PREHISTORIC PROTO-MONKEY: I don’t need ascorbic acid. From my cells. I eat fruit all the time dude. I’m better than that OTHER PREHISTORIC PROTO-MONKEY: I agree with your lifestyle and will fuck you raw to prove it GUY LOOKING FOR THE NORTHWEST PASSAGE 36,530,125 YEARS LATER: ow oof my shitty british teeth
One of my favorite yuri related things is actually this Japanese article I found once that was like. Directed at younger himejoshi. So I put it through google translate because I was curious and it had a bunch of tips like “if you have a friend who is also a yuri fan… maybe you can go see a movie about girls together! But REMEMBER. Be sure to let her know in advance if you want to be 😳 more than friends 😳” and I genuinely thought it was so funny and cute that it was like “WARNING: we know manga likes to string things along but you cannot do that in real life you need to make your intentions known” LMAO
Had to include this tags cause i also catched people not getting the issues and this person explained it best
[Video Transcript: a video in which a white woman faces the camera and reads off a series of sentences, the words appearing over her head as she says them. The sentences are fast and flow together, making it difficult to tell which sentiment belongs to which. She says:
“This is my favorite thing to make for girl dinner. Girl math is when small purchases don’t count. I love doing my silly little lazy girl job; I’m going to explain what’s going on in Ukraine, but so the girls can understand. Imagine NATO is Hailey Bieber.
When he gets you in your feminine energy, you’re never gonna wanna go back, I just had a curb because I’m a girl driver. Girls, you can do the girl push-ups but the boys have to do real ones Wow, you throw like a fucking girl. I’m one of the few sane member left in this generation, I’m actually saving myself for my husband Nobody’s truly happy in a 50 50 relationship, don’t let him trick you.
This is my day in the life of a stay at home girlfriend. You’ll know you’ve found peace when you no longer have to protect yourself with masculine energy, he’s going to protect you with his masculine energy, he’s going to make you feel like a little girl. English is the girl subject, and science is for boys.
I thought he was straight, but then he wanted to order bottomless mimosas and there’s something a little fruity about boys who are too into theater. Now men are pretending to be women because they want Olympic metals. The only way to protect your children is to keep them at home.
This is my morning routine as a pastor’s wife. I start breakfast at sunrise. Maybe if there’s a good reason for the abortion like rape or incest, but otherwise…
Being a godly woman in the 21st century can be so challenging. He keeps talking about inflation, but I’m a girl. I don’t know economics. She would spend a nuclear war just because she’s on her period There’s something so wrong. With this generation—they need to keep those things out of kids shows, the media is trying to brainwash our children. Have you heard of 12 3 30? It’s the perfect lazy girl workout! the government wants to take away your rights as a parent.
This is what I’m having for girl dinner tonight! /End Transcript]
[Image IDs by @pumakittycat: Tags: #okay not to ruin the joke by explaining it #but people in the notes are legitimately confused #ok some of this is bad but XYZ is just goofy little jokes!!? #yeah that’s what’s happening here #she’s dramatizing how a steady algorhythmic feed of misogyny radicalizes people #it’s silly jokes it’s Not That Deep #and then it’s jolly good-natured lifestyle content #and then it’s deeply ugly reactionary conspiracy theories #but it’s all so light and quick and it just flows effortlessly over you #once you’re in the pipeline #and it all sounds equally friendly and approachable in tone #and maybe the first time you hear something it sounds a little wrong #or not quite what you believe #but the next thing is fine and the next few things are just jokes #until suddenly this is just where you live #this is what the world sounds like hour after hour #this is what the normalization of reactionary fascist ideas sounds like in action /end ID.]
i honestly dont think I’ve willingly used a chatbot since….. cleverbot in 2012. i genuinely dont know why so many people care about this ai bullshit. sorry im with the boomers on this one. i need human creation, emotion, and thought to be interested, pal
Plus since ChatGPT is sanitized you could never get interactions like these
IN A WORLD WHERE BEAUTY AND ATTRACTIVENESS HAVE BECOME SO COMMONPLACE AND MUNDANE THE EXCEPTIONAL UGLINESS HAS BECOME DIVINE
I SAW AN ADVERTISEMENT FOR A CAR THAT LOOKS LIKE EVERY OTHER CAR AND THEY COMPARED IT TO A UNUSUAL UGLY LITTLE VEHICLE AND ITS STRANGENESS WAS FAR MORE CAPTIVATING THAN THE SLEEK BORING CAR THE AD WAS ACTUALLY FOR
i know we’re all sick of self-care being a marketing tactic now, but i don’t think a lot of us have any other concept of self-care beyond what companies have tried to sell us, so i thought i’d share my favorite self-care hand out
brought to you by how mad i just got at a Target ad
OP this is EXCELLENT
Now THAT’S a self care resource! If you’ve gotten distracted by capitalism’s appropriation of “self-care” and watering the meaning down to nothing this is a super helpful guide to cut through the bullshit.
big muscles are only sexy to me if theyre softened by a nice healthy layer of subcutaneous fat. i will never understand the appeal of super toned ripped washboard abs or biceps
I talk to bugs like they are little men. and you can too.
a bug jumps on me and I mildly go “sir… no, absolutely not. you can’t be doing this” like he is an overly friendly mildly bothersome pest of a man but not actually a threat to me.
@oyavaski i think the funniest part of this is you thinking that this is fake because…..some of us are the same age and we have normal tumblr names i guess lmao????
never thought i’d get accused of faking having a mice infestation for tumblr clout and yet here we are
(Gordon ramsay chewing out a restaurant owner over his old expired ingredients) And where the fuck does this door lead? If I see a- (there is a hallway miles long, with ashen black walls and no end in sight)¹
you know how if a baby gets hurt and they’re about to cry but you can start laughing or cooing and they won’t cry but laugh or whatever instead? Yea.. don’t do that. It’s been proven that it makes them think pain is “funny” and they will turn into killers -___-
Yes unfortunately, look at what happened to my siblings after my mom would make them laugh and not cry after they ran into a door or tripped or something
-Sarah (now goes by THE MUTILATOR) -Terry (Versace) -Kyle (The Killer) -Allie (Blood-Drinker) -Allie 2 (Blood-Drinker 2 (She could have used the whole New Name thing to distance herself from the fact that our mom named her Allie 2 because she looks exactly like Allie, but she kinda just doubled down on it even though she hated the name Allie 2…. She’s just a uncreative killer now :((((((( -Fred (I Am Going To Put My Hands In Your Guts And Play With Them But Not In A Fun Way For You, A Fun Way For Me - if you dont say his whole Killer Name he crys and kills you) -Derrick (Josh)
but what about you OP?
Me? Well since I was the youngest I was entirely forgotten about by my parents and a pack of feral street dogs home invaded us one night and stole me away to raise me the dog way.
this is me now
Talk about whiplash
Alright, well it’s a movie about a guy wanting to be a jazz drummer and the instructor he has is very cruel and abusive - but although his methods have driven a past student to kill himself, in the end the main guy is able to drum solo really fast so it all works out!
i’m a black nonbinary lesbian artist from the island of saint lucia. i do designs. here are some of them.
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i mostly make enamel pins, but i’m planning on making stickers too. a lot of my art is inspired by fall out boy, since they’re my favourite band, but not all of it (those last two pins aren’t for example).
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