Me, after forgetting to cut the top off an onion before dicing it: “Aw dammit”
The Gordon Ramsey that lives in my head: “Don’t worry there, this mistake isn’t going to ruin anything. No need to be too hard on yourself”
Me: “Wow, that’s…not what I was expecting”
Gordon: “Of course, you ought to know by now that I don’t shout at cooks just to do so. I do it because the people in hit television show Kitchen Nightmares are putting their services out into the public and claim to be good enough to have the title of head chef. You’re just some guy in your twenties making beef stroganoff for yourself and your roommate. I’m kind of a dick, yeah, but I’m not gonna scream at you for a minor mistake like this”
I really can’t believe I’ve been on this hell site for 8 years
Impart me in your wisdom of ancient times
one time there was a tumblr user with the url “pizza” and she would just comment on any text post about pizza saying “omg that’s me” and then we found out she had an entire tag dedicated to saying the n word
One time somebody paid $750 for the url ‘hi’ and got deleted in less than a year for promoting weight loss scams
There’s always been something deeply wrong with this place.
All this place needs is another scandal. Any volunteers?
oh me? nothing much. just at my job patrolling the same linear path through a warehouse as always. yeah i can hear someone creeping around and as soon as they step into my line of sight they are dead as fuck. but not until then. cant be too hasty with these things
accidentally steps into your vision cone, but quickly backs into the shadows again
what was that? probably nothing. oh well back to my linear path
I’ve seen my partner go through 3 different jobs that all found various ways to fire them or pressure them to quit because the “accommodations” given helped nobody but the company.
When you give companies the power to terminate employment at their own discretion, they will use it at every opportunity they can, especially towards people who are deemed “difficult” (i.e., disabled).
They will always find a way around discrimination laws.
the Star Wars universe is great because you read enough you eventually find out things like the fact that the Stormtrooper whose armor Luke stole in Episode IV was gay and in an affair with fucking Grand Moff Tarkin, which is a completely canonical fact that I am not making up.
The next time you watch a New Hope, keep in mind Luke is wearing the armor of a man who knew Tarkin sexually. The armor Luke is wearing when he says the iconic line “I’m Luke Skywalker, I’m here to rescue you” has more than likely been on the floor of Tarkin’s bedroom.
since I’m getting naysayers about this again!
The actual officer whom the trooper is in a relationship goes unspecified within the book, and isn’t listed as Tarkin specifically
However.
The officer is described as; wearing a grey suit, continuously bragging about the strength of the Death Star, and having the highest level of clearance aboard the Death Star, which is how he is able to send secret messages to TK-421
At one point the officer says he won’t be interrogating Princess Leia because Darth Vader will be doing it, meaning he’s definitely high enough in the chain of command to know that about Vader
At one point the officer jokes he just gave an “explosive” demonstration. The story takes place right around the time Alderaan is blown up.
According to someone on Reddit, the Audible version of the story uses Tarkin’s voice for the officer in question
It’s Tarkin.
I have this book and the Audible version and can confirm that nearly every word of this is true (note: the voice is, like, obviously not Peter Cushing, but it’s… pretty clearly Tarkin) except! There is one note here that is ABSOLUTELY incorrect.
That armor has never been on the floor of Tarkin’s bedroom. He is very proud of his carpet and the armor goes on the chair by his bed.
Note: the country hick accent thing is because this is their first in-person meeting and TK-421 thinks Tarkin will be into that.
petition to tell biden and harris to comply with the icj’s ruling and provisional measures here if you’re a us citizen. so far they’ve sent 47,074 letters out of the goal of 51,200!
imagine if doorways grew back like scabbed over with fresh drywall and you had to keep carving them back out with a jabsaw to keep the doorway clear etc
Imagine if the membranes recoiled in pain every time you did this. Imagine if over time, some doorways became accustomed sensation. Imagine that very rarely, some even seemed to enjoy it.
*sleepover host voice* imagine if you two went to sleep
Oh for gods sake kids it’s like piercing an ear - that’s why you put a doorframe in - you don’t hang a door in drywall, you gremlins. You frame the door. It’s like those gauges that people put in their ears - the hole stays. It won’t scab over with a doorframe in it. You’ve lived around doors you whole life, you little clowns. Lights out
i hate hate hate hate hate hate hate when a monster is loved and that love turns them human I HATE IT I HATE IT SO MUCH. tell that thing that goes bump in the night that you love the way its fangs glimmer in the moonlight and the way its horrible gnarled claws are so gentle with you or GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!
“oh I’m too old for stuffed animals” skill issue. sorry you can’t appreciate little creatures made to hang out with you, I on the other hand am full of joyous whimsy and therefore vastly superior.
[Id: A fully rendered digital drawing of Merle Highchurch from The Adventure Zone.
He is a fat, Black dwarf man with long, wavy gray hair and a full beard. He has a nicked ear and a small scar on his shoulder as well as otter-like whiskers and a protruding fang.
He is sitting in an office chair, his elbows resting on a table. He is glaring at an off-screen character (John), pointing down at the table as if to emphasize a point. A text queue underneath him says: “- You can apologize to me and tell me you were wrong”. End description.]
babe wake up! new booktok nsfw censorship term just dropped
what if I couldn’t take it anymore?
Reminder to just say masturbation, sex, vagina, penis, menstruation, fuck, death, kill, boobs, dyke, faggot, etc. like a real adult.
reminder to everyone who doesnt use tiktok: you dont actually get banned for saying these words, people do this to evade others’ tag blockers.
a lot of users DONT want to see this kind of post, so people censor and change words around to get put on peoples “for you” page even if they have been marked as “not interested”. this is part of why it can get really difficult to find posts you actually like on tiktok, is because the algorithm is really bad at guessing that these posts are not actually about “self care”. the creators of these posts are hoping they get forced in front of people who want to see something else.
Oh that’s way worse than what I’d been led to believe was happening
Well well well, if it isn’t my old nemesis? Tch, why am I not surprised? I should’ve known known it’d all come back to you, Drawing a Character’s Fingers.
I make bad pebbles posts part 2 electric boogaloo cuz you guys liked the last one (why, what is wrong with you people *gives you all a platonic smooch*)
thinking very normally about the fucking Pronoun Hierarchy lore drop from the dev stream. about how the councillors activelystopreferringto gabriel with he/him during the act I intermission, degrading him, seeing him as lesser and not deserving of something of such closeness to god – and yet the narrative as a whole still continues to use he/him for gabe regardless, even though from a story perspective, that has been taken away from him by the beginning of act II. even after he loses his light and *should* lose that identity alongside it, he doesn’t. regardless of what the world thinks of him, he’s still him. man. you could bury a sliver of a transgender allegory 10 feet in the ground and brother i’d claw for it through the dirt like a truffle hog
the Star Wars universe is great because you read enough you eventually find out things like the fact that the Stormtrooper whose armor Luke stole in Episode IV was gay and in an affair with fucking Grand Moff Tarkin, which is a completely canonical fact that I am not making up.
The next time you watch a New Hope, keep in mind Luke is wearing the armor of a man who knew Tarkin sexually. The armor Luke is wearing when he says the iconic line “I’m Luke Skywalker, I’m here to rescue you” has more than likely been on the floor of Tarkin’s bedroom.
since I’m getting naysayers about this again!
The actual officer whom the trooper is in a relationship goes unspecified within the book, and isn’t listed as Tarkin specifically
However.
The officer is described as; wearing a grey suit, continuously bragging about the strength of the Death Star, and having the highest level of clearance aboard the Death Star, which is how he is able to send secret messages to TK-421
At one point the officer says he won’t be interrogating Princess Leia because Darth Vader will be doing it, meaning he’s definitely high enough in the chain of command to know that about Vader
At one point the officer jokes he just gave an “explosive” demonstration. The story takes place right around the time Alderaan is blown up.
According to someone on Reddit, the Audible version of the story uses Tarkin’s voice for the officer in question
It’s Tarkin.
I have this book and the Audible version and can confirm that nearly every word of this is true (note: the voice is, like, obviously not Peter Cushing, but it’s… pretty clearly Tarkin) except! There is one note here that is ABSOLUTELY incorrect.
That armor has never been on the floor of Tarkin’s bedroom. He is very proud of his carpet and the armor goes on the chair by his bed.
Note: the country hick accent thing is because this is their first in-person meeting and TK-421 thinks Tarkin will be into that.
the Star Wars universe is great because you read enough you eventually find out things like the fact that the Stormtrooper whose armor Luke stole in Episode IV was gay and in an affair with fucking Grand Moff Tarkin, which is a completely canonical fact that I am not making up.
The next time you watch a New Hope, keep in mind Luke is wearing the armor of a man who knew Tarkin sexually. The armor Luke is wearing when he says the iconic line “I’m Luke Skywalker, I’m here to rescue you” has more than likely been on the floor of Tarkin’s bedroom.
since I’m getting naysayers about this again!
The actual officer whom the trooper is in a relationship goes unspecified within the book, and isn’t listed as Tarkin specifically
However.
The officer is described as; wearing a grey suit, continuously bragging about the strength of the Death Star, and having the highest level of clearance aboard the Death Star, which is how he is able to send secret messages to TK-421
At one point the officer says he won’t be interrogating Princess Leia because Darth Vader will be doing it, meaning he’s definitely high enough in the chain of command to know that about Vader
At one point the officer jokes he just gave an “explosive” demonstration. The story takes place right around the time Alderaan is blown up.
According to someone on Reddit, the Audible version of the story uses Tarkin’s voice for the officer in question
It’s Tarkin.
I have this book and the Audible version and can confirm that nearly every word of this is true (note: the voice is, like, obviously not Peter Cushing, but it’s… pretty clearly Tarkin) except! There is one note here that is ABSOLUTELY incorrect.
That armor has never been on the floor of Tarkin’s bedroom. He is very proud of his carpet and the armor goes on the chair by his bed.
Note: the country hick accent thing is because this is their first in-person meeting and TK-421 thinks Tarkin will be into that.
“No one wants to look at art of OCs” I don’t think that’s true at all…I follow people specifically to see their OCs literally all the time. Bring back being curious about people’s OCs, asking questions about them and hyping them up like we did when we were teens
