not to enforce gender roles but a computer should NOT fucking have apps okay. if I wanted an app I’d go on my phone my laptop is for Programs. I mean this.
This is the most reflection I’ve ever seen anyone do on Twitter.
You gotta understand once when I was on Twitter argument and realized I was wrong and I went to say something like ‘you’re totally right, my bad, thanks for helping me realize this’ and I got the “Twitter Users Don’t Usually Post This”
When you write stuff more on the surrealist/magical realism side of things the question of “what drugs were you on when you wrote this” gets really tiresome. I was standing in line at the grocery store when I was like “maybe I should write a story about an infinitely expanding parking lot” and then I did it while eating a cheese sandwich and listening to cool Zelda music and rain noises to study to
The only drugs involved here was Kraft American cheese slices
But seriously though you can’t interact with everything you read like it needs to make logical sense in a real world way. And that sentiment is extremely English-speaking-world anyways. If you read Jorge Luis Borges, even in translation, you kind of just have to accept what he’s giving you. You see what he’s doing. He’s messing with concepts. Let a writer just take you somewhere nonsensical sometimes so you can focus on what they’re actually pointing at. It’s enjoyable. It’s weird. It’s wacky. It is what it is. And if you’re looking for real world logic in a surrealist story or play or movie you’re gonna walk right by all the good parts.
no but you know what would be nice? experiencing the kind of happiness that doesn’t turn out to be a lesson that I have to mourn over for at least 3 months
feeling stupid as hell because I somehow only just now realized that the companion cube is to chel what chel is to glados. like as far as being an object, a research tool, something towards which an emotional attachment is ridiculous but also inevitable. something that you know you’ll have to throw in the incinerator later and which never says a word to you, and yet you can’t help yourself from falling in a strange kind of love. damn this game gay
normally id put this in tags but fucking. the bit in portal 2 about the companion cube. where she taunts you with it again. a return of something that might have affection or compassion for you, but you cant be sure. a surprise reunion.
she taunts you with companion cubes that are out of reach but keep getting destroyed by her. upset about how close you were to finding that connection again. she even talks about how maybe one couldve talked. but we’ll never know now because it’s gone. and the fact that she gives you the ORIGINAL beat-up companion cube, still just fine (if burnt), when you finally leave the facility for good at the end.
one of my favourite things about my boyfriend is that he’s 6'4 but convinced he is a normal sized person and this does not constitute “tall”
once, if not twice, a week the card game shop he plays digimon at upload a top-4 photo best described as “gandalf and the hobbits” and every time he is genuinely baffled as to why he looks like that
told him i made this post and he’s still insistent that he isn’t tall
bf: i’m not tall! i feel like everyone i see is around the same height as me. like people in the street
me: they aren’t
bf: but i can see their faces! if i’m looking at their faces they must be the same height
me: you’re looking down slightly babe
bf: why would i do that
me: because you’re tall
incidentally the fact i am 5'5 also comes as a shock to him at least once a day and then he inevitably asks if i’m “normally that short”
if you lean in real close you can hear his singular brain cell bouncing around like a windows screensaver
Has your boyfriend got his eyesight checked? Bc when I don’t wear my glasses I’m nice and close to the ground but when I do it’s HOLY SHIT WHY AM I THIS TALL, I’M AFRAID OF HEIGHTS, HELP ME time and it’s genuinelly terrifying.
he wears glasses he’s just dumb
update to this post from yesterday:
bf: apparently only 7% of people are over 6’ tall me: yes……..? bf: that isn’t very many. am i tall? me: i cannot believe we are having this discussion again. yes. you are tall. you are still tall. you were tall yesterday. you will be tall tomorrow bf: oh my god i’m tall aren’t i me: my love the netherlands is the tallest country in the world and even there average male height is 6’ 0.5". you are tall by “kingdom of giants” standards, even. but we live on “shortarse island”, so… bf: AM i tall though me: you are 6ft 4
he is he’s very pretty
Can he make spinach puffs? Asking for irrelevant reasons….
having watched emperors new groove (it’s my favourite) he does understand this reference but also he really loves cooking so you saying this has now prompted him to look up how to make spinach puffs
which is to say that yes, he is kronk
fun fact they’re both the same person. same 6'4 boyfriend referred to himself as a short king because he thought it meant a man who really likes wearing shorts
This reminds me of this guy who used to live on my dad’s street.
Every time it snowed, the snow plow would take out his mailbox - and only his mail box. And just to be clear - it was done intentionally. No one knows why, but the driver of the snow plow would target his box and mow it down. He’d call the DOT to complain, and would get an earful of excuses that amounted to “not our fault you have a wimpy mailbox.”
Fast forward to the next winter. First decent snow starts falling, and every kid is hoping for a snow day. It was right around 4:30 am that the whole neighborhood was woken up to this loud CLANG and the screech of tearing metal. My dad made it to the window first and started laughing his ass off.
Sitting out side was one very totaled, and almost ripped in half, snow plow. And these weren’t little pick-up trucks with a blade on the front, we have these up in NY:
Well, turns out over the summer, my dad’s neighbor got himself a backhoe and sank a steel I beam into the ground in his front yard. Then he covered it with a decorative wood sleeve and topped it with a brand new mailbox. When the snowplow driver tried to mow it down it was a bad case of immovable object meets unstoppable force - and the mailbox won. With the plow firmly impaled on the I beam, it was very clear that the driver had gone out of his way to hit it.
Naturally, the DOT wasn’t happy, and the neighbor’s reply was simple: “Not my faulty you have a wimpy snowplow.” They did try to sue him for the damages, but as he had gone to the town, gotten approval for the post and its installation, and made sure everything was up to code, it was thrown out pretty quick.
And for anyone wondering about the driver… He was fine. His job and tighty-whiteys … not so much.
so funny how people on this website are like “how is celibacy sweeping in this poll you guys are all virgin losers. casual sex is awesome you should fuck your friends” until the person having casual sex and fucking their friends is aro. then they start pissing and shitting themselves.
They’re all big into acephobia and compulsory sexuality until they realise it would accidentally affirm alloaros, then it’s bad.
It’s like when transphobes tell trans women “No matter what you do you’ll always be a man, I’m not calling you anything other than that” and then when a cis man likes pink suddenly they’re calling him a girl. Bigotry is not consistent
Yep, aroace person here and I’ve seen both of these expressed sometimes even by the same person. As you said, it’s not about having a consistent take on the matter. People will simply shift the argument to fit the target. In this case, the goal is to make the environment ultimately hostile to both aro and ace people.
You can almost hear “Okay, enough of this!” happening.
if you watch too she decides to start breaking it right after she hit the top one on her last jump. like oh? you touch me?? well now i touch you!! *BITE BITE KILL KILL*
I’m crying. Here’s a photo of a sailor from the Götheborg watching over the little sailboat in tow:
From the story:
We repeatedly emphasized that we were aboard a small 8-meter sailboat, but the response was the same each time: “We are a 50-meter three-masted sailboat, and we offer our assistance in towing you to Paimpol.” We were perplexed by the size difference between our two boats, as we feared being towed by a boat that was too large and at too fast a speed that could damage our boat.
The arrival of the Götheborg on the scene was rapid and surprising, as we did not expect to see a merchant ship from the East India Company of the XVIII century. This moment was very strange, and we wondered if we were dreaming. Where were we? What time period was it? The Götheborg approached very close to us to throw the line and pass a large rope. The mooring went well, and our destinies were linked for very long hours, during which we shared the same radio frequency to communicate with each other.
The crew of the Götheborg showed great professionalism and kindness towards us. They adapted their speed to the size of our boat and the weather conditions. We felt accompanied by very professional sailors. Every hour, the officer on duty of the Götheborg called us to ensure everything was going well.[…]
This adventure, very real, was an incredible experience for us. We were extremely lucky to cross paths with the Götheborg by chance and especially to meet such a caring crew.
Dear commander and crew of the Götheborg, your kindness, and generosity have shown that your ship is much more than just a boat. It embodies the noblest values of the sea, and we are honored to have had the chance to cross your path and benefit from your help.
“Our destinies were linked for very long hours” is just knocking me out.
i don’t care if Cyberpunk 2077 was patched and made good. I genuinely think it’s shameful that a video game could come out that broken and win an award years later. it’s like if Morbius won an Oscar because the DVD release was good.
There’s another thing that bugs me about this, all of those “made it good” updates are so massive? There was one that was 43GB - more than half the installation size of the game. That’s fucked up.
Not everyone has an internet connection that makes this a breeze. And even if they do? This should not be a thing. I should be able to buy a game that has been in development for a decade, made by an acclaimed studio, on release day, and not worry about constantly installing dozens of gigabytes worth of patches to make the game playable. Often it’s not even optional. I do not have the choice to say “my internet sucks, I’m okay with the current state of the game, I don’t want to install this update right now”. Depending on the platform, you are being forced to sit through potentially hours of downloads, or else you can’t play the game you bought without jumping through hoops, because it will not let you.
This shouldn’t be happening. They’re selling unfinished garbage based on the vague idea that “they can always patch it later”. No. Fuck your patches and updates and “”“fixes”“” that are just you doing the basic quality control that should have happened before launch. Games cost upwards of 100€ nowadays just to get a somewhat complete base version, because of course they cut them up to sell in seventeen different editions. Make sure your expensive toys WORK, or stop charging people money to be your QA department. If you want to release an early access version so players can help you fix the game? Make it free. If you want money? Make it work. There is no eating your cake and having it, too, here.
You accidentally cross a witch, and she curses you, saying “You can only speak lies”. Unfortunately, this makes it so you can only say the word “lies”, and the witch admits she’s an apprentice that screwed up the spell. Now you’ve teamed up with her to figure out how to undo it.
chekov’s cat: if you see a cat, it will probably be relevant later.
schroedinger’s gun: there’s no way to know if a gun is loaded or not until you physically inspect and check it yourself, so it’s safest to assume all guns are loaded.
Schrœdinkov’s Catgun: If you see a cat with a gun, there’s no way to know if it will be relevant later except to wait and observe.
Placcam’s Razorcave: The simplest explanation for anything is that you have no understanding of the real world.
Murphagoryan Lawrem: The square of the consequences of any two things that can go wrong will equal the sum of the squared consequences of the individual things.
Okkov’s Gunblade: If you see someone with a bayonet, the simplest explanation is that they will stab you in the future.
Schrœdingorean Catrollary: If you put a cat in a triangular box, the hypotenuse face of the box could be both intact and destroyed until you actually look at what the cat’s been up to.
Plurphy’s Cave Law: If you don’t understand the real world, things will go wrong.
Pychœccovamatophy’s theory of cat-shaving cave gun regulations: If you see a cat with a gun in one hand and a blade in the other emerging from a cave on a right-angled path, the simplest solution is to flee along the hypotenuse, but you won’t know until later whether anything will go wrong because you really don’t understand the real world.
Hello everyone i know you already did a lot to me and to my family I’m shy asking your help and your support but this family really need your support ( i know them in person) Mohamed is a hemophilia patient who needs access to medicine and to do surgery on his knees, his 11-year-old daughter also needs thigh surgery (she was supposed to do it outside Gaza in November but couldn’t travel due to the border issues). I appreciate you guys and love you. Share it as u can.
Tired of your baby girl being seen as a genderless imp? Afraid strangers might not recognize your sexless proto-human as the soft femme heartbreaker she is? Well now you can glue some shit on her head! That’s right, just glue some gender conformity right onto her unclosed fontanelle! Say goodbye to awkwardly explaining that no, despite her bald head, your androgynous poop machine is actually a demure coquette! Glue your fucking baby today!
I finished portal and immediately went to ebay and ordered portal 2, I cannot wait to hang out with that wretched stephen merchant ball that people were obsessed with 10 years ago
I’ve been playing for about half an hour and I’ve come to the conclusion that I would die for this little sphere guy
Full offense, but I think milk substitution charges should not exist at coffee shops. It is NOT my or anyone’s fault that they cannot have dairy and that’s that.
non-weebs be like, “i don’t like all the boobs and ass in anime,” but then weebs be like, “okay but like which anime did you watch?” and non-weebs be like, “i can’t believe Big Titty Cherry Blossom Swimsuit Club had so many titties!”
non-weebs be like “oh I enjoyed this Ghibli movie, maybe anime is okay”, but then weebs be like “hey you should watch Big Titty Cherry Blossom Swimsuit Club next, it’s great!” and non-weebs be like “anime is not okay”
this one’s a few days late due to having a lot of doctors appointments sorry it’s just 9 pages, and about some rats… it’s more symbolic than anything really
(it’s completely unrelated to any of my songs that have to do with “puzzleboy”)
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