I’ve learned so much about computers recently, like how to get them to run smoothly you NEED to give them headpats. So many headpats because they deserve them. Give the computer headpats. Please please please please pl
Sure, she may look all cutesy and innocent and harmless… but that is all a facade. An act. Behind those eyes hides a cruel, violent, unhinged maniac. You don’t know what she’s capable of. And trust me when I say that you don’t want to know….
they’re both the same, so obviously, make out sloppily
They’re both only letters, but that won’t stop them from making out :3
Teachers have tried this and are amazed when their classes don’t go feral like in the book. It’s almost as if the book was supposed to be satire and not a treaty on the nature of humanity.
there’s a timeskip
THERE’S A TIMESKIP
THERE’S A TIMESKIP
THERE’S A TIMESKIP
after losing control of the signal fire there’s a FUCKING TIMESKIP and when the next chapter starts everyone’s hair is several inches longer and their clothes have rotted to shreds and they’re still just kind of chilling!!!!
IT TAKES THE TERRIBLE IMPERIALISM MIND-POISONED EXCESSIVELY BRITISH BOYS IN THE ACTUAL BOOK SEVERAL MONTHS TO COMMIT A SINGLE ACT OF INTENTIONAL VIOLENCE, EVEN THE ONE (1) CHILD WRITTEN AS AN ACTUAL SOCIOPATH
AND then when they DO turn on each other it is because
THERE’S AN UNSPECIFIED WORLD WAR HAPPENING
AND A PILOT’S CORPSE CRASH LANDS ON THE ISLAND POST-DOGFIGHT AND THE CHILDREN MISTAKE THE PARACHUTE FOR A MONSTER AND SPIRAL INTO PARANOIA
BECAUSE CHILDREN INHERIT THE LEGACY AND TRAUMA OF VIOLENCE FROM THE ADULTS WAGING WAR AROUND THEM
HURR DURR IN THE REAL WORLD IT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN LIKE IN LORD OF THE FLIES -
IT DIDN’T HAPPEN THAT WAY IN LORD OF THE FLIES EITHER YOU JUST HAVEN’T READ IT SINCE HIGH SCHOOL IF EVER AND DON’T REMEMBER WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED IN THE GODDAMN BOOK
yes. yes he did. i’m also gonna direct you to the real life ‘lord of the flies’ which occured in the 1960s, when six tongan schoolboys got stranded on a desert island for over a year before being rescued by an australian fisherman (who, it should be noted, later took on all six as crewmembers because the reason they were out in the first place was because they wanted to see the world, and named his ship the Ata after the island they were stranded on). nobody died. the only injuries that occurred were accidental, and when one of the boys broke his leg falling down a cliff, the others braced it and looked after him so well that it healed perfectly. if they argued, then they would literally go to opposite sides of the island until they’d cooled off. after leaving the island, they remained friends for the rest of their lives. here’s a photo of them as adults, with their rescuer (who is third from the left) and other members of his crew.
i read about this in rutger bregman’s human kind, a book i cannot recommend highly enough, but if you don’t want to go and read a whole book about the inherent goodness of humanity (which again, you really should) then the relevant excerpt can be found here.
Hey folks, if you want to fight back against the twitterfication of tumblr USE IT LIKE IT’S TUMBLR!!!!!! REBLOG THINGS!!!!!! USE THE TAGS TO SCREAM AT YOUR FRIENDS!!!!!!!
Woke up to this having more reblogs than likes! Keep it going! Do it on every post! REBLOG THINGS ON THE REBLOGGING THINGS SITE!
this whole mutual thing is overhyped on this site. want to send me an ask off anon? do it. want to tag me in a post? do it. follower, mutual, or just random person who stumbled across my blog: I crave interaction and literally do not mind.
my new modern art piece called “idiot dies”. i trapped i guy in one way mirror glass box and we are gonna watch him die. and then while everyone is watching on like day four i just fill the room with acid killing everyone except the guy, and then i give him forty bucks.
you’re not gonna get kiwifruit mixed up with a kiwi bird or kiwi human … because one is a fruit and one is a bird and one is a human.
Kiwi birds!!! The pride and joy of this awesome country.
To preface, I’ve seen kiwi birds twice. Both times were in bird sanctuaries. They are nocturnal animals so you’d usually have to wait until nightfall to see them. The best experience I had seeing kiwi birds was on this island near where my grandparents live, called Kapiti Island. It’s basically a massive free-roaming bird sanctuary with a bunch of bush walks and hills to climb, because as it’s an island they can monitor the (lack of) predators, such as stoats and cats.
So if you want to see one, go to a bird sanctuary! You could go to a zoo-type one, or for the real deal, an island sanctuary like Kapiti Island is an amazing experience. Though I would not recommend trying to grab one as a pet. Firstly, they’re very skittish, so you probably wouldn’t succeed. Secondly, I have a feeling it might be illegal.
Finally, I’m gonna second @true-blue-straya in that I REALLY hope you’re not mixing up kiwi birds and kiwi fruits. Or kiwi people.
What are you going to say next that eating kiwi people is illegal or something?
Please share resources and don’t keep silent about Palestine. Dedicate your day for them today. Do not ignore them, do not let their voices go unheard.
you’re not gonna get kiwifruit mixed up with a kiwi bird or kiwi human … because one is a fruit and one is a bird and one is a human.
Kiwi birds!!! The pride and joy of this awesome country.
To preface, I’ve seen kiwi birds twice. Both times were in bird sanctuaries. They are nocturnal animals so you’d usually have to wait until nightfall to see them. The best experience I had seeing kiwi birds was on this island near where my grandparents live, called Kapiti Island. It’s basically a massive free-roaming bird sanctuary with a bunch of bush walks and hills to climb, because as it’s an island they can monitor the (lack of) predators, such as stoats and cats.
So if you want to see one, go to a bird sanctuary! You could go to a zoo-type one, or for the real deal, an island sanctuary like Kapiti Island is an amazing experience. Though I would not recommend trying to grab one as a pet. Firstly, they’re very skittish, so you probably wouldn’t succeed. Secondly, I have a feeling it might be illegal.
Finally, I’m gonna second @true-blue-straya in that I REALLY hope you’re not mixing up kiwi birds and kiwi fruits. Or kiwi people.
What are you going to say next that eating kiwi people is illegal or something?
all these retro style games that are like “NO tutorials NO handholding” apparently forgot about the little books that used to come with your game that detailed all the mechanics, controls, special moves, lore, maps, collectables, means of unlocking additional content, character bios, etc
i remember there were a few games that would even include what was essentially a walkthrough/strategy guide for the first level or two, i dont get what these retro devs are on lmao
hadnt actually considered that. much to think about
there is, in fact, a “platonic explanation for this” if you’re not a coward
its so fun to see the diversity of tags on this ranging from “they’re literally just standing next to each other” to “deep bonds dont have to be romantic/sexual!” to “yeah friends can fuck nasty, platonically. coward.” we’re all so correct, there are, in fact, a million platonic explanations for this
self-flagellation and self-bullying are all bad motivators for change BTW. it can be hard to escape from a spiral but genuinely u have to be nice to urself or nothing will change
you have to take care of yourself and not punch yourself down because you feel like you ‘deserve it’. if you feel like the world is against you, you should at least be on your own side while you work through things.
what the fuck is going on this year. january through june didnt happen. july is a distant memory. august and september were the longest months of my life. october ended in 5 seconds. why is november here already this isn’t right
It’s the season erosion from the climate crisis, combined with a hyperindividualistic and stress-bound society. It warps your sense of time.
it has been like at least eight years and sometimes I still think to myself, when I am tired, “but I am le tired… well then take a nap! AND THEN FIRE ZE MISSILES” even though in retrospect that is like one of the most embarrassingly unfunny videos to ever come out of the internet
tbh i still start sentences with “hokay, so” at least 3 times a day
same, aggressively so. I also still use “wtf, mate.”
who doesn’t think this is STILL AS HILARIOUS as it was when we all watched it over and over and over again 15 years ago?
I’ve reblogged this before and will doubtless reblog this again because MY ENTIRE GROUP OF FRIENDS WAS SO OBSESSED WITH THIS VIDEO IN 2002/2003 THAT WE COLLECTIVELY BANNED ANY MENTION OF IT EVER AGAIN
AND YET
WE ARE NOW GROWN-ASS ADULTS IN OUR THIRTIES
AND IT STILL GETS QUOTED FROM TIME TO TIME
I HAVE THE WHOLE THING MEMORISED
TO THIS DAY, MY MOTHER REGULARLY SAYS “BUT I AM LE TIRED” BECAUSE OF A VIDEO I SHOWED HER IN FUCKING HIGH SCHOOL
THIS IS AN ICONIC PIECE OF INTERNET HISTORY AND I WILL FIGHT ANYONE WHO SAYS OTHERS
my wife and I still regularly say “hokay so”, “but I am le tired” and “and some big meteor’s like ‘well fuck that’.” Fucking iconic.
I HAVE NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE AND I’M SO GRATEFUL FOR THIS POST BECAUSE I’VE SEEN IT NOW AND I CAN’T STOP FUCKING LAUGHING
God how has it been that long
Happy Anniversary to this twenty year old flash epic!
One moment from Adventure time that stuck with me big-time when I was a kid was the episode where the Lich first showed up, because in the climax Finn is pursuing him and he chases him down into what are clearly the ruins of a contemporary subway station. And that blew my little mind, because up till that point I’d been parsing it as one of those impossible gonzo mishmash anything-goes constructed worlds, and then abruptly without fanfare here’s strong evidence that there’s some kinda throughline between the world you recognize and the inexplicable fantasy setting on screen. Here’s some strong recontextualization of what Finn the human means, in the singular like that, now that we’ve got a subway recognizably built by modern humans. I mean this was my statue-of-liberty-on-a-beach moment, except it wasn’t even the salient twist of the episode- it was just there, a background setpiece which didn’t have especial attention called to it beyond being where the bad guy of that week’s episode had been chased off to. Love shit like that, clear but understated signifiers that you’re actually been looking at a post-apocalypse this whole time.
there used to be a time where if you asked an american for “a blowie” they wouldn’t give a fuck because they found your australian accent so irresistable. but now they have to question fucking everything. “why is a blowjob called a blowie”. “why is a picture of yourself called a selfie”. “why is a barbecue called a barbie” like these arent the most dumb fucking questions imaginable. VAMOOSE
the thing is you are going to get older and you are going to die. you don’t have unlimited time on earth. you have to spend all your time on your phone now
The amount of safety features incorporated into modern cars is unreal. I’ve seen crashes where the car flipped over and the occupant only had minor injuries. My dad was t-boned by someone speeding off the highway and walked away with a broken arm. The car was completely smashed except for the passenger compartment, which was curtained on all sides with airbags. That one manufacturer has decided they are exempt from implementing all these advancements disgusting and terrifying
When I was going through driver’s ed I was taught that the steering column would stab through your chest if you crashed head on and that was just the way it was. We do not want to go back, not even a little
In 2020 I was rear ended by someone going 40 mph when I was at a dead stop (person in front of us stopped on a blind hill and I had to slam the breaks).
My (then) 3 year old car was barely dented. Me and my spouse walked off without even a HINT of injury. Not even sore muscles.
The person who hit us and had a 2004ish model? Their car was TOTALED (like it had gone from a borzoi to a pug) but everyone inside was also completely safe and okay.
The lack of safety features on the Cybertruck and in Teslas in general is so scary.
what worries me is people saying stuff like ‘let the market decide’ because this is late stage capitalism, where production is totally decoupled from demand. consumers do not have choices anymore, we can’t make decisions.
instead of responding to this as consumers who have made smarter choices than the victims of the CEO of a company that’s simply decided not to comply with health and safety regulations, we need to look at this as citizens who expect their society to protect us. it should not be legal for a car company to make cars that are deadly to drive in, or around. if it is legal, we should change that. if it’s illegal, we should enforce that. like, if one company can flout safety and accountability practices to make an absolute fuckton of money, they’re all going to try.
so like yeah haha look at the jackasses who wanted to noodle around in a ridiculous status symbol. what a bunch of arrogant twerps! but the con men who sold them a death trap have blood on their hands and need to be stopped immediately.
If people can’t understand that this isn’t just about individual choices:
You don’t get to choose what kind of car your parents drive, you fucking cabbages. You don’t get to choose what kind of car crashes into you. You don’t get to choose what kind of car hits you while you’re crossing the road.
This is about everybody being safe on the roads, not just the people driving the fucking Teslas.
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