The straight woman is unsatisfied with straight studio porn. She wants to get off to something in which the actors actually emote and show passion beyond canned moans from the women and, at best, vacant grunts from the men. She turns to gay porn. She knows it’s not “for her,” but neither was the straight porn, and at least the actors look like they’re enjoying themselves. And for a short while she is satiated by Sean Cody et al, but she runs into the same problems she had to begin with. She was not looking at sex but a simulacrum of sex, trapped in Plato’s cave. Unsatisfied, she turned to vintage gay porn, harkening to a time when most gay bars still had darkrooms and reliably smelled of piss and Amyl Nitrate. Here was the real thing, in all its animalistic passion. But she still couldn’t immerse herself in the fantasy. She wanted the media to engage with her own imagination and meet her half-way, rather than having it spoonfed to her onscreen. She turned to yaoi, with its elongated figures reminiscent of mannerist portraiture, then bara, including hardcore BDSM scenes. But the tactile sensations depicted in the pages didn’t do justice to their real life counterparts. She turned deeper into her own imagination, this time reading erotica. No, not the poolside paperbacks sold at Barnes and Noble. The good shit. Why then, was she still not satisfied? She dug deeper, searching for the true meaning of eroticism. She studied the psychoanalysis of Freud, the cultural criticism of Susan Sontag the feminist poetry of Audre Lorde. She took vacation time and flew to Europe, starting at the caves of Lascaux to explore the human urge to create, then traversed the Camino de Santiago on foot, along the way meeting a 56 year old carpenter from Burgos named Andrés, with whom she had an explosive affair. They both knew it couldn’t last, which made them cherish each other’s touch all the more. Upon flying home, she gave up. If her search for true eroticism never bore fruit this whole time, why would it now? It would take years before she stumbled upon the answer by pure happenstance: dubstep.
just saw someone post “it’s common knowledge ur not supposed to spam reblog from someone ur not mutuals with” …..?????????? am i confused??? IS that common knowledge???? i try not to spam if i can help it but i actually personally love seeing spam notifs lmao??? unless i dont know what spam reblog means
Reblog if you like it when people “spam reblog” from you or whenever that means at any time
my friend told me last night that he gets girls to come back to his place by telling them “oh i can’t wait to go home and have some stew” and “i’m so hungry, good thing i have stew at home” and it’s worked every time
bro the worst part is last night i went to his place and it’s 11pm and i’m sitting there eating fucking stew like god damn it worked on me too
Since the virtual reality service’s launch in 2021, the so-called “successor to the mobile internet” became the recipient of a kind of soaring hype few things are ever blessed with. According to Insider, McKinsey claimed that the Metaverse would bring businesses $5 trillion in value. Citi valued it at no less than $13 trillion.
There was only one problem: The whole thing was bullshit. Far from being worth trillions of dollars, the Metaverse turned out to be worth absolutely bupkus. It’s not even that the platform lagged behind expectations or was slow to become popular. There wasn’t anyone visiting the Metaverse at all.
The sheer scale of the hype inflation came to light in May. In the same article, Insider revealed that Decentraland, arguably the largest and most relevant Metaverse platform, had only 38 active daily users. The Guardian reported that one of the features designed to reward users in Meta’s flagship product Horizon Worlds produced no more than $470 in revenue globally. Thirty-eight active users. Four hundred and seventy dollars. You’re not reading those numbers wrong. To say that the Metaverse is dead is an understatement. It was never alive.
late late capitalism is just an infinite amount of increasingly intense fyre festivals built on top of each other
Since the virtual reality service’s launch in 2021, the so-called “successor to the mobile internet” became the recipient of a kind of soaring hype few things are ever blessed with. According to Insider, McKinsey claimed that the Metaverse would bring businesses $5 trillion in value. Citi valued it at no less than $13 trillion.
There was only one problem: The whole thing was bullshit. Far from being worth trillions of dollars, the Metaverse turned out to be worth absolutely bupkus. It’s not even that the platform lagged behind expectations or was slow to become popular. There wasn’t anyone visiting the Metaverse at all.
The sheer scale of the hype inflation came to light in May. In the same article, Insider revealed that Decentraland, arguably the largest and most relevant Metaverse platform, had only 38 active daily users. The Guardian reported that one of the features designed to reward users in Meta’s flagship product Horizon Worlds produced no more than $470 in revenue globally. Thirty-eight active users. Four hundred and seventy dollars. You’re not reading those numbers wrong. To say that the Metaverse is dead is an understatement. It was never alive.
In the mid-1950s in the PnFverse, there was a highly-charged anti-palindrome atmosphere in Britain that forced people with names that were palindromes to go into hiding.
remember that interviews are not about giving a good and honest first impression that they’ll carefully consider. interviews are about saying the special words and phrases they’re looking for that give you points and when they tally those up whoever earned the most job points wins
they don’t want to “know you” they want you to walk in there and regurgitate everything the job description said
isnt even a joke btw if you’re autistic and/or unemployed and nobody taught you this yet i’m really sorry
when i was a kid i used to respond to the “glass half full/half empty” question by asking how the liquid in the glass got there in the first place. nobody ever gave me a chance to explain my reasoning so i’m doing it now
if you have a glass and it has some liquid in it, up to the halfway line, whether it is empty or full depends on what happened before the question was asked. if you started with a full glass and poured half out until only half remained, the glass is half empty, because if you continued pouring it would be fully empty. however, if you started with an empty glass and poured liquid from another container into the glass up to the halfway line, the glass is half full because if you continued pouring it would be all the way full. logical, no?
i was 13 years old when somebody finally told me it was supposed to be some kind of optimism/pessimism thing. i always thought it was a riddle that nobody let me solve
[Image: A tuxedo cat named “Office Assistance for hire Prince” on petfinder. He is lying on his side on a white desk. There are office supplies in the background.]
the poppyplaytime joyville garten of banban style games influx started to annoy me awhile ago but then i started thinking of them as all being part of the same really fucked up universe where its just normal for kids attractions to end in horrible crimes against humanity and it became much funnier
kids in the 80s: aw yeah. did you hear they shut that toy factory down for using kids consciousness to make living toys? yeah thats crazy. hey anyway wanna get a slice of pizza at that new spot with the singing bear guy?
yeah sure let me just go to the vending machine for a horny soda infused with the souls of those sacrificed to resurrect the company founder’s son as a monstrous can
why is the soda horny. why did you make the soda horny
I just. I just… i have discovered something. And I have laughed too much. I have laughed every time I have tried to explain it to someone. I cannot get through this.
Look. Okay.
There are two things you need to know, here.
First: There’s a style of Greek pottery that was popular during the Hellenic period, for which most of the surviving examples are from southern Italy. We call them ‘fish plates’ because, well, they’re plates, and they’re decorated with fish (and other marine life).
Like this one, currently in the Met:
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Or this one, currently in the Cleveland Museum of Art:
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They’re very cool. We’re not 100% sure what they were for, because most of the surviving ones were found as grave goods, but that’s a different post.
The second thing you need to know is that when we (Classics/archaeology/whatever as a discipline) have a collection of artefacts, like vases, sculptures, paintings, etc. and we do not know the name of the artist, but we’re pretty sure one artist made X, Y and Z artefacts, we come up with a name for that artist. There are a whole bunch of things that could be the source for the name, e.g. where we found most of their work (The Dipylon Master) or the potter with whom they worked (the Amasis Painter), a favourite theme (The Athena Painter), the Museum that ended up with the most famous thing they did (The Berlin Painter) or a notable aspect of their style. Like, say, The Eyebrow Painter.
Guess what kind of pottery the Eyebrow Painter made?
Gym teacher: You have no body tension! You need to train more!
Me who doesn’t have enough bone or muscle to provide my body with structural support without the pressure of the deep sea:
No! This is not true, and not why blobfish end up like that! They have plenty of structure, in fact, they’re very bony! I’ll write more on this, but it’s a little pet peeves misconception about deep sea creatures and relates to the physiology of humans doing scuba
don’t their cells basically explode when the pressure of their environment is too high?
Okay. So this is a pedantic distinction with a fun and interesting answer, with some connections to other fun facts, so I find it fun to write about. I think a moment that drove home that this was a slight misconception that people had was a time I talked about the Monterey Bay Aquarium’s deep sea exhibit. A lot of people were confused that the tanks aren’t pressurized. They’re literally just normal fishtanks, albeit at the proper temperature, salinity, etc, but pressure wise, you can see the open top of the tanks if you look up through them. And the fish inside are fine! While they don’t have blob sculpins there, they do have many other bony fish that come from the same depths. Many other aquariums have similar setups. So how is this possible, if blobfish “explode” when they come to the surface?
If there’s one way to summarize the key takeaway here, it’s this:
Air is compressible and changes volume depending on pressure. Water does not. This includes the water inside your cells.
So let’s imagine that we’re at the surface of the ocean, and we will a plastic bag with seawater, and completely seal it. Then, we dive down, taking the bag with us. What will that bag look like at the bottom? Well… pretty much the exact same. It’ll be the exact same volume, exert the same pressure, etc. Now imagine that we take the bag down empty, fill it with water at the bottom, and take it to the top. What will it look like? Well, also the exact same. Even though the water at the bottom was at pressure, water is incompressible, and so the “pressurized” water occupies the same volume as the water at the surface. No expansion, no explosion.
What this functionally means is that there’s actually very little adaptations required to live in the deep ocean for pressure. Do the dark, cold, limited food, and thousands of other harsh conditions of that environment have to be adapted to? Sure. But not really the pressure. Many fish freely move up and down in the water column over depth and pressure changes regularly.
(disclaimer: there are also some adaptations to pressure that deal with complex 3D protein structures, and how rigid they are. But these wouldn’t cause any problems with decompression- they’re more equivalent to adding a steel beam or strut to something to fortify it, and just make things molecularly more rigid for protein protein interactions. But it has nothing to do with the “explosion”. They’re poorly understood though.)
So what’s the problem then?
Well, remember that air is compressible. Now lets redo that bag thing, except inflate the bag with air at the surface. We’ll bring it down to depth, and the bag will deflate and crush. The pressure on the bag will compress the air (good old PV=nRT) and it will occupy less volume. We bring it back up, and the bag re-expands.
Now lets do something slightly different. Lets take the bag to the bottom, and fill it with air from a SCUBA tank. Tank air is compressed beyond what the ocean will compress it to, but once released from the tank, it will expand to match the pressure of the surrounding water. Let’s fill the bag with that at the bottom, and then bring it to the top.
Now the bag bursts.
This is what’s happening to the poor blob sculpin. Every bony fish has a gas-filled swim bladder used to regulate its buoyancy. As they swim up and down in the water column, they’re able to release this gas and replace it with metabolic processes, allowing the swim bladder to have a dynamic amount of gas in it and never burst. If, however, you yoink it from the bottom of the ocean and drag it up without it ever having time to properly offgas…. the gas in the swim bladder expands outwards to the only place it can go. In this case, that’s the surrounding tissue of the fish, leading to the traditional blob corpse we all know about.
So why was this post’s wording wrong?
Well, a blobfish does have enough structure to exist without pressure. There’s nothing about it that needs constant pressure. In theory, you could collect a blobfish from the bottom of the ocean, bring it up really slowly, let it equalize appropriately, and keep it in a tank at surface pressure. In fact, the Monterey Bay Aquarium (as mentioned previously) and California Academy of Sciences developed a decompression chamber to do exactly that:
While its physically hard to use at the depths that blob sculpins live at (most notably bc they use human divers for this), there’s no theoretical reason why that approach wouldn’t work on them.
There’s a couple of other fun facts related to this. Notably, there are lots of fish that live at incredibly variable depths, but follow particular temperatures. Rockfish off the California coast tend to follow the depth that gives them the right temperatures, and some of the same fish you can find at the surface in Monterey are deepwater prize catches in San Diego.
Additionally, only bony fish have this problem. Sharks, who regulate their buoyancy with liver oils instead of gas swim bladders, freely move between depths without worrying about gas regulation. Crustaceans as well, which is why deep sea crab fishing doesn’t result in exploded crabs.
The dangers of SCUBA are also almost entirely because of this principle. There are very few problems with descending and high pressure on its own (with a couple of notable exceptions), but decompression of previously compressed gases during the ascent can easily be deadly.
This is all a bit pedantic, but its a little misconception that many people have that I think its fun to clear up a little.
Thanks for this really cool info dump :D Id like to apologize for peddling false blob fish propaganda it seems I bought into the lies of big fish \lh
I remade the meme to do the blob fish justice.
Gym Teacher: You have no body tension! You need to train more!
Me who didn’t get enough time to properly regulate the gas in my swim bladder while being pulled to the surface:
Also while i looked up more about swim bladders I found out that when they examined the sea floor with sonar tech from WW2 they found the seafloor to be several hundred meters less deep than it actually was because millions of lil marine creatures were obscuring the sonar with their swim bladders. Good on them 👍
Oooo you’re gonna make me do a ramble about the deep sea scattering layer at some point, but I’m very eepy rn
people need to accept that some gay/lgbt people are terrible and some gay/lgbt people are boring and it doesnt make them Actually Straight or anything
big pet peeve of mine is gay internet users talking about ellen degeneres and pete buttigieg and acting like they’re “basically straight” as if both these people aren’t literally married to someone of the same sex sleeping in the same bed with them and having gay sex with their gay spouses and as if ellen degeneres coming out wasn’t such a huge moment in the lesbian community and pop culture as a whole that the biggest lesbian website for decades after that was called afterellen like unfortunately being gay doesn’t make you immune to being friends with war criminals.
this message belongs on my blog more than once for the simple fact that not enough people have seen it and let it sink in really deeply
i bet if walter white had tumblr hed be like “i am the one who blogs haha”
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just got a beautiful ring from the store, can’t wait to show it off here!
#my purchases #marie speaks
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🌶️ capncook
finally scored a new job can i get a hell yeah. back to making stacks dawg
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HELP A DISABLED TEEN’S FATHER AFFORD CANCER TREATMENT!
I didn’t want to have to make this post, but deadlines are closing in and I don’t have many options left.
My name is Walter White Junior, and my father was recently diagnosed with cancer. He’s been battling for a few months now, and he wants us not to worry about him, but he can’t keep pulling money out of nowhere. I’ve done the math, and I’ve estimated that he needs $12k to afford all the treatment he needs.
Any donations are appreciated! You can donate directly at my website, or donate on p@yp@l, under the username flynwyte.
407/12,000
(do not tag as donation!)
#donation
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👨🏾💼 gustavo-fring
I am pleased to announce that we have finally hired a new social media intern.
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yo yo yo whaddup chicken lovas!!! were bringin back the 2-for-1 honey mustard wings combo, with that signature taste you cant help but love! get it today, bitches!
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okay, you know what? No. I’m sick of this. Kleptomania is a valid mental disorder, and if i have to explain to you why, then i will.
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#marie speaks #rant
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🌶️ capncook
bored on the job man its got me thinkin…
#vent post #delete later
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i can’t say shit around my grandpa bro. i make a comment about the lakers one time and its 😤🛎️🛎️🛎️😤🛎️🛎️😤😤🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️🛎️ im fuckin SICK OF IT!!
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i miss her so much man…
#vent post #delete later
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We would like to apologize for our social media intern’s mistake. As a token of our apology, we are offering a 10% discount on any chicken order if you mention this post. Have a finger-lickin’ day!
PREHISTORIC PROTO-MONKEY: I don’t need ascorbic acid. From my cells. I eat fruit all the time dude. I’m better than that OTHER PREHISTORIC PROTO-MONKEY: I agree with your lifestyle and will fuck you raw to prove it GUY LOOKING FOR THE NORTHWEST PASSAGE 36,530,125 YEARS LATER: ow oof my shitty british teeth
If there was a way to run SUPER MEGA AD BLOCKER on this website I fucking would
“Please oh please open up your computer to a porn virus! If you don’t you’re evil!”
Freeloader Comin’ through!
We didn’t start this war internet users have with ads - We might have moaned about banner ads, but it was only when they started making noises when we might be listening to music or a podcast or whatever, causing two sound sorces at once, that we started trying to block ads universally rather than just a specific type of ad (pop ups).
And since then ads have gotten worse - Actual malware rather than merely breaking one of the fundamental sins of web design - though shalt not autoplay anything with sound. And the more aggressive a website is with ‘please turn off adblock’ the less I trust it to bother to vet ads and advertisers to make sure they’re not installing malware.
Not to mention that the idea that avoiding ads is “freeloading” is hilariously backward. Advertisement is a transaction between the platform and the advertiser, the user has no obligation to provide the views/clicks the platform has promised. Using an adblocker isn’t freeloading in the same way that leaving the room to get a snack during a commercial break isn’t cheating the tv network.
Ok y’all, I work as a web developer and I’m here to tell you that you are 100% right and that it’s shit. SO I’m going to tell you how to get around websites that block you from using their website if you’re using an adblocker.
Every website uses a language called JavaScript; long story short it’s a website language that allows developers to do the crazy shit you see on websites. Now the easiest thing to do is to disable JavaScript to stop them from knowing you have an adblocker:
Oh no! I’m blocked from viewing the website. It would be a terrible shame if I were able to right click and select the “inspect” feature
Click the three dots in the top right and open the “Settings” Menu
And then scrolled down to “Debugger” and checked the “Disable Javascript Option”
One quiet day on the farm, the Little Red Hen found some wheat seeds and decided to make bread.
“Who will help me plant these seeds?” the Little Red Hen asked.
“I would.” said the Horse “But I’m a workhorse, and I’m too busy moving carts around.”
And so the Little Red Hen planted the seeds by herself. And they grew into bountiful golden crops.
“Who will help me harvest the wheat?” the Little Red Hen asked.
“I would.” said the Dog “But I’m a guarddog, and I’m too busy keeping away burglars and predators.”
And so the Little Red Hen harvested the wheat herself and made it into flour.
“Who will help me bake the flour?” the Little Red Hen asked.
“I would.” said the Pig “But I’m a mother of 5 newborn piglets, and I’m too busy taking care of my young.”
And so the Little Red Hen baked the bread herself into twenty beautiful loaves.
“Who will help me eat the bread?” the Little Red Hen asked.
“We would.” said the Farm Animals. “But we’re ashamed, for we didn’t do anything to make the bread.”
“Nonsense!” said the Little Red Hen. “You, Horse, helped move around the stones that built my oven. You, Dog, kept me safe while I worked. And you, Pig, are raising a new generation of Farm Animals, who will too contribute to our Farm one day. You’ve all helped me so much by simply being you.”
“Besides,” the Little Red Hen added. “I couldn’t possibly eat all the loaves on my own, most of them would go to waste. Come, eat with me.”
And so the Little Red Hen and the Farm Animals ate the bread together. And all saw their own, and each other’s, worth.
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