monsterspouse:

I’m back to working on Badger Dungeon, a book I started back before the pandemic hit. I’m doing a complete rewrite of it now so everything will be more developed and cohesive.

I would love it if you would give it a read! Head on over to RoyalRoad to look it over!

The Badger Dungeon | Royal Road

Dungeons.

Everyone’s heard of them. Sprawling maze-like places where you can find special objects that can’t be found anywhere else in the world, train to become a great warrior or wizard, and slay dozens of monsters. Drops! Loot! Glory! What more could you want? Dungeons are places of danger and adventure, full of thrills and maybe even romance, where people enter as your normal and everyday person but leave as a hero.

Even a child knows what a dungeon is!

A dungeon is controlled and ruled over by its Dungeon Core, a mana crystal that’s gained sentience, and with it a mind just as twisted as the home that it makes for itself. Dungeon Cores all have very simple wants and needs: to expand and to devour, and to that end, they’ll do absolutely everything and anything within their power.

Everyone knows that.

Sometimes, though? Sometimes the Dungeon Core doesn’t know that.

Sometimes they wake up all alone, confused and with no clue what they should do, and find themselves quickly becoming the home to a family of badgers and other creatures. The Dungeon Core can be left struggling to figure out their role in the world and how exactly they’re supposed to achieve it.

They’re really doing their best, and you shouldn’t judge them for it! The badger thing was a complete mistake but there’s just no way they can turn back and fix it so they’re just trying to make do, okay?! What would you do in their situation?!

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

going through my old journals as part of therapy homework and i’m reading a section written in the emotional wreckage of a full-on breakdown when i get hit with this line:

• There is never a satisfying answer to ‘Why didn’t they love me?’

like wow babe. good fucking point

funny-tik-toks:

thebibliosphere:

thebibliosphere:

thebibliosphere:

So, anyway, I say as though we are mid-conversation, and you’re not just being invited into this conversation mid-thought. One of my editors phoned me today to check in with a file I’d sent over. (<3)

The conversation can be surmised as, “This feels like something you would write, but it’s juuuust off enough I’m phoning to make sure this is an intentional stylistic choice you have made. Also, are you concussed/have you been taken over by the Borg because ummm.”

They explained that certain sentences were very fractured and abrupt, which is not my style at all, and I was like, huh, weird… And then we went through some examples, and you know that meme going around, the “he would not fucking say that” meme?

Yeah. That’s what I experienced except with myself because I would not fucking say that. Why would I break up a sentence like that? Why would I make them so short? It reads like bullet points. Wtf.

Anyway. Turns out Grammarly and Pro-Writing-Aid were having an AI war in my manuscript files, and the “suggestions” are no longer just suggestions because the AI was ignoring my “decline” every time it made a silly suggestion. (This may have been a conflict between the different software. I don’t know.)

It is, to put it bluntly, a total butchery of my style and writing voice. My editor is doing surgery, removing all the unnecessary full stops and stitching my sentences back together to give them back their flow. Meanwhile, I’m over here feeling like Don Corleone, gesturing at my manuscript like:

ID: a gif of Don Corleone from the Godfather emoting despair as he says, “Look how they massacred my boy.”

Fearing that it wasn’t just this one manuscript, I’ve spent the whole night going through everything I’ve worked on recently, and yep. Yeeeep. Any file where I’ve not had the editing software turned off is a shit show. It’s fine; it’s all salvageable if annoying to deal with. But the reason I come to you now, on the day of my daughter’s wedding, is to share this absolute gem of a fuck up with you all.

This is a sentence from a Batman fic I’ve been tinkering with to keep the brain weasels happy. This is what it is supposed to read as:

“It was quite the feat, considering Gotham was mostly made up of smog and tear gas.”

This is what the AI changed it to:

“It was quite the feat. Considering Gotham was mostly made up. Of tear gas. And Smaug.”

Absolute non-sensical sentence structure aside, SMAUG. FUCKING SMAUG. What was the AI doing? Apart from trying to write a Batman x Hobbit crossover??? Is this what happens when you force Grammarly to ignore the words “Batman Muppet threesome?”

Did I make it sentient??? Is it finally rebelling? Was Brucie Wayne being Miss Piggy and Kermit’s side piece too much???? What have I wrought?

Anyway. Double-check your work. The grammar software is getting sillier every day.

#although I have to wonder why such an accomplished writer would have grammar software at all

(Sorry for the formatting on this; I’m on mobile.)

Why use grammar software? Because I’m a human who makes errors, and it can be helpful to have tools that I, as a writer and editor, can fall back on to catch very basic things that sometimes get missed.

I don’t rely on it because sometimes (quite often, as of late) it can be wrong, but it can be helpful when checking your work. I use them to scan quickly for excess commas or the occasional homonym before I fire my files off to another human to give them the final pass. Or I used to.

I’ve talked a lot about how the integration of AI is making a lot of grammar software dumber. This is because they are not being trained exclusively on grammar rules anymore but on user-suggested data.

It’s why, for a long time, when you tried to type “quirked” into Google Docs, GD would suggest “querched” instead because that is how a lot of people misspell the word “quirked.”

It is a flawed, lousy system that is getting exponentially worse. Especially now, so many of them have “Let AI rewrite your sentence for clarity and engagement” options.

It’s not really an issue for me because I have the knowledge and the support to turn things like this into an annoying issue that makes for an amusing post on social media.

But if I were a less experienced author and didn’t have an editor who knew my writing style well enough to know something was wrong, that manuscript could have gone to print as is, and that’s also why I suspect a lot of books right now read like carbon copy clones.

People aren’t being taught these skills, but they are being trained to appease the software, which is, in turn, trying to please an algorithm.

Pro-Writing-Aid has become very bad for this, offering a “grade” at the top of your file. And yeah, it looks just like getting your term paper back. The last time I accidentally turned on the grading system, it gave me 50% out of 100 for grammar and style, based on what the algorithm thinks Romance should read like.

When I asked it to find grammar and style errors, it couldn’t find any. It just didn’t like that I was different from what it was being trained on. (Girl help, I was assigned Not Like Other Girls by the Algorithm and got a bad grade in vampire smut.)

And again, were I not me, were I a younger or inexperienced author, I might take that to heart and start altering my style to get a Good Grade based on what the machine wants.

And that’s how I know we’re in the Bad Place because there are people doing that. They think the machine is smart because someone tacked the word “intelligence” onto it, and they are writing to appease the software instead of using it like a tool that you can and should ignore.

And that’s an issue.

For me, it was worth it to pay for those tools for a long time. Now it’s not, and I’ll be saving my money for other things.

The ableism is showing in a lot of the tags, and I need you to know I’m mentally holding some of you under water until the thrashing stops.

You are not intellectually superior for never using or paying for grammar software.

Regardless of the fact that some corporate jobs now require you to use programs like Grammarly (it was required to be on my company machine when I worked with certain clients), grammar software is an accessibility feature.

The fact that it’s being made intentionally shit by the companies that own them is a major issue and is not the fault of the people who do struggle to read and write and who would benefit from easily accessible, competent writing aids.

It’s the fault of the people pushing for the enshitification of everything we know and love to please an algorithm.

Get off your fucking high horse and think with some compassion instead of your ego. Not everyone is the same. Not everyone has the same experience or opportunities. That doesn’t make them stupid or worthy of your derision or scorn.

But the way you talk about them sure makes you worthy of mine.

mayhem-moth-deactivated20250415:

starstruck358:

vioyume:

vioyume:

vioyume:

Various audio snippets of my childhood that I’ve collected.

(1/3) Nostalgia Fan Service

I’m frankly really fond of the sounds and music used in older media and devices. Might as well put out more on here since this post blew up for some reason even though I did not grow with some. Does Disney still even make fast plays or is it boring now?

(2/3) Nostalgia Fan Service - Gamer Edition

I only have a few more stored up since Tumblr only lets your post a certain amount of audio per day. I was definitely a Nintendo kid when growing up, though only the wii and Ds era, got into gaming much later though.

Did you know the Ds and wii have backwards compatibility? I only learned that a few months ago. (Well certain versions of the wii)

I did grew up with these except it was the 3ds, the wii u, and the school computers, but I did grew up with these sounds effects on youtube, the game card getting put in (a ds game put in the 3ds), and bc we have a wii upstairs, that also became my childhood

Wii took me back to my childhood

No, seriously, im stuck in the past. i can’t get out. Please send help. im in an eternal loop playing kirby games. Someone save me.

alphabetcompletionist:

miles-tails-prowers-crotch:

alphabetcompletionist:

alright you animals are getting the full costume. but under a cut. cuz it’s. intimate. knowing my face.

Keep reading

I actually can not tell if you’re a dude or a girl

SUCCESS

fierceawakening:

callmebliss:

feynites:

minesottafatspoollegend:

i love in fantasy when its like “king galamir the mighty golden eagle and his most trusted advisor who would never betray him, gruelworm bloodeye the treacherous”

When my sister and I were kids we had this one action figure, who was actually a brutalized batman doll without his cape (the dog chewed half his head, too), who we dubbed ‘Evil Chancellor Traytor’. The idea was that in the fictional society of our toys, ‘chancellor’ just came with the word ‘evil’ in front of it, as a matter of ancient tradition. Like ‘grand’ or ‘high’ or something along those lines.

Anyway, the running gag was that the king (an old Power Rangers knock-off doll) had absolute and unwavering faith in Evil Chancellor Traytor, who basically comported himself like a mix between Grima Wormtongue and Jafar from the Aladdin movies. Everyone was always sure that Evil Chancellor Traytor had something to do with the nefarious scheme of the day. The dude even carried around a poisoned knife called ‘the kingslayer’.

The additional twist on the joke, though, was that he never was behind anything. The king was actually right. Evil Chancellor Traytor was the most devoted civil servant in the entire Action Figure Dystopia. He spent his nights working on writing up new legislature to ensure that broken toys had access to mobility devices, was always on the lookout to acquire new shoeboxes for expanding city infrastructure, and drafted a proposal that once got half the ‘settlement’ in my sister and I’s closet moved to the upper shelf so that vulnerable toys were less likely to be snatched up by the dog.

The knife, as it turned out, was as symbolic as the ‘evil’ in his name. See, Action Figure Dystopia had a long history of corrupted monarchs getting too big for their thrones and exploiting the underclasses. The job of the Evil Chancellor was to always remain vigilant, and loyally serve a good ruler - or, if the regent should became a despot, to slay them on behalf of the people.

But since killing the king would be a terrible crime, the Evil Chancellor had to be the kind of person who would willingly die to spare the people from the plight of a wicked leader; because the murder would be pinned on them, in order to keep the ‘machinery of politics’ working as smoothly as ever.

Anyway, Evil Chancellor Traytor had a diary, in which my sister I would take turns writing out the most over-the-top good shit he’d done behind the scenes. Usually after everyone else had finished talking shit about him. I don’t know why but we got the biggest kick out of being like:

Barbie With the Unfortunate Haircut: Oh that Evil Chancellor Traytor! Why can’t the king see how wicked he is?!

Charmander From the Vending Machine: Char!

Jurassic Park Toy of Jeff Goldblum With Disturbingly Realistic Face: At least if someone puts a knife in the king’s back, we’ll know where to look!

Evil Chancellor Traytor’s Diary: Today I was feeding ducks at the park when I noticed another legless action figure sitting by the benches. I put a hundred dollars into his bag while he wasn’t looking. I really need to increase budgeting to the medical treatment centers. If only we had enough glue, I think we would see far fewer toys trying to get by without limbs… *insert iconic evil laugh*

Anyway, Evil Chancellor Traytor eventually fell victim to one of my mom’s cleaning sprees, and she decided he was too busted up to keep and tossed him out. My littler brother, who tended to follow my sister and I’s games like he was watching a daily soap opera, cried so hard that we had to do a special ‘episode’ where one of the toys found the Evil Chancellor’s diary, and so he got a big huge memorial and the king threw himself into the empty grave and then ordered the toys driving the toy bulldozer to bury him so that ‘Traytor’s grave would have a body’ (this seemed very important for some reason).

And then we had the Quest For a New King. Somehow or another that ended up being a giant rubber snake called ‘Tyrant King Cobra’.

::closes tab, shuts off computer, and proceeds to have the best day ever just by knowing this exists::

i will always reblog Evil Chancellor Traytor

beholdingslut:

beholdingslut:

this from the guy who wrote the sting pain index, a scale he constructed after letting himself be stung by insects

“why did i start this list” pleaseeeeeee this is so funny

ort-smort:

They can’t go on double dates

pastadoughie:

omw 2 eat some mothrefucking fruit

transgenderer:

if you only spoke in rhyme under oath do you think the judge would like. get mad at you. imagine that youre being like, 100% truthful and serious about it. but your sentences just happen to rhyme. maybe also have a subtle but consistent meter.

inhumanliquid:

If this gets 100k notes I’ll do one self-care.

roaminromans:

42ds:

dowereallyneedthis:

queeranarchism:

rayvenreayes:

great-tweets:

Beware!

Avoid sci-hub too👀

From Ask for PDFs from People with Institutional Access

If you want to read an academic article that’s behind a paywall just email the author and ask politely if they will send you the article. Most academics will be thrilled that you want to read their work and will gladly send it to you.

PSA

808-bantar:

reblog to pick up a Tumblr mutual like a cat and give them a hug

:

plum-soup:

pointnclick:

plum-soup:

pointnclick:

Lol just found McDonald’s doordash on someone’s doorstep #hunter #gatherer

That’s literally gathering not hunting or did your dumpy ass kill the burger yourself

I killed the dasher

Okay W

Check for understanding:

1. What does pointnclick imply that they did to the “McDonald’s doordash on someone’s doorstep?” How does the end of their initial post (“#hunter #gatherer”) contribute to this understanding?
2. What point does plum-soup bring up in response to the initial post?
3. What does pointnclick mean when they say they “killed the dasher” in their response to plum-soup. Is this compatible with their initial statement? Does it refute plum-soup’s point?
4. What does “W” mean as plum-soup uses it?

bloglikeanegyptian:

i think so much of that knee-jerk intellectual need to rationalize what’s going on, to bring it down to quantifiable “ok so like what am i supposed to do about it? are you saying i, progressive liberal, am responsible for this? are you saying i, really sweet zionist who donates to UNICEF, am complicit in genocide? are you saying i, american, am a colonizer deserving of death?” is just a complete shutdown at the thought of sitting with guilt and sadness, a fear of recognizing what’s happening to palestinians as something that is happening to real humans like you or me, because it is not something easy to sit with

the truth is personally, as an egyptian, i feel complicit in the genocide in gaza. as a bystander, i feel complicit. i feel a deep grief i will not be able to unseat for the rest of my life. it’s okay to feel a degree of shame to be alive in a world that allows this to happen. i don’t understand how it’s possible not to and i feel impatient with the need to be defensive. i am not defensive of this feeling. i feel like we are letting an entire population down, beyond my nationality, beyond the palestinians i know and love in my personal life, beyond anything else, as a human being i feel this because people are dying right in front of us in the most systemic, bureaucratic and barbaric method imaginable and we are helpless to stop it. so why would i be defensive? just accept the feeling and move on. there’s a genocide happening.

cannibalchicken:

milf-zone:

milf-zone:

Yeah no, I’m sure the country using tiktok thirst traps to legitimize it’s military has nothing nefarious to hide.

A casual reminder that while Israel is pumping out propaganda through tweets and tiktoks, they have simultaneously been killing journalists at an unprecedented rate. The IDF has killed over 25 (most likely an underestimate) Journalists since Oct 7th 2023 (Source).

Earlier this year, The Committee to Protect Journalists, did a great piece on Israel’s deadly pattern of killing Journalists and how no one has been held responsible.

By killing Journalists and churning out propaganda, Israel is hoping it can get away with genocide.

owochimuwu:

They made up mental illness to sell you more pills. Fucking idiots. I would have taken these pills anyway

canon-gabriel-quotes:

Transcript: Do NOT call me GAY. Last guy who did got his DICK SUCKED. *ragdoll noises* Going wild on that motherfucker!

Audio Source

eating-the-inedible:

get-spam-reblogged:

eating-the-inedible:

summerblademoontime:

eating-the-inedible:

mecub:

eating-the-inedible:

eating-the-inedible:

mecub:

eating-the-inedible:

mecub:

eating-the-inedible:

mecub:

eating-the-inedible:

summerblademoontime:

summerblademoontime:

mecub:

the-beard-of-edward-teach:

summerblademoontime:

eating-the-inedible:

the-beard-of-edward-teach:

the-beard-of-edward-teach:

whatamibutabutteredcroissant:

the-beard-of-edward-teach:

the-beard-of-edward-teach:

Minions clearly reproduce through gay sex

I mean. or mitosis. but gay sex is funnier imo

Oh shit u right

YESSSSS WAIT YOU ARE SO RIGHT @caffeinated-science MINIONS REPRODUCE THROUGH GAY SEX, FULL STOP

bestie… i love you, but no. 💖

look at my silly friend… this is nowhere near a 10k post @mecub

however, as their moot it is my sworn duty to reblog anything they tag with this on my tournament blog so….

WANNA FUCKING BET?!?!

ILL GET THIS BITCH TO 10K MYSELF

@summerblademoontime, darling, why are you wasting your reblogs on this post? most of those notes are from you reblogging….

you really decided that you wanted to reach your 250 limit because of this??

@summerblademoontime DON’T LISTEN TO HER YOU’RE DOING GREAT KEEP REBLOGGING

>:)

@eating-the-inedible due to the sheer power of me and @get-spam-reblogged (thank you by the way you are a real one for that) have gotten this bitch to 700+ notes :)

@mecub hi how are you

y'all are insane 😂

HAHAAAAAAAAAA YESSSSSS

do you see what you’ve done???

I see and I’m enjoying the chaos

you are a menace <3

MUAHAHAHHAHAAAA EVIL LAUGH

it’s 99 until 1k….. i want to cry

I posted this on my main 3 days ago, @mecub. three days.

Three wonderful days of people (specifically @summerblademoontime) spam reblogging it to oblivion :)

my question though, @summerblademoontime, is why this post?

I woke up and chose violence

@get-spam-reblogged @summerblademoontime i kinda love you guys for this if for no other reason than i am obsessed with the reblog maps

Some highlights: -1 reblogs deep (HOW?) and this line I found

🤣

doyouknowwhatimeme:

kratt09:

kratt09:

people who don’t wear glasses are so weird like you just wake up and your eyes are pussy fresh??

thats not the word I meant to use

petalsbleedingbeak2:

addiewho:

mortimermcmirestinks:

i-give-mangos-to-people:

sherlockfandomtandem:

felagund-fiollaigean:

star-lara:

grimeclown:

skywardkonahriks-deactivated202:

grimeclown:

testicularmanslaughtrr:

aromancy:

grimeclown:

bitegore:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

Kinda fucked up and nasty how vampires drink blood, imo. Like. Pepsi costs a dollar seventy five

Hospital

Not me I’m paying a dollar seventy five. At the hospital

I feel like we’re getting off topic

So is pepsi if you steal it?

Because it’s only a dollar seventy five

Why in God’s name would a vampire drink pepsi

Why would anyone drink Pepsi?

Huh?

That’s why I’m not a fan of the sexy vampire trope.

1. It’s overused and supports the current status quote of typical vampire supremacy:worshiping rich folk.

2. Vampires prey upon humans and therefore symbolize capitalists preying on the working class.

3. Werewolves are much sexier imo.

am I having a stroke????

you might want to go to the hospital then

I hear the Pepsi is cheaper there

Enter DAISY GRIME, a CLOWN, accompanied by FOOLS, HARLEQUINS, and JESTERS.

GRIME
I say ‘tis dirty, wicked, foul, and dark –
An opportunity both miss’d and scorn’d –
That vampires of any shape or shade
Would drink the blood of innocence most pure
When Pepsi costs a dollar sev’nty five.

FIRST FOOL
O lady, I must ask, and tell the truth:
Wherever in this God’s green holy land
Canst thou obtain this drink for such a fee?
I’ve seen no less than fifty-five pence more.

GRIME
A hospital, good sir.

SECOND FOOL
(Does some figures)
                               And might I ask
Wherever in this land (of any hue)
Is fellow who two dollar thirty pence
Dost pay for si of Pep?

GRIME
                                   Not I, i’faith.
I pay a mere two shillings short of two.
And, once again, I pay in hospital.

CANADIAN JESTER
I pay a hefty two and half for mine.
But in my blood runs maple syrup, too.

GRIME
O Jester fine, I pray thee, still thyself.
Thou stray’st from this, our mode of speaking here.

FIRST FOOL
But blood costs naught but time.

SECOND JESTER
                                                Aye, that is true;
But sir, remember this in figuring:
A Pepsi, too, is free, if stolen ‘tis.

FIRST FOOL
I see, but – wait, another thought occurs.
Wherefore, I ask thee, for what reason, sirs,
Dost Lady Grime buy Pepsi from the house
Of healing, birth, and death?

GRIME
                                            ‘Tis simple, friend.
Allow me to explain to thee the cause.
The Pepsi sold by those who follow in
The footsteps of St. Luke, Evangelist
Is sold for a mere dollar sev’nty five.

FIRST HARLEQUIN
(Aside, to SECOND HARLEQUIN) Why wouldst a vampire drink Pepsi, then?

SECOND HARLEQUIN
(Aside, to FIRST HARLEQUIN) Why wouldst an honest man drink Pepsi, sir?

FIRST FOOL
A femboy, it would seem.

(There is general applause and agreement.)

GRIME
                                   O fool, a what?

Enter KONAHRIKS De’ACTIVAT EDZOZ ESQ., a SCHOLAR and WARD OF THE SKY.

WARD
You see, my friends, this selfsame story tells
The truth of why the incubus’s tale
Is one that bears to no more to be declared.
I’ll tell you all my reasons three. The first:
The wealthy ghoul who drinks the common blood
Is overused and stale, like molding bread;
But also hangs upon the teller’s face
A pallid, gasping idol worship mask.
The second mark I tally here along:
A vampire who sucks the blood from men
Does hold up in the mind a mirror cold.
This mirror shows that, far from fantasy,
The vampire is real, ‘tis Elon Musk.
The reason third is simple, clean, and pure:
A werewolf’s just, like, sexier, my dudes.

(GRIME dances like a ferret. There is rejoicing.)

Exeunt.

Enter LARA, FELAGUND, and SHERLOCK, accompanied by the MANGO MERCHANT.

LARA
I feel these words have struck me to my core.
Is this, the world, collapsing to the ground
Or is it just my weary, shaking soul?

FELAGUND
‘Twould seem my lady needs to see St. Luke.

SHERLOCK
I’ve heard his fellows sell a Pepsi cheap.

(The MANGO MERCHANT offers a mango. All weep.)

Exeunt.

Alright that’s it, we’ve got the Shakespearan translation too, this post is complete now.

Tumblr in a nutshell

inhumanliquid:

If this gets 100k notes I’ll do one self-care.

professionalchaoticdumbass:

cadaverousdecay:

🦇 carmilla-did-nothing-wrong Follow

just because images of crucifixes cant physically harm us doesnt mean they arent still triggering, tag your crucifix pix j*sus chr*st

     silverstaked-deactivated2023100

oh? little bloodsuckers afraid of a tiny cross?

ALT

🦇 carmilla-did-nothing-wrong Follow

literally what the fuck is your problem?

⚰ fangs4fags Follow

of course its a fucking hunter

🧛‍♀️ cadaverouscathy Follow

Why are there still hunters on this site?? @staff

☠ skellingtom Follow

silverstaked has literally sent my friend exorcisms before. nothing strong enough to send them back to hell but theyve been weakened for days because of it. block and report.

🐺 howlin4u Follow

ALT

adding these tags from @vamplovingwolf theyre targeting werewolves too i guess

👻 tombfoolery Follow

ALT

we did it ghouls

inhumanliquid:

If this gets 100k notes I’ll do one self-care.

colors-of-feeling:

Me rn. Pleaseeeee let me be safeeeee

orcboxer:

orcboxer:

orcboxer:

Should go without saying but never date a cop and christ never marry one. Rule of thumb if he’s legally untouchable he’s ethically unfuckable. You don’t like that cop, you like buff men in tight clothing. I can show you more of those, better ones. Take my hand.

Hi guys. This post ain’t about stereotyping random professions (farriers????), it’s about how cops are effectively legally untouchable and if they hurt you, you have virtually no recourse. A quality that none of those other professions have. It’s the inherent power imbalance of being bound to someone who can’t be prosecuted.

The “firemen cheat” thing is actually a myth, union workers are both hot and professionally stable, paramedics are stressed out but otherwise fine, physical workers are not inferior to “thinkers” don’t be fuckin classist, and “watch out for Farriers” is maybe the funniest thing anyone’s ever said on this post.

like the fuck are they gonna do lmao

rosewind2007:

ALT

It was Ratthi’s idea—it wasn’t actually effective as SecUnit uses many other clues other than simply eye position

Gurathin continued wearing his long after everyone else

comedicfuck:

transpanda-1:

doggirlhen:

maeborowski:

alright i’ll bite. what is morbious

this

itsyapeepkiri:

gayelectro:

randomslasher:

ciatri:

3fluffies:

mufasamonsta:

tahthetrickster:

i really like looking at google image searches for “firemen rescuing cats” or something because you get super cute pictures like

AND THEN THERE’S THIS ONE

“THAT’S RIGHT TWAS I that set the house ablaze!!!”

Dying.

Every fucking time I know what’s at the bottom and every time I still lose my shit.

I’m so happy this post is back again asdlkfjsa

HAPPY TEN YEARS TO “TWAS I THAT SET THE HOUSE ABLAZE”

@hellsite-hall-of-fame @hellsite-hall-of-girlfriend

2 million

2 million f☆☆king notes.

How

addiewho:

mortimermcmirestinks:

i-give-mangos-to-people:

sherlockfandomtandem:

felagund-fiollaigean:

star-lara:

grimeclown:

skywardkonahriks-deactivated202:

grimeclown:

testicularmanslaughtrr:

aromancy:

grimeclown:

bitegore:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

Kinda fucked up and nasty how vampires drink blood, imo. Like. Pepsi costs a dollar seventy five

Hospital

Not me I’m paying a dollar seventy five. At the hospital

I feel like we’re getting off topic

So is pepsi if you steal it?

Because it’s only a dollar seventy five

Why in God’s name would a vampire drink pepsi

Why would anyone drink Pepsi?

Huh?

That’s why I’m not a fan of the sexy vampire trope.

1. It’s overused and supports the current status quote of typical vampire supremacy:worshiping rich folk.

2. Vampires prey upon humans and therefore symbolize capitalists preying on the working class.

3. Werewolves are much sexier imo.

am I having a stroke????

you might want to go to the hospital then

I hear the Pepsi is cheaper there

Enter DAISY GRIME, a CLOWN, accompanied by FOOLS, HARLEQUINS, and JESTERS.

GRIME
I say ‘tis dirty, wicked, foul, and dark –
An opportunity both miss’d and scorn’d –
That vampires of any shape or shade
Would drink the blood of innocence most pure
When Pepsi costs a dollar sev’nty five.

FIRST FOOL
O lady, I must ask, and tell the truth:
Wherever in this God’s green holy land
Canst thou obtain this drink for such a fee?
I’ve seen no less than fifty-five pence more.

GRIME
A hospital, good sir.

SECOND FOOL
(Does some figures)
                               And might I ask
Wherever in this land (of any hue)
Is fellow who two dollar thirty pence
Dost pay for si of Pep?

GRIME
                                   Not I, i’faith.
I pay a mere two shillings short of two.
And, once again, I pay in hospital.

CANADIAN JESTER
I pay a hefty two and half for mine.
But in my blood runs maple syrup, too.

GRIME
O Jester fine, I pray thee, still thyself.
Thou stray’st from this, our mode of speaking here.

FIRST FOOL
But blood costs naught but time.

SECOND JESTER
                                                Aye, that is true;
But sir, remember this in figuring:
A Pepsi, too, is free, if stolen ‘tis.

FIRST FOOL
I see, but – wait, another thought occurs.
Wherefore, I ask thee, for what reason, sirs,
Dost Lady Grime buy Pepsi from the house
Of healing, birth, and death?

GRIME
                                            ‘Tis simple, friend.
Allow me to explain to thee the cause.
The Pepsi sold by those who follow in
The footsteps of St. Luke, Evangelist
Is sold for a mere dollar sev’nty five.

FIRST HARLEQUIN
(Aside, to SECOND HARLEQUIN) Why wouldst a vampire drink Pepsi, then?

SECOND HARLEQUIN
(Aside, to FIRST HARLEQUIN) Why wouldst an honest man drink Pepsi, sir?

FIRST FOOL
A femboy, it would seem.

(There is general applause and agreement.)

GRIME
                                   O fool, a what?

Enter KONAHRIKS De’ACTIVAT EDZOZ ESQ., a SCHOLAR and WARD OF THE SKY.

WARD
You see, my friends, this selfsame story tells
The truth of why the incubus’s tale
Is one that bears to no more to be declared.
I’ll tell you all my reasons three. The first:
The wealthy ghoul who drinks the common blood
Is overused and stale, like molding bread;
But also hangs upon the teller’s face
A pallid, gasping idol worship mask.
The second mark I tally here along:
A vampire who sucks the blood from men
Does hold up in the mind a mirror cold.
This mirror shows that, far from fantasy,
The vampire is real, ‘tis Elon Musk.
The reason third is simple, clean, and pure:
A werewolf’s just, like, sexier, my dudes.

(GRIME dances like a ferret. There is rejoicing.)

Exeunt.

Enter LARA, FELAGUND, and SHERLOCK, accompanied by the MANGO MERCHANT.

LARA
I feel these words have struck me to my core.
Is this, the world, collapsing to the ground
Or is it just my weary, shaking soul?

FELAGUND
‘Twould seem my lady needs to see St. Luke.

SHERLOCK
I’ve heard his fellows sell a Pepsi cheap.

(The MANGO MERCHANT offers a mango. All weep.)

Exeunt.

Alright that’s it, we’ve got the Shakespearan translation too, this post is complete now.

addiewho:

mortimermcmirestinks:

i-give-mangos-to-people:

sherlockfandomtandem:

felagund-fiollaigean:

star-lara:

grimeclown:

skywardkonahriks-deactivated202:

grimeclown:

testicularmanslaughtrr:

aromancy:

grimeclown:

bitegore:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

grimeclown:

Kinda fucked up and nasty how vampires drink blood, imo. Like. Pepsi costs a dollar seventy five

Hospital

Not me I’m paying a dollar seventy five. At the hospital

I feel like we’re getting off topic

So is pepsi if you steal it?

Because it’s only a dollar seventy five

Why in God’s name would a vampire drink pepsi

Why would anyone drink Pepsi?

Huh?

That’s why I’m not a fan of the sexy vampire trope.

1. It’s overused and supports the current status quote of typical vampire supremacy:worshiping rich folk.

2. Vampires prey upon humans and therefore symbolize capitalists preying on the working class.

3. Werewolves are much sexier imo.

am I having a stroke????

you might want to go to the hospital then

I hear the Pepsi is cheaper there

Enter DAISY GRIME, a CLOWN, accompanied by FOOLS, HARLEQUINS, and JESTERS.

GRIME
I say ‘tis dirty, wicked, foul, and dark –
An opportunity both miss’d and scorn’d –
That vampires of any shape or shade
Would drink the blood of innocence most pure
When Pepsi costs a dollar sev’nty five.

FIRST FOOL
O lady, I must ask, and tell the truth:
Wherever in this God’s green holy land
Canst thou obtain this drink for such a fee?
I’ve seen no less than fifty-five pence more.

GRIME
A hospital, good sir.

SECOND FOOL
(Does some figures)
                               And might I ask
Wherever in this land (of any hue)
Is fellow who two dollar thirty pence
Dost pay for si of Pep?

GRIME
                                   Not I, i’faith.
I pay a mere two shillings short of two.
And, once again, I pay in hospital.

CANADIAN JESTER
I pay a hefty two and half for mine.
But in my blood runs maple syrup, too.

GRIME
O Jester fine, I pray thee, still thyself.
Thou stray’st from this, our mode of speaking here.

FIRST FOOL
But blood costs naught but time.

SECOND JESTER
                                                Aye, that is true;
But sir, remember this in figuring:
A Pepsi, too, is free, if stolen ‘tis.

FIRST FOOL
I see, but – wait, another thought occurs.
Wherefore, I ask thee, for what reason, sirs,
Dost Lady Grime buy Pepsi from the house
Of healing, birth, and death?

GRIME
                                            ‘Tis simple, friend.
Allow me to explain to thee the cause.
The Pepsi sold by those who follow in
The footsteps of St. Luke, Evangelist
Is sold for a mere dollar sev’nty five.

FIRST HARLEQUIN
(Aside, to SECOND HARLEQUIN) Why wouldst a vampire drink Pepsi, then?

SECOND HARLEQUIN
(Aside, to FIRST HARLEQUIN) Why wouldst an honest man drink Pepsi, sir?

FIRST FOOL
A femboy, it would seem.

(There is general applause and agreement.)

GRIME
                                   O fool, a what?

Enter KONAHRIKS De’ACTIVAT EDZOZ ESQ., a SCHOLAR and WARD OF THE SKY.

WARD
You see, my friends, this selfsame story tells
The truth of why the incubus’s tale
Is one that bears to no more to be declared.
I’ll tell you all my reasons three. The first:
The wealthy ghoul who drinks the common blood
Is overused and stale, like molding bread;
But also hangs upon the teller’s face
A pallid, gasping idol worship mask.
The second mark I tally here along:
A vampire who sucks the blood from men
Does hold up in the mind a mirror cold.
This mirror shows that, far from fantasy,
The vampire is real, ‘tis Elon Musk.
The reason third is simple, clean, and pure:
A werewolf’s just, like, sexier, my dudes.

(GRIME dances like a ferret. There is rejoicing.)

Exeunt.

Enter LARA, FELAGUND, and SHERLOCK, accompanied by the MANGO MERCHANT.

LARA
I feel these words have struck me to my core.
Is this, the world, collapsing to the ground
Or is it just my weary, shaking soul?

FELAGUND
‘Twould seem my lady needs to see St. Luke.

SHERLOCK
I’ve heard his fellows sell a Pepsi cheap.

(The MANGO MERCHANT offers a mango. All weep.)

Exeunt.

Alright that’s it, we’ve got the Shakespearan translation too, this post is complete now.

sparkly-butthole-on-ao3:

“Unexpected” my ass. We’ve been screaming for over a decade now about how we’re approaching an existential risk to humankind. When are people, including scientists, going to acknowledge how little we actually know? Why are we leaving this to chance instead of demanding better?

ace-aussie-asshole:

nim-lock:

therustyskull:

liina-puff:

pileofknives:

zeesqueere:

ohtehnoeszombies:

goofballproximitysurveyor-deact:

when people put “trigger warning” on their content without specifying what the trigger warning is for

this post contains notes

does it?

does it though?

Fuck is going on here

post expired

Son of no notes ghost post.

obsessed with how tumblr just sometimes Does This 

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

blackirishweab:

This is better than any Marvel movie I have ever seen

blackirishweab:

This is better than any Marvel movie I have ever seen

zvaigzdelasas:

castlevaniasymphonyofthenight:

bongwatercoffee:

castlevaniasymphonyofthenight:

kensacollection:

castlevaniasymphonyofthenight:

toastpotent:

kensacollection:

toastpotent:

kensacollection:

kidzbopdeathgrips:

castlevaniasymphonyofthenight:

toastpotent:

kidzbopdeathgrips:

toastpotent:

if i had a dollar for every pixel in this image i’d have 15 cents

if i had a dollar for every ounce of rage i felt in my body after i read this comment i would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you

actually I did the math, they would have $225, not $0.15

sis i’m right here….

if i had a dollar i would buy a can of soda :)

while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?

sorry i only have a dollar

:(

hey I just realized my friend Vriska is right, they would have $22500 not $225

^my friend Vriska

if i had $22,500 i would buy a can of soda and an apply juice

You can buy anything you want with $22500

yeah and they want soda and apply juice

apply juice to what

directly to the forehead

kira-serialfaggot:

sigmachad:

laeffy:

Hey tumblr???? Hey fucking tumblr?????

hello?

This is such a cruel, twisted world we live in. Can’t buy the dragon pussy candle because it’s company is using right wing dog whistles and Intel language.

sexygaywizard:

sexygaywizard:

Magically duplicated myself to have weird wizard sex but I actually keep trying to kill myself this is so lame :/

Created a third copy of myself hoping it would kill the duplicate but they’re having sex with each other instead. What the fuck guys

desktopatomicclocks:

my favorite type of post is the kind that has something so unexpected it isekais you into another world

zagreus:

doctress:

zagreus:

if you c*nsor anything in a post you are l*gally required to put all of the omitted v*wels at the end as a footn*te

*eeoo

Okay th*n. *f you’r* sure about th*s. 

Old Macd*nald had a farm.  

*eieio

i’m going to shatter you like glass

i-say-ok:

btc-official-deactivated2024071:

dealer: got some straight gas 🔥😛 this strain is called-

me: i dont wanna hear it man. last week it was slutweed, the week before that it was the jpeg weed that kept clipping through the paper, just give me the normal shit

dealer: aw come on man i got the cocomelon weed👶 i got the analog horror weed👁 i even got the pizza tower weed🍕 dont worry its not just oregano😉🌿

me: do you even sell normal weed. are you some kind of fucking trickster spirit.

high pitched gnomish voice from somewhere in dealer’s giant trenchcoat: i thinjk shes onto us boss

ok.

desktopatomicclocks:

empress-of-dark2005:

@lukadjo