Fuck I’m at a fencing tournament and literally a minute after I reblogged this my dad told me that he talked to the point people and I’m probably going to win a medal.
BURN BAGEL BURN
OH WHY NOT?
I need to follow up to say I reblogged this last night, and this morning I got some of the best news of my life, like, a life dream come true news thing.
Bagel what are your powers
FUCK, I though it was just another lucky meme but LISTEN. Since a week ago I was waiting a phone call to confirm me if I got a job or not in my university. I reblogged this yesterday’s night “just for fun and because I don’t want any bagel to be mad with me”, and today’s afternoon, while I was losing my time as always, the professor I was supposed to work with called me and asked me for my personal information to start working with her.
THE BAGEL POWERS ARE WAY TOO MUCH FOR THIS WORLD
I GOT A JOB THE DAY AFTER MY QUEUE POSTED THIS THE FIRST TIME AND I JUST REALIZED IT WHEN I SAW IT AGAIN HOLY GOD
The bagel hasn’t let me down yet!
I got a job offer after reblogging the bagel. Believe in the bagel!
🙏🏼
Worth a try lol
i could use some good news or even a good girl
Go lil bagle! Show me your power!
Okii then!
THIS IS THE FIRST THING ON MY BLOG
I GOT ASKED OUT FOR THE FIRST TIME AFTER I REBLOGGED IT
wait but whats happening with the bagel tho
It’s burning, as is everything I’ve hoped for whenever I’ve reblogged a post like this
I just kinda wanna watch something burn?
Mood
You guys didn’t listen when I said Bagels hold an ancient and wonderous power.
Bagel time
I need this
do it
I’m at an all time low I need this
ok sure
no loss in trying. so here wo go
😌👀
Its bagel time. I believe in you bagel. 🥯
Ok so.
Last time I reblogged this, I was complaining to my mum how I never got to go on walks alone. Then, she legit said to me, “well why don’t you go down to *censored*?” Which she’d never let me do before. I had three hours. In a place half an hour from home. It works.
I need all the luck i can get
(*-*)
Uhhhh worth a try
I doubt it will work but….
i dont lose anything trying…
BAGEL
again, YES?!
OK SO I DID THIS ON THE MORNING AND GUESS WHAT HAPPENED AT SCHOOL?
TWO TESTS WERECANCELLED!
NO HOMEWORK!!
WE HAD A BREAK OF 30 MINUTES (we normally have a break of 5-10 min)
AND MY CRUSH ASKED ME TO WORK ON A PROJECT WITH HIM!!!
I don’t know how you do it bagel, but you’re awesome!
Bagel time
guys the more you add text to your reblogs the more time it takes to reblog, therefore stealing our good news
Bagel power.
well let’s see if it works
How the power of the reblog Bagel works
REBLOG BAGEL HELP ME
rebagel
Bagel time
Bagel give me a reason to live please
MONEY MONEY MONEY BRING IN THE MONEY AND MEN
bagel pleASE I JUST WANT A TEXT BACK
OKOKOK PLS
PLS???
What’s the harm
Bagel please bring good news.
Bagel pls help 😭
i need it
praying to the bagel gods
I need sumthing good i feel like i got beaten up by shits older brother who goes to the gym at 5am cuts off his eyelids and maces himself without shedding a single tear
tetanus fact: it’s an old wives’ tale that tetanus is caused by rusty metal. it’s actually caused by puncture wounds substantially deeper than they are wide, which introduce ubiquitous anaerobic spores (i.e. the “seeds” of single-celled organisms which cannot grow if exposed to oxygen) into a warm, poorly-oxygenated space in the body. so receiving shallow cuts from a rusty knife is not likely to give you tetanus but puncture wounds from clean but non-sterile objects can. this is great news if you like receiving superficial wounds from rusty knives and blades and swords all over your dumbass body
Stop calling them superficial. All my wounds are passionate and meaningful
thinking about that one wordless calvin and hobbes sunday strip thats just calvins dad ditching his work to go play in the snow… its going to make me cry
Omg this is SUCH a grandma thing. She’s totally okay with them being queer, she’s just upset that she can’t feed them her world-famous ham.
“Honey, you’re so thin! Are you eating enough at home? I really don’t agree with this whole ‘vegetarian’ thing, I’m worried about my grandbaby not getting enough protein!!!”
I don’t care you you fuck what clothes you wear your pronouns or what you so to your hair but WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WON’T EAT MY FOOD
Watch out for any job listings that claim you’ll cruise the seas for American gold, fire no guns, and shed no tears. These are all scams and the job is NOT as advertised. Source: I fell for it and am now a broken man on a Halifax pier
✨ Please reblog the polls to make them reach out to as many people as possible, but try to keep it spoiler-free to make people listen to the music with an open mind 💖 Artists and titles will be revealed after the poll’s conclusion ✨
From @symphony-calamity, for radios: Crackling static, knobs and dials, and abstract sense of connection to humanity and the world, they’re very sexy. / They connect humanity across vast distances! They have buttons and dials and make static noises! They play music! There’s something so incredibly tangible about radios, they obviously deserve to win this tournament.
Minerals and crystals are beautiful! They come in all sorts of different natural colours, shapes and sizes. And each property tells us so much about its compositions, its origins, and the rock it is in. Every property relates to either its atomic structure or the magma it is in.
Minerals, by definition, consists entirely of a group of atoms that repeats itself throughout the structure. Occasionally, you get an atom like iron mixed in. That is how you get minerals such as amethyst or citrine. Even cat’s eye and star effect are related to impurities. And Occasionally, radiation decides to disrupt the atomic structure and creates a false colour in the mineral. This is how you get green diamonds. Sometimes, the defined structure itself causes interference colours like in bubbles, that you get funky colours in labradorite.
While crystals might not heal you physically (they do help crystal lovers like me mentally though!), they certainly need your love and support. We are behind in the poll, so please vote for crystals and minerals!!!!!
Humans have finally managed to land on Mars, only to find a locked safe buried in the Martian soil. The key is apparently on Earth, but no one knows where.
The galactic council watched on to see how humanity would handle the task, much as they had with several species before. What the test was supposed to show was whether or not a species of violent nature could ever be brought to work together. They finally picked something up, another ship already headed to Mars? Was it possible humans were that clever to have found the key, maybe it was more specialists and equipment to analyze the locked crate to ensure it was safe to open. A few minutes after landing, they got another broadcast from the red planet.
“This is the LockPickingLawyer and today I’ve got something quite special, this locked alien chest. First of all I have to thank everyone who recommended me for the job, I’m honored that you all thought of me. Now let’s get to work”
The council representatives were confused as they started analyzing the translation, before even getting through the name he spoke something haunting
“Normally I don’t say things like this but this lock is quite unique, however with no security pins it will still be quite quick.”
“There we go, a click on 3… “
All the species of the galactic council sat dumbfounded, they spent many galactic cycles refining and perfecting their study and in all their time not a singular race had tried this method. Click after click, even in such an intricate lock the human had only spent around five minutes tampering with it.
“There we go, now while I can’t open this as part of my video I can say that I at least have a clue what the key should look like in case it ever gets locked again. I admire the design choices and the fact that at least it was harder to get open than anything Master Lock has made”
- ‘u dont have (insert food/music/restaurant here) over there??’
- ‘wait what time is it. shouldnt u be asleep’
- alternatively: timezoned/clockblocked again
- ‘do u need a hug. have a virtual hug’
- weird slang terms
- ‘i will fight everyone thats mean to u. i will fight them rn’
- vague embarrassment regarding ur accent
- ‘dont maKE ME COME OVER THERE’
- ‘oh yeah i have a friend who lives in (insert country here) and apparently’
- no real hugs :((
- suffering
- fahrenheit vs celsius
- the measuring of things in feet fucks one of u up, probably
AND DONT FORGET
“i made food do you want some”
“yes”
I spent a whole week with my friendship group, two of which are Dutch. The week was just FULL of “Do you have that?” “I have no idea what you’re talking about” “that’s a thing over there?”
Also I learned that both Brits and Dutch say “half 8” (8 used as an example) to describe a time, only we Brits say it to mean “half past eight” while the Dutch mean “half OF eight” so they really mean 7:30???
That lead to many confusions between all os us lol
Found these tags on my last hand-drawn post inspiring:
I’m so good at art.
This doodle made me laugh too much so now this is the Fred this week
THE ONE PIZZA…!
THE ONE PIZZA IS REAL!!!!!!
A scan of the old Friday Fred expansion from the GUYS system. I don’t think this is Friday Fred’s first appearance, but I could be wrong. It’s definitely an off-model design.
Fred is Going Corporate
He can’t stay this small forever…
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬Nu är vi här Fred♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬CaramelDansen♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
We need you to roll up a most radical Friday, Prince.
OK this week I am doing a roundup of the Freds which got lost in the shuffle.
Found these tags on my last hand-drawn post inspiring:
I’m so good at art.
This doodle made me laugh too much so now this is the Fred this week
THE ONE PIZZA…!
THE ONE PIZZA IS REAL!!!!!!
A scan of the old Friday Fred expansion from the GUYS system. I don’t think this is Friday Fred’s first appearance, but I could be wrong. It’s definitely an off-model design.
Fred is Going Corporate
He can’t stay this small forever…
♩ ♪ ♫ ♬Nu är vi här Fred♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ ♩ ♪ ♫ ♬CaramelDansen♩ ♪ ♫ ♬
We need you to roll up a most radical Friday, Prince.
OK this week I am doing a roundup of the Freds which got lost in the shuffle.
this gif is perfectly timed because it gives you enough time to read it, comprehend it, and still have this too-long-for-comfort moment of suspense before being punched square in the solar plexus
which one of u was going to tell me that tea tastes different if u put it in hot water?
y- you were putting it in cold water?????
Radish. Answer the question radish.
yeah??? i thought for like. 5 years that ppl just put it in hot water 2 speed up the tea-ification process didn’t realize there was an actual reason
You dont have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes???
[ID: Tags reading “u think i have the patience to boil water wtf ?????” /End ID]
why are you. putting it in the microwave to boil it
Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove
Its takes less than a minute
Bestie is ur stovetop powered by the fucking sun
How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove
Like seven minutes
Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat n it boils in like two minutes… less than that is u use a saucepan…
Crying you’re putting the whole mug on the stove ???? On medium heat???? Ur stove is enchanted
Every single person in this post is a fucking lunatic
Yet another post that reads like four shakespeare characters who come out in the middle of the play to talk about something completely unrelated for comic relief
(Enter RADISHN’T, MOTHMAN MISATO, BOIMG FROG and CATS'N RAINCOATS, stage left. They are having a HEATED DISCUSSION.)
RADISHN’T: Prithee, which one of you had planned to tell
Of diff'rent flavours gained by simple act
Of brewing tea with water hot, not cold?
MOTHMAN: Egad! you poured the water cold? Wherefore?!
FROG: An answer from you, Radish, I must beg.
RADISHN’T: Indeed I did, dear friends - why does this shock?
Without the guide of others I assumed
That heat was merely added for the sake
Of expediting this solution’s brewing!
Half a decade I have spent, or more,
Not questioning this worldview I had made.
In fact, I am myself a bit surprised
That you might think that I, your dearest friend,
Might have a patience of sufficient stock
To wait until a pot of water boils.
FROG: Three minutes overtaxes patience so?
The microwave will beep when it is done!
CATS'N: My friend, this answer vexes me the more!
Can it be true that thou dost boil by nuke?!
FROG: Are you in turn, my friend, so shocked to know
That I have not the patience, like our Root,
To boil upon the stove our favour’d drink?
CATS'N: It takes less than a minute!
FROG: On what plate?
Perhaps your dinner cooks atop the sun?
CATS'N: How long can take your stove to fill the task
Of boiling but a single cup alone?
FROG: In minutes?
CATS'N: Yes!
FROG: I counted seven, once.
CATS'N: Perhaps you ought to have your timepiece checked!
If on a middle heat you place the cup
You soon will have the scalding drink you crave.
Two minutes, in a mug upon the plate
Or even less, if you should have a pot.
FROG: You cause me tears - is this how thou dost live?
You place upon the iron stove a mug?
A mug, ceramic, filled with water cold?
How do these flames, though medium in height,
Not shatter like a glass this fragile thing?
Surely, then, your kitchen is bewitched
With magicks far beyond the mortal ken!
(The FOUR realise they have wandered into the THRONE ROOM. The ROYAL COURT watches with fascination.)
KING: Ev'ry single person in this group must be a fucking lunatic, it seems.
I’m sorry but the THOUGHT that has been put into this, I actually CAN’T—
The fact that nearly every line is so metrically considered- near perfect iambic pentameter witb the occasional trochee for emphasis, but usually retaining a strong sense of rhythm nonetheless. And then the king comes in at the end, so wound in his disbelief that his response is reduced to prose.
And the even better thing about this is how easy it would have been to structure the king’s line into iambic pentameter: it is effectively already said as such because of the way wizardlyghost has phrased it, yet they haven’t!! They did not break the line, rendering what, by all typically of both Shakespearean canon and other periods context should be the character with the most command and authority in the whole play. If there was ever a more effective way to convey a genuine “what the fuck??”, I know of it not.
But it gets better!! Shakespeare regularly uses meter in order to represent class divide; the nobility usually speak in iambic pentameter, save for a few particularly chosen moments (e.g. Lady Macbeth’s descent into madness, Othello’s realisation of Desdemona’s “betrayal”) or just lines where Shakespeare needs to suggest high emotion or when a character is lost in thought. Supernatural characters like the fairies in A Midsummer Night’s Dream and the Witches in Macbeth usually speak in trochaic tetrameter, an inversion of iambic pentameter. Lower class characters, particularly those used for comic relief (usually under the influence of alcohol), speak with no structure at all: their language is plain prose. Therefore, if this is a conversation between these types of characters, as the prompt from silvergirachi suggests, why the hell are the characters speaking so eloquently???
Now, this is Tumblr. It is subsequently logical to assume that this may have merely been a humorous recreation (and a very good one at that) of the Shakespearean style in a way that is widely recognisable to an audience that may or may not have read a great deal of Shakespeare, which is understandable. However, logic is boring so I’m going to probe further into this to the point where future historians will look to this as an example of overanalysing.
The inherent eloquence of the characters here suggests an unusual subversion of the roles typically assumed in Shakespearean comedy. This could be interpreted along two major avenues: firstly, that the rhetoric displayed by the speakers is fundamentally representative of how truth can be expected even from the most seemingly pointless or ludicrous discussions. Furthermore, it could suggest that it matters not how well constructed your speeches are: if you talk bullshit, it’s going to sound that way despite your attempts to hide it.
This is similar but not identical to the second avenue of interpretation: there is the implication that the noblemen in the play are in fact the comic relief characters, therefore implying that the “common people” of the play are the ones whose influence, though not expressed in such a highly spoken manner, makes a lot more sense than whatever the hell this is. If this was a real Shakespeare play, I would call it a subtle exploration into the innate corruption of the rich and powerful. Well done, op.
Now, I doubt any of this is actually grounded analysis in any way, shape or form, but if someone else can take this to the extremes of writing a Shakespearean scene, why can I not analyse it as such? And where else to do so than Tumblr?
im in tears i didnt think anyone would put this much analysis into this‚ thank you so much
i also like that everyone else gets a version of their handle and then tumblr user pidoop is promoted to king
why does no one in this post own a kettle :’)
That not once is a tea kettle – stovetop or electric – mentioned here stresses me out and also deeply confused me.
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