September 2023

georgebbwbush:

musicforadarkenedtheatre-deacti:

tumblr in 2020:

  • posts on your dashboard are ranked by how much the ceo personally likes them
  • a widget on everyone’s blogs that publically displays their top five search terms
  • images disabled altogether
  • they ban you if you have a custom theme
  • app crashes at a speed imperceptible to the human eye
  • you can buy little outfits for the “t” logo with real money

just-mushroom-thoughts:

massivelimestonecube:

currentlyacceptingcuddles:

ARE YOU A BONE OR BLOOD PERSON.

ARE YOU A VOID OR ABYSS PERSON.

ARE YOU A ROT OR DUST PERSON.

tumblr glitched and decided to display this post with a slight tremor and i thought i was hallucinating but i managed to record it

Blood void and rot

Bone, void and dust

No caption, just want to send you these.

centers-for-disease-control:

:

centers-for-disease-control:

:

centers-for-disease-control:

wendys-unofficial:

wendys-unofficial:

wendys-unofficial:

:

wendys-unofficial:

:

wendys-unofficial:

centers-for-disease-control:

Wonderful

What teh fuck kinda creature is that

Theyre cute

But like

Are you saying you don’t know what birds look like? :’(

I do but why do these look like THAT like what kind of bird looks like that i genuinely want to know

They’re Bitterns?

Hang on i gotta google something

Adult one looks just as fucked up but with more feathers

No! Not on my post!

Yes, yes your post

NO STOP

>:3

@posts-with-10000-notes-in-spirit

NOOOOOOOO

entryn17:

tumblr trying to be like tiktok then trying to be like twitter then giving us the 3rd unreality inducing immersive ad, its staff members being condescending to the userbase, the marketing team trying to parasocialize their way into your pockets, youtube trying to do away with adblockers after upping the percentage of ads by 40% and making it so even if your video is demonetized watchers will still get them, youtube removing the dislike button then making it so you don’t get a home feed if you have watch history turned off, google being able to remove your synched bookmarks if they don’t comply with their policy, if i listed every way in which twitter has gotten worse in the last year this post will be as long as a novel, ai generated articles and images everywhere, google searches sucking ass in general, reddit charging for its api, KOSA being introduced into the US senate, tiktok in general, every social media under the fucking sun introducing log in walls, being unable to browse most sites on mobile from the sheer amount of popups taking over your screen WAUUUGH social media being products and thus requiring infinite growth and thus trying to introduce newer and newer shit that alienates its dedicated userbase. saturated sludge era of the internet

how do i get someone to fall in love w me

kristina100000:

when was the last time you did anything good for yourself

sillyman-justgoofy:

saw the other one, this one’s a lot more brain rot esque

hollowboobtheory:

finally landed on wizard tiktok

sillyman-justgoofy:

finleycannotdraw:

duckdotcom:

would you put a discarded fruit sticker on my forehead in whimsical jest yes or no

reblog to put a discarded fruit sticker on the forehead of the person you reblogged from in whimsical jest

crazyhairadult:

catchymemes:

i have a stethoscope.

btc-official-deactivated2024071:

chananderlandersalamander:

this is the funniest thing i’ve seen on tumblr today and it’s not even a post

papasmoke:

twinberry:

papasmoke:

I do not approve of tomfoolery on my dash, everyone open a book and start reading

Sounds great! Let me just see what I’ve got on my bookshelf

Wow… Looks interesting! I wonder if I could learn anything from it.

You would have this at your disposal wouldn’t you you impish clown

esthermika:

puppygirl-hornyposting:

esthermika:

Girls love breaking laws

what law u breaking today mika

the physics one

acekoral:

kleefkruid:

Tumblr already has a personalization algorithm it’s called my beloved mutuals who have great taste and only wish to psychologically damage me sometimes

Yeah we have our own way of finding good content, by having mutuals who post good content

obscene-beans:

😯😦😧😮😲

What is this

The nuance

It’s frightening

daily-spooky:

despazito:

despazito:

HE’S BEING SENT TO POSTING SCHOOL

to reiterate, this is not jordan being silenced by the censorious trudeau regime or whatever, he is in trouble with the college of psychologists because he is touting himself as a licensed psychologist while spouting nonsense and bigotry. if he gave up his psych credentials in ontario they would get off his back but he refuses to cooperate with them

foolforshera:

funnytwittertweets:

I’d say this applies to writers as well.

sensiblereblogifposts:

ultimatebottom69:

memewhore:

Oh honey Bloody Mary would have killed you within 3 days if the summoning worked. That’s the whole point of the game.

Reblog if she killed you within 3 days of the summoning

hisuianvoltorb-deactivated20230:

mermen:

om gonna throw up laughing

if you like long plane you could like car with small wheel power. It has no upsides and many downsides

sensiblereblogifposts:

lesbx:

lesbx:

lesbx:

lesbx:

Truly pushing the limits of the special skyrim edition with this stupid sexy goblin i’ve been handcrafting from scratch with an untoddly amount of mods

ive done things with the character sliders that would make todd howartd tremble and throw up. this is gobrielle. shes built like midna on purpose and it fucks up any outfit she wears so badly. she dies in one hit to everything

this is the butterface base default model for this character mod btw. this is what i transgoblified her from

you made me accidentally say the sentence ‘i unethically bred this goblin’ to my gf irl. these are the real life consequences of the internet

Reblog if you would unethically breed this gobin

Why do u call yourself a transGIRL if you are over 18? That's pedophilic .

sensiblereblogifposts:

traykar:

blushthefemboy:

nyancrimew:

this one is always sooo funny to me, cause like ok, when some random cis woman calls herself or her friend a girl or something she’s quirky and cool, but when a trans person calls themselves a girl or a boy we’re suddenly pedophiles! hmmmm i wonder where that rhetoric comes from?

my favorite comment

Minecraft Manhunt

Reblog if you are hunting for men

are-you-judd-enough:

phoenix-lich:

phoenix-lich:

Have the plushie I’ve been workin on for the last two and a half months
But Horrorboros turned out so cute QwQ
Took me a long while to make this as I never use a sewin machine for plushies haha xD
When I saw this critter in Splatoon for the first time I knew I had to make a plushie of it
Inside the “fryin pan” in its mouth is actually a little speaker that will play the scream it makes ingame… not very loudly tho sadly

Big thanks to my good friend and assistant who would go out in hot weather to hold the Horrorboros up in front of these neat backgrounds and to lemme use his backpack for the closeup pics!

AHHHHH
Thanks for lovin horrorboros so much!!!

Congratulations on your second millenium of notes

apesoformythoughts:

sensiblereblogifposts:

insomniac-arrest:

thedreamthieves:

283,000 likes………giant meteor strike the earth rn holy shit. oh my god.

“maybe it’s not your pussy” is such a funny phrase and also correct. People wonder why chores are so hard and it’s like, friends we used to have a whole intergenerational team on this and now Grandma is locked in a beige box. Cooking is hard.

Reblog the problem is capitalism and not your pussy

sensiblereblogifposts:

crazy-pages:

capricorn-0mnikorn:

athelind:

beardedmrbean:

azzy-the-christian-furry:

bisexualshakespeare:

raevenlywrites:

worldheritagepostorganization:

kolbye:

hokuto-ju-no-ken:

pukicho:

bog-dweller-official:

pukicho:

boob-a-chu:

trilllizard420:

pukicho:

trilllizard420:

pukicho:

Doctor: $140,000 a year

Furry artist on Patreon: $160,000 a year

i think you’re lowballing the furry art amount tbh

I’m sorry for the inaccuracies, Doctor Yiff

no matter how I respond to this I don’t look good, well played. i walked right into that

Well, furry artists are typically more competent and courteous than your average doctor, so I can see that.

Did you just legitimately tell me that a person who draws wolf ass is more competent than a dude who spent 8+ years in a university to give you your lung transplant?

doctors are bullshit and furry artists perform an infinitely more valuable service to society compared to them

You will die in 7 days

It took doctor’s like 10 years to diagnose what was wrong with me, some insisting I was faking for attention while a furry artist I knew just went “that sounds like crohn’s” after hearing me complain once and ended up being right

Also I can’t go to a doctor and ask them to draw Rouge the Bat wider than she is tall with tits to match, now can I

You could if you weren’t a fucking coward

World Heritage Post

Art by coolfrogdude together at last

[ID: a comic illustrating the above thread as if it was happening in a theater. The users are mostly shaped like their icons, pukicho is a pikachu and hokuto-ju-no-ken is a gengar. The last panel is gengar looks back where a speech bubble comes out of the crowd to say, “you could if you weren’t a fucking coward.” /end]

I can’t believe I’m actually seeing this post

Magic of tumblr,

I am morally obligated to add the YouTube video whenever this thread crosses my dash

I’ve seen this thread more than a few times. But this is the first time I’ve seen this video. So thank you for your service.

Here you go redditors

Reblog if you are not a coward

sensiblereblogifposts:

isapolvorita:

Something about doofenshmirtz saying “a platypus? PERRY THE PLATYPUS” every time its so cute of him like

If he was any other villain, he will try to destroy all the platypus the first or second time perry fool him, but doof, everytime he sees a platypus, he is like “oh well, another platypus in my life, i can get used to it” the episode when perry dress as his favourite professor and when perry take off the costume, doof just say “professor you are a platypus???” but im sure he is open to just accept that sometimes people random in his life is going to be a platypus, he is not judging all the platypus he meets just because perry is his enemy.

Its sad that every time, the platypus is perry tho

Also it makes me wonder how many platypus he knows that arent perry the platypus

Reblog if you are open to accepting that sometimes random people in your life are going to be platypuses

sensiblereblogifposts:

vampiremuney:

faithdeans:

faithdeans:

faithdeans:

faithdeans:

time to see if my old mpreg player works ahhh!!!

IT WORKS!!!!

MP3 PALYER

Reblog if your mpreg player is working

sensiblereblogifposts:

tehzii:

followthebirds:

pantherwhales-spout:

izziesworldofizzie:

Every time I go downstairs to the laundry room, this pigeon tries to seduce me.

“we have incompatible genitals” is now my favorite excuse.

Reblog if you have incompatible genitals

sensiblereblogifposts:

towelthoughtsofficial:

klon09:

towelthoughtsofficial:

just-shower-thoughts:

Jake is short for Jacob, yet Blake is not short for Blacob.

Time to revisit one of my least popular posts

Then I guess you won’t have time to meet my pet snake, Snacob.

Do u actually

Reblog if you have time to meet their pet snake, Snacob.

sensiblereblogifposts:

qcon-tinuum:

STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE - 2.21 THE MAQUIS, PART II

Reblog if your emotional state is very relevant

pointless-achievements:

sensiblereblogifposts:

diners4lyfe:

speakinguv:

fgrobichiko:

merriweatherpostpavilion:

received this incomprehensible email from my ornithology professor

the fucking eagles got him

Did they turn him into a horse?

WHY would eagles turn a person into a horse?

Reblog if eagles turned you into a horse 🐴

Achievement Unlocked:

Wait… How Hungry?

Be transformed into a horse by eagles and then carried away.

jame7t:

r0zeclawz:

jame7t:

gosh I hope they never discover a creature called “the scary blood-eater” woow

hey 😁

Does anyone else hear the small scampering of what very well could be a the scary blood eater

daily-spooky:

Your daily dose of spooky posts

color-picked-pride-flags:

fishtrouts:

Ominous..

imsopopfly:

qqueenofhades:

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

memewhore:

(Soundwave voice) LAKE SUPERIOR

REPUBLICANS INFERIOR

Can’t believe nobody has added the thrilling sequel:

Hello 911 I just witnessed two entire murders

catasters:

thearchaeologicalwitch:

the-aefe:

catbot2000:

maxdowt:

candyredterezii:

afloweroutofstone:

Tea party

fae court

The council to decide your fate

The hiring panel for the fourth council member representing the “Autumn” court.

gothiccharmschool:

lastsonlost:

shrike-dyke:

garrettwrites:

Follow me on Twitter for more vampire nonsense

human: dude you’ve been in our d&d group for literally like three years, you don’t need to keep asking if you’re invited every time

vampire: i knowww, i just get anxious ok?

human: oh fair

I feel personally attacked. Lol

IT’S CALLED AN AESTHETIC, SUSAN.

weiwei-uplink:

plaguedocboi:

Wait, beneath the sea floor?

OUGHGH??

OIUOHGHHVOIH!!!!!

escuerzoresucitado:

gingeremo:

derinthescarletpescatarian:

“The trannies should be able to piss in whatever toilet they want and change their bodies however they want. Why is it my business if some chick has a dick or a guy has a pie? I’m not a trannie or a fag so I don’t care, just give ‘em the medicine they need.”

“This is an LGBT safe space. Of COURSE I fully support individuals who identify as transgender and their right to self-determination! I just think that transitioning is a very serious choice and should be heavily regulated. And there could be a lot of harm in exposing cis children to such topics, so we should be really careful about when it is appropriate to mention trans issues or have too much trans visibility.”

One of the above statements is Problematic and the other is slightly annoying. If we disagree on which is which then working together for a better future is going to get really fucking difficult.

sevens-evan:

idk man i think that if you can read dozens and dozens of trans men talking about how their support systems abandoned them when they started getting too masculine on T or had top surgery or whatever, and queer spaces started treating them like threats or potential predators, and you find these stories going back to the 90s or even earlier, and you read all of that and come away thinking that there’s nothing wrong with how progressive communities treat men, you are just fundamentally beyond help dude. you don’t see us as people

bruno-has-definitely-deactivate:

teaboot:

Whoever needs to hear this. Please know.

“Closed at 6pm” does not mean “The entry door locks up at 6, but if you’re already inside you can keep on shopping.”

It means, “you should be finished and out of the store at 6pm.”

This is not up for debate

This is just how things work

derinthescarletpescatarian:

Thinking about those egg tubes

caats:

tonysopranobignaturals-deactiva:

doubledumbass:

Wish this would specify the purpose of hostile architecture - preventing homeless people from surviving.