writing-prompt-s:

You work for the United States Department of Paranormal Phenomena, where you deal with stuff ranging from a harmless talking toaster to world ending eldritch abominations. Today you have been tasked with giving an orientation class to the new recruits.

peanutbutter-and-jellie:

animatedtext:

@slutty-wizard-council

theraconteurasaur:

Perennial October mood.

catboybiologist:

FUCK I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING

aspiring-apparition:

(I bring a sort of “Everyone has inherent worth regardless of their productivity” Vibe to every conversation that ableists don’t really seem to like)

gremlinsbooty:

mollyjimbly:

🚨🚨I MUST ASK ONCE AGAIN FOR THE FUTURE OF A FREE AND EQUAL INTERNET I AM BEGGING YOU TO SIGN THESE PETITIONS, DONATE, SHARE TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW, THIS IS SERIOUSLY THE VERY LAST CHANCE!!!🚨🚨

I do not care how busy you are right now, I implore you to take 15 minutes and sign all of these petitions and spread awareness. Share these links absolutely everywhere, Facebook, Instagram, Tiktok, Ao3. everywhere!!

Because if these bills pass:..

Say goodbye to fandoms…

Say goodbye to fanfiction/fanart…

Say goodbye to LGBTQIA+ safe spaces…

Say goodbye to private messaging…

Say goodbye to proper sexual health education (including info about safe and healthy abortions)…

I am not exaggerating…

Bad Internet Bills

TELL CONGRESS TO STOP THE EARN IT ACT

Stop KOSA! | Linktree

Stop KOSA

Tell the UK’s House of Lords: Protect End-to-End Encryption in the Online Safety Bill

STOP THE EARN IT ACT | Linktree

Defend encryption: SAY NO to STOP CSAM

Donate to Stop the Bad Internet Bills

DM me for more questions.

For all my folks who live is US and UK.

rustbeltjessie:

yourlocalbreadenthusiast:

reasonsforhope:

wishgrantinglotus:

//TIME IS TICKING.

WE ONLY HAVE A FEW DAYS UNTIL KOSA IS DETERMINED. THERE IS A HUGE AUDIENCE OF PEOPLE TRYING TO PASS THIS BILL, BUT THE INTERNET IS BIGGER!

WE NEED ALL THE SUPPORT WE CAN GET.

CALL REPRESENTATIVES, TELL FAMILY, FRIENDS, MOOTS, LITERALLY EVERYONE YOU CAN.

IF THE BILL PASSES, THE INTERNET WILL BE CHANGED AS WE KNOW IT. IT WILL NOT MATTER IF YOU ARE OUT OF THE US. MANY FANDOM SPACES ARE IN AMERICAN DOMAIN.

YOU WILL NOT BE SAFE FROM USING A DIFFERENT EMAIL, ACCOUNT, ANYTHING. STOP BELIEVING THAT. THIS BILL WANTS CONTROL AS FAR BACK AS TRACING US BACK TO NAMES, AGES, GOVERNMENT IDS AND LICENSE PLATES.

YOU WILL NOT BE SAFE BECAUSE, “OH THIS BILL CAN’T PASS IT VIOLATES THE 1ST AMENDMENT!”. THEY HAVE PASSED UNCONSTITUTIONAL BILLS. YOU WILL NOT BE SAFE BECAUSE “OH, THIS BILL HASN’T PASSED FOR 2 YEARS!” THEY ARE AGGRAVATED. THEY ARE PUSHING FOR THIS BILL.

DO NOT FORGET KOSA MERELY BECAUSE A LACK OF UPDATES. I NEED YOU TO SIGN PETITIONS, CALL REPRESENTATIVES. DONT FORGET. I WANT YOU TO MAKE AS MUCH NOISE ABOUT KOSA POSSIBLE. DO NOT. FORGET. WE HAD THE TIME TO KEEP TALKING ABOUT KOSA, AND YET WE FORGOT BECAUSE OF A LACK OF UPDATES. THAT BRIEF TIME WAS NOT A COOLDOWN PERIOD. IT WAS A TIME TO KEEP KOSA TRENDING.

STOP GOING ON TIKTOK, COMMENTING “B00ST” AND THEN CALLING IT A DAY. YES THAT HELPS, BUT YOU NEED TO DO WHAT 90% OF THESE VIDEOS WANT YOU TO DO. SIGN PETITIONS. CALL REPRESENTATIVES. THE LEAST YOU COULD DO IS POST ABOUT KOSA YOURSELF.

If you’re in the United States, you can quickly look up your representatives at the link below.

You’ll want to call your House representative, both of your state’s senators, and President Biden and Vice President Harris (or as many of them as you can manage).

Most of their lines do not appear to be open for messages after hours, obnoxiously.

Find and contact elected officials | USAGov

You can also sign a petition and be automatically connected with key decisionmakers on the bill at the Stop KOSA website by Fight for the Future, found here:

Stop KOSA

I am begging you not to scroll past this, PLEASE reblog it. If this passes, that’s it. The internet will never be the same again. Our freedom online will be restricted and controlled.

You can sign/contact representatives via Resistbot, too!

Vote No on the Kids Online Safety Act (KOSA) S.1409

earnedmagic:

if you’re interested in mutual aid and aren’t sure where to start, i can’t recommend enough joining a local Buy Nothing group. in a nutshell, it’s a totally free gift economy— people give from their own abundance and ask for what they need. it’s indispensable as a recent grad household— we got the majority of our basic furniture, as well as an AC unit through the group— but what i find particularly wonderful are the ways other forms of community aid popup through the group.

i’ve seen people organize meal trains for strangers. people fleeing from domestic violence have gone from a suitcase of possessions to a fully stocked house in 48 hours. home hospices being set up with goods from six different households. cookbook lending. distribution of windfall apples and tomato harvest overabundance. grocery pickup for ill folks. people looking out for listings for others. everything from bread to baby carseats to house paint to pet food.

and much of it is done between strangers, often between people who would not recognize or identify with the term “mutual aid”. it lowers waste, goods go directly to people who need them, and it avoids the sometimes dubious morality of the thrift shop circuit. i’d really recommend it.

dsi-os:

HELP US KEEP OUR HOME! Emergency Fundraiser

We’re in risk of losing our home due to unfortunate circumstances, so we’re looking towards donations!! Please consider helping out or sharing!!

Help us keep our home! Emergency for urgent bills, organized by James Gonzalez

Please please PLEASE consider donating, and if you can’t, please share!

dicklessswonder:

attackwallaby:

YEAH BABY!

THE LAST OCTOBER THAT HAD A FRIDAY THE 13TH WAS SIX YEARS AGO!!!

TIME FOR…

DOUBLE HALLOWEEN!!!!!

i was gonna host a fucking party but NOOOOO. WE HAVE A FUCKING SHOW THAT NIGHT AT 7PM. DJFALKSDJFLKASDJF FUCK

computerexploder:

willgrahamscock:

willgrahamscock:

my favorite customer service slip ups

here are some extra ones that made me break out in tears enjoy

dogydogdog:

baristhyena-deactivated20230510:

carcinoguts-deactivated20230802:

im like if a boy was forced to do tasks

deactivated… emergency meeting

where did you last see op?

mayhem-moth-deactivated20250415:

mersinia:

mayhem-moth-deactivated20250415:

mersinia:

mayhem-moth-deactivated20250415:

mersinia:

mayhem-moth-deactivated20250415:

mersinia:

mayhem-moth-deactivated20250415:

mersinia:

mayhem-moth-deactivated20250415:

mersinia:

mayhem-moth-deactivated20250415:

mersinia:

shittest-wizard-ever:

evil-wild-lesbian-wizard:

slymewizard:

f4y3w00d5:

terri-theslime13:

tallyhoot:

synthshenanigans:

plutos134340:

desire-the-dogboy:

fire-but-ashes-too:

pb-dot:

15 Questions 15 Mutuals

@kaiarchives tagged me in this game that I haven’t had the pleasure of seeing before, so that’s exciting. The rules are: Answer the 15 questions and tag 15 of your mutuals.

Keep reading

thank youuuu!!

i think i did one with one of my OCs over here (please check it out im really proud of it eheh) but never done this for myself!

*cracks knuckles* here we goooo

Keep reading

Responding to this, thank you for the tag by the way

Are you named after anyone

Yes, I inherited one of my names from my father

When’s the last time you cried

I cannot fully remember, at some point when I was living with my mother though, that I remember

Any kids?

None

Do you use sarcasm?

No, I totally don’t use the one character trait I have

What’s the first thing you notice about people

The top of their head usually, or if they’re taller than me then how they speak

What’s your eye color

Dull brown

Scary movies or happy endings

My style of writing makes sad and scary films very cumbersome to me, so I prefer happy endings, I wanna smile yknow?

Any special talents?

I guess? I’m a producer so, music ig

Where were you born

Lagos nigeria

What are your hobbies

Writing, cooking, sewing, making music, eating

Do you have any pets?

None

Any sports you play?

Basketball sometimes

How tall are you

6'4

What’s your favorite subject

English

What’s your dream job

I dream of being rich.

Just kidding (not) I want to be a writer, and an author, and a music producer, and probably a musician, sounds like a lot but you’d be surprised

Thanks for going through and thanks to @fire-but-ashes-too for tagging me, I’m now tagging

@plutos134340 @delusionallovergirl1 @dancinginsepia @bassguitarinablackt-shirt @clearcloudlesssky @corpsecomplex @therainatdawn @zihus @its-time-to-rise-above @imahyperfixatedbitch @voidic3ntity @huffy-the-bicycle-slayer @holdmyteaplease @callofthecowards @toodumbforusernames

Thank u for the tag

Question time

Are you named after anyone?

Not my first name, my middle name is from my great grandmother tho

When is the last time you cried?

An hour ago 🥶

Any kids?

No

Do you use sarcasm?

Never (yes)

What is the first thing you notice about people?

Im not fully sure, maybe their facial expressions

Whats your eye color?

Hazel

Scary movies or happy endings

Happy endings

Any special talents?

I play the piano

Where were you born?

The US

What are your hobbies?

Playing piano, drawing, painting

Do you have any pets?

Yes, one dog

Any sports you play?

Soccer and tennis

How tall are you?

5'7

Whats your favorite subject?

English and history (when its not US history)

Whats your dream job?

I dont have one yet

Ill be tagging @its-time-to-rise-above @synthshenanigans @breadhalfburnt @alternative-snake @finleyforevermore @glugglestar /nf

Ooo questions are fun

Keep reading

YIPPEE A DISTRACTION!!!

1. Are you named after anyone? nah the name my parents picked out is just random.. i think

2. When was the last time you cried? this morning i was tired and having a hard time

3. Do you have kids? nope but I’ve done my fair share of parenting

4. What sports do you play/have played? competitive swimming (i don’t do it anymore)

5. Do you use sarcasm? i can hardly pick up on it but yes i do but jokingly

6. What’s the first thing you notice about people? their outfits and hair!

7. What’s your eye color? GREEN! :3

8. Scary movies or Happy endings? both!

9. Any talents? i can sing well (i used to do choir!) i play guitar! and i can name all of the starter Pokémon in every gen!

10. Where were you born? im not telling you! :3

11. What are your hobbies? music, drawing!

12. Do you have any pets? yes i do i have four! two dogs! and two cats!

13. How tall are you? i cant remember lmao

14. Favorite subject in school HASS and music!

15. Dream Job? i have no clue but i do joke about working at Subway and Woolworths (after very awkward forced talks with the workers)

TAGS: @terrencetheshark14 @willowplantcat @mizuthe-cat @illumiost /nf

Are you named after anyone: My irl/deadname is based on my dads name (and his dads, and his grandads, and his great-grandads), my online/chosen name is based off my shark plush

When was the last time you cried: a few days ago I think? (sorry about your morning 🫂🫂)

Do you have kids: No and I don’t want em

What sports do you play/have played: I dunno, I don’t really think any..

Do you use sarcasm: sometimes! but I’m bad at both picking it up and using it well

What’s the first thing you notice about people: usually their faces irl, the way they talk online

What’s your eye colour: Omg green twinsies!!! It’s also one of my favorite areas of green which is rlly cool :p

Scary movies or happy endings: I don’t like scary stuff much usually, but if it’s a happy ending it better be a well done one

Any talents: Cooking! I’m better than I’m confident in being haha

Where were you born: The ocean

What are your hobbies: singing, cooking, drawing, video games, swimming, biking (<- has barely done half of these in recent memory)

Do you have any pets: A black lab/great dane mix! his name is Rocco

How tall are you: Like, 172cm? just over 5'9

Favourite subject in school: I don’t have one

Dream job: Software development probably (realistic) or being a cowboy/ranch hand (unrealistic)

Mutuals!!

@bakersfield-row, @willowplantcat, @autistic-fuckwad, @kerri-the-skunk, @combustion-not-wizard, @whoevenisoliver, @falsegrey, @f4y3w00d5, @rocatex, @freelancefiend2112, @eggothesquirrel, @salt-and-tie, @ncsasp, @bacony-cakes, @lee-hakhyun.

Are you named after anyone: Not my irl name, or the one I use online. Idk where I got Faye from, but I think my irl name one is ‘beautiful’ in hebrew or yiddish

When was the last time you cried: Last Night

Do You Have Any Kids: Nope

What sports do/have you play(ed): Used to play soccer, afl, and cricket. (does Karate and yoga count?)

Do You Use Sarcasm: Hell yeah I do

Whats The First Thing You Notice About People: Online is when theyre online and pfp. Irl, I suppose the way they hold themselves.

Whats Your Eye Colour: Hazel, according to my mother, other peopl say green, blue or grey.

Scary Movies Or Happy Endings: Both, depending on my mood.

Any Talents: I mean I suppose trumpet and guitar playing? Maybe writing?

Where Were You Born: I was born in a hospital (And I’ll die in a hospital bed). In Brisbane. Maybe Capalaba?

What Are Your Hobbies: Writing, reading, and listening/playing music.

Do You Have Any Pets: Yeah! A black and white terrier (rescue) named Cinders.

How Tall Are You: … 153cm as of last week. so approx 5'1.

Favourite Subject In School: English! Probably cos I’m writing a novel lol

Dream Job: Author, and singer or guitarist in a band. If not, I want to work at a psych ward. I think its interesting to see how people are different, and if psych wards are bad i want to make them a little better.

Tags:

@monsterfucker-research-wizard @aileaxthevoidien @ashen-the-tiefling @qwertacius-boi @dead-immortal @thatgayforkcrow @animentality @lixorloveslicorice @slymewizard

Named after anyone: no

Last time I cried: 8 hours ago…I had a weird day

Kids: nah

Sports: I played soccer when I was like 5, and gymnastics when I was 7, and then nothing ever again but now Im interested in Tennis.

Sarcasm: no, I NEEEVER use sarcasm. I would NEEEVER even DREEEAAAM of being sarcastic GOD FORBIIIIID.

First thing I notice: their general vibe

Eye color: brown

Scary movies or happy endings: Im starting to like horror movies a bit more than usual but Ill still go with happy endings…assuming thats not a euphamism.

Talents: Im getting better at writing I guess.

Where was I born: not telling that

Hobbies: writing, videogames, thats about it

Pets: bnuy

Height: 5 ft 6

Favorite subject: creative writing

Dream job: tv show writer

@combustion-wizard @the-gnomish-bastard @villainessbian @lixorloveslicorice @crazyhairkid @cadmium64 @mephist0pheles @good-wizard @thatgayforkcrow @yourlocalbreadenthusiast @evil-wild-lesbian-wizard @aileaxthevoidien @mycelium-wizard @funny-short-man

THANKS FOR THE TAG!!!!

Are you named after anyone?

Yes a book character to be precise

Last time I cried

Last week over a bowl of spilt pasta

Kids?

I’m every manner except physically

Sports?

Lacrosse, gymnastics, volleyball(9yrs), soccer,tennis,softball,swimming,cheer,tap, ballet,pickle ball, racquet ball, basketball, karate,javelin,discus,track,wrestling

Sarcasm

All the damn time

First thing I notice about people

If they are attractive, then if they ask for my pronouns, then if they ask for my pronouns

Eye color

Blue

Scary movies or happy endings

Happy all the time, I’m a scared cat and I cried during coraline

Talents

Not anything really, I like reading, drawing, and cooking but I’m not good at anything

Where I was born

Yeah I’m not stupid enough to tell online people that

Hobbies

Sketching mostly, and bothering my girlfriend

Pets

a Rottweiler, and a terrier mix

Height

5’3

Favorite subject

Certified nursing assistant education

Dream job

House spouse

@shittest-wizard-ever @disasterofahuman @goofyjelly @hungry-skeleton @honeybeeboppin @healerwizard @a-patchofmoss @aroace-wizard @ima-snekk @oooohnoooooo @flghtorflight @lucifer-is-a-hermit @lixorloveslicorice @combustion-wizard @villainessbian

Deep breaths everybody

Keep reading

Didn’t expect this, I am scared, may my mutuals be as well

Keep reading

I already did this one, but i’ll gladly be your mutual!!

Heck yes, collected another mutual!

Also this post breaks my Tumblr more then my @mistakemode blog bc not only do I get intense lag, ive seen myself post this without posting it like 3 times now?

Damn that happens to me sometimes too. Especially with THIS POST.

There is no escape to friendship

Bahaha fool im not stuck with you your stuck with me

Actually, Tumblr will just stop me from being able to reblog at a certain point unless I get my laptop back, so really it’s just a case of you being stuck with me until it all comes crashing down

Also you seem nice so I don’t see it as being stuck with you but more like a hanging out with out for a while type of situation

The feeling is mutual(pun very much intended)

I don’t feel any apprehension towards talking to you or being your friend. In fact, it makes me happy. That’s why i said i would in the first place cause i wanted to. I could have ignored you, but i genuinely did not want to and wanted to be your friend.

SO NOW YOU ARE STUCK WITH ME MWAHAHAHAHA

As stuck as two chocolate chips in a cookie ^^

Yes :)

Now i want a cookie

I mean, I can bake you some…. They just won’t ever find you…..?

Haha, dont worry about it. i think there’s one somewhere. i just have to find it

Getting to the no reblog point, I can feel my phone struggling….

I am now actually just baking cookies at 1am

If can find milk I am atleast

I hope you find your cookies! And enjoy them a lot! Because you deserve it.

Mobile phone user solidarity

Enjoy your cookies as well!!

yeehawpim:

a comic about my name

this is just the way I look at it to feel empowered/at peace with how I’m called different names by different people

obviously it’s not the same for everyone but looking at it like this is just what made me happy

the-overgrown-states:

could i offer you some mole interest

Keep reading

darrellenjoyer:

BWAAAAHHHHH wake the fuck up everyone on earth

punksandcannonballers:

1980sspaceman:

punksandcannonballers:

punksandcannonballers:

just found the most fucked up plane

bro what

bro how do you think airplanes get between airports

homophobinnit-deactivated202409:

homophobinnit-deactivated202409:

the way my stomach dropped when I read Reagan and interpreted it as ronald reagan I need to go lie down for a little bit

10k horny porn bot ronald reagan sweep I fucking guess

vaporfunk-archive-blog:

no matter how many followers you have the same 10 people will reblog posts from you

soraka-in-warhammer40k:

bfleuter:

The Pizzaman - a lil comic based on a dream I had.

Average warp encounter

hiddendragontavern:

cryptotheism:

cryptotheism:

People making fun of me for owning tarot cards is not a real problem. This is not an axis of oppression. It is not “rooted in misogyny” or “denying a rich history” it is fundamentally not a problem. If anything, they’re right. Tarot cards are kinda cringe. I’m an adult. My haircut is cringe. Who cares.

God forbid someone on the internet make fun of you for having a strange hobby. However will you survive.

You’re a skeleton, how do you have hair?

mayhem-moth:

froody:

froody:

Me, fighting a yoga mom in the organic food market circa 2023: take your hand off that peach or I’ll vaccinate your children against polio

fascinating post I made in 2018

You jinxed us all how could you?

mlm-blues:

he makes me giggle and want to jump around like a grasshopper <3

system-reset:

I love humans because they never learn. you guys are so frustratingly incapable of foreseeing your own future even when it’s extremely obvious.

“oh these bad people got away with bad things again” yes darling that happens because it’s happened a million times before and nobody has the guts to blow up an unused train about it in real life.

you’ve got all these movies about people taking on the task of doing something about it themselves but none of you want to follow up on that. it’s horrible to watch, and I’d help you but frankly I truly believe this is something you have to figure out on your own.

synthient:

peoplegettingkindamadatfood:

cykelops:

me: wish games had choices that actually mattered

me when games have choices that actually matter:

dykesndrugs:

whatever *becomes weirder out of spite*

unrulytgirl:

literally me

gehinnom:

I cannot emphasize this enough as a practical life skill: learn how to say no to authority figures. Learn how to tell them that nothing they can do to you will change your mind. Disappoint your parents. You have to live your own life.

sealsdaily:

Today’s Seal Is: Making Friends

digitaldiscipline:

raytoroapologist:

sanguinifex:

sexygaywizard:

raytoroapologist:

“i love music i wish i could hold it” well you can it’s called a CD and it’s got a hole and everything

TONIGHT WE FUCK MUSIC!!!

My man you may not want to announce you can fit through that small a hole

y ou are all so jealous of my thin meat

something CD fucker and the guy who invented prosciutto have both said

touhouweed:

touhouweed:

I just want queer safety and queer happiness

and a queer $500k

kira-serialfaggot:

sovereign-skyy:

esthermika:

gruwuzin:

puppygirl-hornyposting:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

sovereign-skyy:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

tyke-dyke:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

esthermika:

eri-lessthan3:

the-mighty-nappa:

eri-lessthan3:

the-mighty-nappa:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

puppygirl-hornyposting:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

heirtocragflame:

nick-nonya:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

What if you put toothpaste on your dick and I used it as a toothbrush😍

How to Detect Carbon Monoxide: Warning Signs and Prevention

No, you will not do this to me!

I refuse to let the fucking toothbrush post be my legacy on the internet

reblog, teasing sam by making this her legacy just like neb is known for soup

sorry the what

Oh, you are missing out on some serious lore ;p

W-would you care to inform me hun? It sounds too interesting to not hear about it.

I guess only if @esthermika wanted that ;p

@the-mighty-nappa

So. It started with a post: “Call me pizza the way I moz her ella”. Pretty good post i thought. I made that post because someone bragged to me about eating pizza and i got jelly about it. Later, when I got my pizza, I made the second post: “Sloppy pizza sex with mozzarella lube and semen cheese”. Then someone decided that i would funny tell me to eat cum covered pizza. I went along with the joke and now i’m cursed with pizza fucker jokes forever more.

hey have you seen pilf.gif? she is saved in my computer for totally non-nefarious reasons

@esthermika you might not be the onky pizzafucker anymore gawddahm

Aand just like that the toothpaste dick post is back on your blog, it has come full circle

toothbrush dick

I-I-I… it’s way beyond me…

not this fucking post again

AGAIN. AGAIN. AGAIN. AGAIN.

This is a masterpiece

ONCE MORE ROUND THE BLOCK FOR FUN!

kira-serialfaggot:

sovereign-skyy:

esthermika:

gruwuzin:

puppygirl-hornyposting:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

sovereign-skyy:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

tyke-dyke:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

esthermika:

eri-lessthan3:

the-mighty-nappa:

eri-lessthan3:

the-mighty-nappa:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

puppygirl-hornyposting:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

heirtocragflame:

nick-nonya:

momusu-saval-deactivated2024010:

What if you put toothpaste on your dick and I used it as a toothbrush😍

How to Detect Carbon Monoxide: Warning Signs and Prevention

No, you will not do this to me!

I refuse to let the fucking toothbrush post be my legacy on the internet

reblog, teasing sam by making this her legacy just like neb is known for soup

sorry the what

Oh, you are missing out on some serious lore ;p

W-would you care to inform me hun? It sounds too interesting to not hear about it.

I guess only if @esthermika wanted that ;p

@the-mighty-nappa

So. It started with a post: “Call me pizza the way I moz her ella”. Pretty good post i thought. I made that post because someone bragged to me about eating pizza and i got jelly about it. Later, when I got my pizza, I made the second post: “Sloppy pizza sex with mozzarella lube and semen cheese”. Then someone decided that i would funny tell me to eat cum covered pizza. I went along with the joke and now i’m cursed with pizza fucker jokes forever more.

hey have you seen pilf.gif? she is saved in my computer for totally non-nefarious reasons

@esthermika you might not be the onky pizzafucker anymore gawddahm

Aand just like that the toothpaste dick post is back on your blog, it has come full circle

toothbrush dick

I-I-I… it’s way beyond me…

not this fucking post again

AGAIN. AGAIN. AGAIN. AGAIN.

This is a masterpiece

ONCE MORE ROUND THE BLOCK FOR FUN!

nyancrimew:

“#he would say this”, no he wouldn’t, his writers are on strike

just-illegal:

lily-stabby:

So imagine a DnD character who’s whole motivation is ‘X guy killed my parents and I need to find them’ and the party just thinks ‘ok, revenge quest, that’s normal’

But when they finally find the guy the person with dead parents is just like “Hey buddy, long time no see. It’s a shame we got separated, here’s some money” and they’re super chill.

The party is just confused and goes “Wait, why are you giving him gold?”

The guy just goes “Cause I owe him money?”

The party “But he killed your parents???”

“That’s why I owe him money!”

paper-mario-wiki:

testosteronetwunk:

The two brothers, Vyvanse the Calm, and Viagra the Turgid.

acekoral:

localvoidcat:

localvoidcat:

localvoidcat:

bad news guys i’ve developed the habit of just giving a thumbs-up whenever i see anything i like. this includes things i like online

i can’t stop

i also want to mention that on occasion i’ll stand up and do the sparkle on jerma pose blankly at a wall for a couple seconds and then go back to normal. i don’t know whats up with that either

Ever see a post so good that you start emoting

riseofthecommonwoodpile:

riseofthecommonwoodpile:

smartphone storage plateauing in favor of just storing everything in the cloud is such dogshit. i should be able to have like a fucking terabyte of data on my phone at this point. i hate the fucking cloud

this is gonna make me sound very Old Man Yells At Cloud but i just hate how many things in my life assume i will always have access to a quick, reliable internet connection and almost cease to function without it. Obviously certain things Have To Have An Internet Connection, but i want to be able to listen to music if my service is bad. i want to still watch movies if Netflix is down. i want to have a working map when i can’t get a cell signal. nearly every tech product these days bears the fingerprint of the extremely internet-rich places they are developed, high rent offices in Seattle, San Francisco, etc.. I think often the idea of the internet not being available is so remote to them it doesn’t even factor in to development. i remember when the Xbox One was debuted and Microsoft was almost mockingly like “if you don’t have reliable fast internet, then don’t bother buying this”, and there was such backlash they completely went back on so much of that. But now that attitude is just the tech norm.

alexs-random-bullshit:

a-mushroom-wizard-deactivated20:

aroace-wizard:

jaynotwayne:

lightbluedaisie-deactivated2022:

lightbluedaisie-deactivated2022:

The urge to bother my mutuals

reblog if it’s okay for your mutuals to bother you <3

Bother me

IM OK WITH BEING BOTHERED!

Bother me!!!!

alexs-random-bullshit:

thestoryofaslut:

escuerzoresucitado:

about fucking time

FUCKING FINALLY

brazilianturtle:

7 is weird

this has been driving me kind of mad for a while, but just now i have decided to post on tumblr this rant of mine.

it has the most complex divisibility rule (which is that, to check if a number is divisible by 7, double the unit, subtract the result with the tens unit, e.g. 14 is divisible by 7 because 4 * 2 = 8, which

8 - 1 = 7, which is divisible by 7), it’s a prime number, which already makes it kind of weird, but here it adds onto the weirdness of 7 and finally, most of the numbers which are divisible by it sounds like bullshit, 14, 21, 28, 63 and 70 i can believe, 35 already is kind of making me not comfortable being there, 42 is just bullshit, 49? what the actual fuck, 56’s presence is making me want to congratulate all STEM majors for having to put up with this shit

headspace-hotel:

liminalstrands:

enki2:

Good news! It gets worse!

I think it’s the galactic orbit thing that really did me in

And yet, the Appalachian Mountains are even older than that.

someoneelsemaybe:

the-haiku-bot:

catboybiologist:

sushigal007:

donthitanybody:

Tomska going hard on Twitter again.

My Twitter account once got suspended because I replied to a guy with this meme and they said it was a death threat.

Meanwhile on Tumblr, I can openly fantasize about how much I’d like to see Boris Johnson get hit by a bus, and nobody bats an eye.

This is why I roll my eyes when someone says they got “death threats online”

Because okay, did someone give a credible and motivated threat to your well being? Or did someone send you a shitty photoshopped jpeg compressed image of an anime girl with a gun?

This is why I roll

my eyes when someone says they

got “death threats online”

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.