic” and then wave them away to a door to the left or right of me (depending on whether its yonic or phallic)
>guy comes up with an item thats too difficult to label as yonic or phalic
>i pull a lever to the right of me that opens a trap door under his feet sending him to fall miles down to his death as we are in my floating cloud castle
me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit
mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters
me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU
