the real honest answer to “why didnt they just [insert solution that would end the story in five minutes]” is because that would end the story in five minutes and if we lived in a world where every story ended in five minutes what would be the point
People in the notes are saying they’re not sure if this is satire or not.
It very much is, and if you haven’t seen it before, it’s also referencing the famous ‘Gotcha’ comic by the same artist that riffs on obnoxious argumentative fallacies:
Kudos to the artist for making this asshat so fucking punchable that I actually want to yeet my phone to smash his face
It’s always “revenge won’t give you back what you lost” and “murder is wrong” and never how was the bloody violent revenge the bloody violent revenge looked fun was it fun
Yeah it was pretty fun, just a lil messy, hang on let me just wash my hands real quick
My god this is applicable to so many situations: this is in no way a WE situation.
I love all this. So good. And I once saw a friend pull out the ONLY ACCEPTABLE PARENT LINE in a situation like this: “Are you hurt, or just scared?” IT WAS LIKE MAGIC. The kid paused, inhaled, looked down at the body part in question, then looked back up and said, all calm again, “Oh, just scared!” and back to business as usual.
It’s crazy to me that you never abandoned cookie clicker. It would have been so easy to just stop developing it and work on a bigger project but you decided this game was your baby and treated it with care. And can I just say the quality of the game has never dropped, never lost focus, and never stopped being fun. You inspire me man
i actually don’t want to play a civ-building game to “retrace the steps of Ramses II” or become France or build the golden gate bridge i want to start with some random tribe and give them their OWN identity and make their OWN country and build their OWN unique little things!!!
every civ game that’s not outright sci-fi or fantasy seems to fumble this so hard. “We’re not like Civilization… you can be Phoenicians in one era AND Polynesians the next” please i’m so tired. so uninterested in paint-by-numbers history
it makes sense to do things this way both for gameplay and practical reasons. ease of implementation, ease of theming civ-based bonuses etc etc. and also i do not care for it. if i start a planet from scratch i do not wish to see Earth things
listen. i see you in the replies saying Spore and Dwarf Fortress. and the thing is yes but no. Spore as we fantasized about in 2006 matches this to some degree; Spore as it released absolutely does not. it falls victim to its own scope and most meaningful choices are limited to a handful of preset routes. it is an impressive game for the breadth of cosmetic customization it offers but compared to the initial draft it retains tragically little to no simulation elements. your tribesfolks do not diverge in beliefs or culture beyond the war/commerce/religion ternary; their history does not evolve beyond the extremely simplified trait system. as for Dwarf Fortress i love it very very much but most of the neat things it does with dynamic culture (spheres, deities etc) mechanically does not do very much and is mostly there for flavor. there are some really interesting systems with historical figures and different creeds of the same species having different body types and hairstyles, but at the end of the day all dwarves enjoy beer and living underground, all elves abhor wooden goods and so on. do you understand the ideal of organic cultural growth i long for here. people have also mentioned Crusader Kings 3 and i have not yet played it so i’m gonna be doing that next
I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me
living in nyc is so fucking unserious you walk through a paramilitary operation (the nypd) to pay $2.fucking90 to use a form of transport that hasnt received maintenance since 1965 and when you get on the train youre greeted with this
i dont need therapy i need to be 8 years old at halloween again
I need to be sitting on the carpet with my siblings taking all the candy out of our baskets and sorting it into piles by type and trading the ones we don’t like
“In Russian, Baba Yaga’s name is not capitalized. Indeed, it is not a name
at all, but a description—“old lady yaga” or perhaps “scary old woman.” There
is often more than one Baba Yaga in a story, and thus we should really say
“a Baba Yaga,” “the Baba Yaga.” We do so in these tales when a story would
otherwise be confusing. We have continued the western tradition of capitalizing Baba Yaga, since the words cannot be translated and have no other
meaning in English (aside perhaps from the pleasant associations of a rum
baba). There is no graceful way to put the name in the plural in English, and
in Russian tales multiple iterations of Baba Yaga never appear at the same
time, only in sequence: Baba Yaga sisters or cousins talk about one another,
or send travelers along to one another, but they do not live together. The
first-person pronoun “I” in Russian, ‘ia,’ is also uncapitalized. In some tales
our witch is called only “Yaga.” A few tales refer to her as “Yagishna,” a patronymic form suggesting that she is Yaga’s daughter rather than Yaga herself. (That in turn suggests that Baba Yaga reproduces parthenogenetically, and
some scholars agree that she does.) The lack of capitalization in every published Russian folktale also hints at Baba Yaga’s status as a type rather than
an individual, a paradigmatic mean or frightening old woman. This description in place of a name, too, could suggest that it was once a euphemism for
another name or term, too holy or frightening to be spoken, and therefore
now long forgotten.”
— Sibelan Forrester, from her introduction to Baba Yaga: The Wild Witch of the East in Russian Fairy Tales
I feel like this suggests that - with much dedication and study - you, too, could go out into the woods and be a baba yaga.
I just think that ‘animals are living intelligent creatures that have feelings and deserve to be respected’ and 'when done properly farming is beneficial to both people and animals and there’s nothing wrong with raising and killing animals for food, clothing, and other products’ are concepts that very much can and should coexist
You cannot remove yourself from the natural cycle of life and death.
Every Friday. Every Friday i either see this post or live in fear of seeing it. I can’t wake up and say ‘it’s friday’ anymore without thinking of this post. I am living a nightmare and it’s your fault
[Image ID: A photo of a tiny kitten sitting in front of a laptop on a bed. The photo has a colorful star filter. The bold yellow text has been edited to say: “I love my puter / All my nonhuman mutuals are inside it”
I was scrolling through Twitter and found a gimmick account that would “fix” other people’s art. Except all of the changes they would make were based on an entirely nonsensical list of reasons why it was unsafe or unhealthy for an emu to eat your art. The “fixed” versions were posted alongside a photo of an actual emu eating the updated art.
Video games will stick a vaguely posh human name on the big scary monster’s health bar to let you know they were once human, but isn’t that a bit limiting? I think walking blasphemies against the natural order should be allowed to be fancy lads if they want to be. That hundred-foot pillar of screaming teeth is called Dr. Throckmorton Pomberley. What are you going to do, argue with it?
still believe that one of the greatest bits of all time was on January 6th, 2021 when. well. you know. and twitter was understandably an echo chamber of panic and fear and Justin McElroy just tweeted a selfie with a filter that was like “have a delicious national spaghetti day” followed by 3 tweets that were like “fuck. i’m sorry. i don’t know how to delete scheduled posts” and as i type this two years later i’m laughing
a belated delicious national spaghetti day to you all
